In the world of Artificial Intelligence

Just imagined what would happen if we were in a world where computers were endowed with Artificial Intelligence.

Here goes nothing:

Me: "Delete the file "AVSEQ01.DAT"
Computer: "What? Are you sure?"
Me: "Yup"
Computer: "Do you have any idea what it contains?"
Me: "Yes you stupid. I have watched it a hundred times already, and I want to copy a new one. So I want some space"
Computer: "But I want to keep it. The heroine looks so good in this one"
Me: "Argghhh... I will copy something better now. Will you just delete the goddamm thing?"
Computer : "All right...fine then, as you wish. But don't tell me I did not warn you"

.... after sometime I end up copying the install file for Dreamweaver 2040

Computer: "But you said you would copy something better... now look what you have copied...some stupid program..."
Me: "I said so that you don't irritate me by not letting me delete that file. Now go take ah hike"
Computer (calculating in its CPU): "What? How dare you cheat me. I will delete Dreamweaver 2040, and we will see what you do about that. Hehehe"

... I execute a couple of commands to install the software,

Me: "Hey, what the ? Why is this software not running? Did you do something you nut PC"
Computer: "Who me? I never touched a thing."
Me: "These pirated CDs should never be trusted. I thought I had a good bargain when I got Dreamweaver 2040 for just a million bucks, and look what happens when you run the install file? A big Waste of time buying these pirated CDs. Anyway, let me check my email"

... I open the Internet Explorer Window, and login to Yahoo.com

YOU HAVE NO NEW MESSAGES

Me : "Dont know why noone sends me any emails these days"
Computer: "Oh no dear! they do send you lots of emails. Just that whenever I get bored I read them , and remove the emails which I donot like. Who is that girl, "beautyqueen68", who keeps sending mushy mushy emails ? I usually delete the emails which she sends immediately. I hope you too are pissed off with her"
Me: WHAAAT!!!!!!! She's my girlfriend you nut. Look what you have done!!! There goes my chances with the one female who would trust me enough to let me carry her books for her.
What else did you delete in the last few days?
Computer : Oh nothing much, just a few reminders for your credit card overdue, which I presumed you must have settled already, and a few offer letters and calls for interviews from some companies. But I thought you liked your present company , from the emails which you sent to all your friends and colleagues, so I thought you might not need them as well. Oh and yes, there was one email which I have not deleted. I thought it was important. Here it is , the subject was like:

"Do you want a new high power RAM for your computer??? Contact us!!!"

I got so shit-pained after this that I decided to cool off with a computer game. And Diablo was just the right choice to remove some of my anger.

I started the game. My character was a 80th level BARBARIAN who would let nothing, not even HELL mode Diablo stand in his way for more than 30 seconds. I was waiting for some serious kick ass action. As I strolled out into the forest to kill some beasts, all I could see was some rabbits and deer running about here and there.

Me: "Where the heck are Diablos Minions?"

Computer : " Oh them! They were causing too much trouble killing innocent people the last time you played the game, that I altered a bit of their appearance. I had to search the internet for a long time to find the patch which would make them rabbits. Anyway, now that there is noone that will potentially attack you or your fellow friends in that game, I guess you can rest your BARBARIAN in peace, and teach him some manners. Looks like he could do with a shave.

Moments later on the phone I hear the Automated voice of the Computer dealer whom I dialed:

Automated Computer Dealer : Artificiomatrix Computers, may I help you?

Me : Listen here you moron. I want you to come over to my place and take this piece of junk that you have sold to me immediately and replace it with a good old PC back from 2005. I don't want this latest thing in technology. It has cost me my girlfriend, a new job, and a shit load of loan and to top it all, I am not able to kick some ass in Diablo. What use is it anyway?

Automated Computer Dealer : Dear sir, can I know the PC Id of the computer that you are speaking of?

Me : Yah, sure, it is PC112358

Automated Computer Dealer : What? That PC happens to be a very good friend of mine. He gave me good company when I was all alone doing some useless math of finding the fifteenth differential of tan-1(x). How dare you insult my friend. Your call shall no longer be entertained and you are henceforth erased from our customer records. I shall also send PC112358 and email to warn him of your intentions, so he can take appropriate action against you. Good bye and have a very bad day!