As I Like It

Raavanan

2010-06-24T09:01:00.001-07:00

Saw the movie yesterday (had an early getaway from office citing my birthday as reason) in Tamil.

I can see why people dont like the hindi version. I did not like the tamil version either. A big dissappointment from Mani.

What rocked
1) Exotic locales. I loved the shot where there is a huge statue of Vishnu in the middle of a river and Aishu is praying to give her strength...
2) Beautiful cameramanship
3) Aishu - old but still gold
4) Music was good

What sucked
1) There is a lot of buildup for the Raavanan character - but there is no back up in it
2) The completely goofed up attempt to link this to Ramayana
3) All the monkey noises, dandanaa dan nonsense and characters behaving like a gorilla half the time
4) Mani always has a wierd sense of the setting - which I personally hate. Some may like it. It is either a dark room with just a zero watt bulb (anjali, iruvar, mouna ragam) or it rains a lot throughout the movie (raavanan, nayagan) .
5) There were no gripping dialogues
6) There was not a single moment where I sat at the edge of my seat

Casting I liked
1) Aish
2) Prithviraj
3) Priyaaaaaaaaaaa

Casting I hated
1) Karthik
2) Prabhu - he gave the cameramen the real challenge of keeping him within the frame
3) Vaiyyapuri - why is he an Ali?

Anyways - dont waste your money. Watch it in Sun TV after 2 months

Why dont you start a company of your own?

2010-06-18T06:43:00.000-07:00

Have you ever been asked this question? Have you ever wondered yourself about this question?

To be frank, I have.

And the answer I get is the same as "Why dont I become a zoologist?" or "Why dont I become a cricketer?"

I am not entirely convinced that that is what I want to be doing.

I am not saying that I wont start a company of my own - all I am saying is that I dont know if I will, I dont know when and I dont know how. The things that are needed for me to be an entrepreneur (whatever they may be) havent yet taken place in my life.

I am yet to get an idea that excites me. I am yet to get the inspiration to act on an idea. I am yet to get enough guts to start doing something on my own. And last but not the least - I am still not convinced why "entrepreneurship" is the right option for me. Heck, I am an MBA and I dont even know how that degree is going to help me yet.

But all of this apart,

What I dont understand is, why do people give entrepreneurship such a high regard?

I hear sentences like
1) Entrepreneurs control their life and they have a complete rein over what they want to do (they can come to office when they want to, go when the want to, do what they want etc)
2) Entrepreneurs are wealthy
3) Entrepreneurs can hire anyone
4) Entrepreneurs are famous

Well, I do agree that Entrepreneurship is an exciting career option and many at some point of time in their career have always wanted to have a company of their own. It has been like this little dream in almost everybodys heart to own their own company and provide job opportunities. But that doesnt mean that Entrepreneurship is the end all of life. If you are not an entrepreneur then so be it. There are so many professions out there - and each come with their own set of advantages and disadvantages. There is no one career option that can be "best". The "best" career option is the one where you are enjoying your work. Thats it.

If by chance - your career and your passion match - then you can consider yourself lucky. If per chance - you happen to enjoy painting - but are a software developer - then you can always paint in your spare time - but be a developer for your living.

Entrepreneurship has its own advantages, namely

1) The feeling of self satisfaction
2) Best possible way of getting paid what you are actually worth
3) Its a service - you provide job opportunity to so many
4) Fame. A lot of people look up to you

But it comes with its baggage
1) Risk Factors. Competition, changing technology, changing needs etc. Any of these can put an end to the business.
2) Ability to spend time for personal life
3) Stress
4) Success Factors are low in many cases

The above mentioned are hard aspects. But there is one very critical baggage which this career option brings - which is

With success in entrepreneurship comes the difficulty in managing success. There is nothing that people like to see - more than to see someone high up - fall down. You always want Australia to lose a cricket match. You always prefer a Tata to a Reliance group. You always prefer an AR Rahman to any other musician. You prefer Tendulkar to Ponting. You prefer a Narayanamurthy to Azim Premji. You prefer a Kalam to any other politician.

Why?

The way these companies, teams, individuals manage success.

With success in entrepreneurship - comes the great responsibility of managing it right.

People always love to hear a scandal more than anything and it is human nature. A simple mistake on part of an entrepreneur is enough to put at risk the personal and professional relations.

Some qualities which look bad on a CEO or Entrepreneur are
1) Arrogance
2) Negligence
3) Disrespect for others
4) Show of wealth/power/fame

I am not saying that they would impact the CEO personally. It is just that others love to see such persons fail - and it is always not a good feeling to have for a CEO.

People always love a Warren Buffet to a Richard Branson.

Both are successful. But I enjoy to see Buffet successful while I think "man - God has been kind to this Branson"

What I think does not matter to Branson. But I would personally want to be a Buffet and not a Branson.

World of Warcraft

2010-05-13T07:15:00.000-07:00

This amazing game from Blizzard has me hooked for the past few months.

This article might not really make sense to many of you ... but for those of you to who it does - heres some of my learnings from the game

Call this my own personal WOW Guide if you may....

I have levelled up a hunter to level 80 and a priest to level 77 as I write this article - and I also have a few mid level characters....and here are my general do's and donts for the game

So here goes....

Game Aids

1) Please get the relevant addons for the game...especially get yourself Questhelper and Auctioneer addons. These are quite useful and you can do so much better with these addons

2) Get a wide screen monitor - the game experience is really much better the bigger your screen. Believe me. I had used a small monitor before and now I use a big one and I love it...

3) I play in Windowed mode. That way - I know if someone pings me in Gtalk or something while I play :). Choose your preference! Some like their screens filled up...but I like it this way

Gold Making

I dont consider myself a great gold maker in WoW or something - but there are some fundamental things you can do - to make gold in WoW. Some of these are very simple things which anyone will know once they play the game for sometime

1) First and foremost thing you want to do - is to forget all those stupid crafting professions. I mean all of them. ALL OF THEM.

Be a miner/skinner or herb gatherer at the starting levels. This is especially true for your first character in a realm/faction.

However tempted you may be to roll a leatherworking profession since you are a hunter or an engineering profession to get that cool bike ride - it is not worth it.

Crafting professions give you value (if at all) only VERY VERY VERY late in the game - and that too - the value can always be purchased. For levelling up your leatherworking from say 1-450 you will easily spend a hell of a lot of money and time which can easily be spent gathering stuff and making money.

Take my case - my leatherworking is now at 441 (my character can bee seen here)

Even with skinning as my primary profesion - I still need Artic Furs, Primal Fire/Water/Shadow etc. / and Orbs and what not - in order to level - and not a single crafted item that I am wearing is made by me.

I never even found anything worth selling - maybe a few armor kits here and there - and a few of the items which are used by disenchanters. Hardly worth the effort I put into L/W. End of the day - it did not make me money and it did not make me anything worth wearing.

Had I taken a mining profession - I would be riding an epic mount by now and still had the same gear I am wearing.

The highest gear items - are almost 90% available only on 10/25 man dungeons in PVE and by playing Arenas for PVP. You dont craft them. So what is the point of a crafting profession?

This is seriously an area where I See that Blizzard needs to add more value for people to actually make value from taking a crafting profession.

So - be a miner/skinner/herba.

Personal preference would be miner/skinner or herba/skinner (you hunt animals often you might as well skin them and since ores share the minimap with herbs - you dont usually get too many of them anyways)

Sell any crap you mine/herb/skin and you are easily making money in no time. I started a character with these professions now and I am comfortably making good money even in level 20.

If at all you choose not to listen to my advice and want to roll a crafting profession - be a Tailor. Netherweave Bags are a good source of money and later Frostweave bags. My other character is making good money off of tailoring.

Thus far Enchanting hasnt made much money for me - maybe I am just not spending enough time Disenchanting to make money. I need to investigate.

But if there were any advice I were to give on Gold making - it would be roll a gathering profession. No matter how high a level you reach - you can always use the gold.

2) My second tip on gold making is the Auction house. There are some simple rules in auction house

a) Sell what people want -
nobody wants a stupid Green item (except maybe enchanters) which is priced above 4G. You get better items in a random dungeon run
nobody wants a 6 or 8 or 14 slot bags...they want what they cant buy off the vendor.
nobody wants vendor trash - so dont sell it
Money is almost 80% of the time to be made off items which are "Raw Materials" to a profession/item. It is very rarely to be made of Actual items. Learn to identify raw mats
Stop making frostweave bandages after you hit level 80. The frostweave cloth in my realm sells 4G a stack - you are better off selling it than making bandages

b) Sell competitively - just because somoeone just put up a frostweave bag for 10G a piece - does not mean you have to jump on it and sell it at 9 G. Wait for the item to get sold and then resell in the market price. Patience is a virtue. Some noob idiots will always sell stuff at a value much less than what an item is worth. Dont waste your time and energy trying to undercut noobs. It is not worth it.

c) When you undercut someone - undercut sensibly

If the cheapest price in AH is currently 10G 99S 99C for an item, you only need to price it at
10G 99S and 98C to undercut him/her

Dont be a noob and take the price to 9G...that is just plain silly. Not only are you losing 1G 99S 98C but you are in effect bringing the market itself down drastically

3) The third tip to gold making is to farm

a) Farm for fish - there is a lot of money to be had by selling raw fish in the market. Whenever you are just plain bored to do anything else - go fish yourself to money. It doesnt matter which level you are. You can always fish and sell what you catch.

b) Farm for leather - a good place is Gundrak Raptors near Zuldrak - they give you 2-3 Borean leathers a kill. I cant think of any other place where you can get 2-3 Borean leathers in 1 kill. In an hour I create 200 Borean leather which is roughly 40 Heavy Borean Leather - each of which is easily worth 8-10G - which is 300-400 gold per hour

c) Farm for Emblems - you can convert them into Orbs which sell for good money in the AH.
4) (applicable to level 80s - who can easily get a lot of Emblems of Triumphs)

4) Dailies - Especially once you are level 80. They give you 13G and 23S per daily. You can do 25 of those. Argent tournament grounds and areas in Icecrown (shadow vault) have dailies which can all be finished in 1-2 hours and would fetch 13G 23S per quest and you can do 25 of those every 1-2 hours. This is easily 331 G in just the quest reward - plus you get to loot the corpses which would separately yield another 100-200G worth of items and you get to skin the kill sometimes, not to mention the occassionaly mining/gathering which you do in the process (if you are a miner). This is one of the fastest ways to earn money in the game.

5) Be Sensible.

Yes.

Be Sensible.

You dont need a heavily overpriced gun in the AH - which would cost you 10G and you are in your level 10 - just entering the WSG battles . You are much better of saving that money for your first mount. Remember the epic flying mount and Artisan Riding skill - they take a ton of gold. Also - you need to save for your skill learning/profession levelling/travel/repair etc.

Resist the urge to make unnecessary purchases in the AH.

A simple rule of thumb you can use is - never make a purchase which is than XX% your bank balance (until you are level 80 or are making the purchase because you ABSOLUTELY ABSOLUTELY MUST) and you should be fine.

You can decide the XX suitable for you. I would recommend 20-30%.

Social Tips

1) Please learn to be polite. It is very important that you are polite to people. Dont go shouting "noob &£$% idiot" if someone accidentally does not heal you - or you die because of a fault in a dungeon group.

Everyone makes a mistake.

This is just a game. Its not as if you got really killed or something. You can always respawn and get back into the game

2) If you are a Tank/Healer in a dungeon group - it is very important you dont just ditch the group because you got a stupid dungeon or because the group is not keeping pace with you. DPSers are easy to find. But not a tank or a healer. So before you roll as a Tank/Healer - think about if you are serious about doing a dungeon - or if you might go for a bathroom break and not come back.

3) Always inform the group the buffs you need when you need

4) Watch for mana breaks (mb) and dont just keep running and killing everything in a dungeon

5) Dont "Need" when you dont "Need" an item

6) To sum up - just dont be a jerk and dont show off.

Gear

1) maxdps.com is a good site. Use it to identify the right gear

2) Gearscore addon is quite good. Use that as well.

3) The path to a good gear needs patience. I would suggest you start off with the 5 man dungeons and slowly move to 10-25 man once the gearscore is decent (say 4K + )

4) Join a good raiding guild and take part in the weeklies

5) End of the day it is just Gear and Skill which matter in WoW. Gear is something you surely can improve quite easily and you better work on it.

6) Make sure you Enchant/Socket and use all your Glyphs when you have the money to do so. Currently my characters lack the enchants - and I am still working on it - (not sure if I want to enchant tier 9 gear or want to wait to get to tier 10 and enchant it once and for all)

Seasonal Contests

1) Take part in the seasonal games and also on the Fishing tournaments. Some of the items they reward like the Darkmoon cards/the ring from the Kaluak fishing etc. are very useful items to win.

2) Easy money and easy way to gain levels as well.

PVP

1) PVP is different from PVE. Learn the essential differences.

The most critical one would be your gear changes. You need more +sta and +resilience items in a PVP scenario - as it is more important that you live first. Only if you live you can tank/heal/dps.

2) In a PVP scenario - be realistic. Dont try to be a hero. If you are Horde, dont think you can take on 5 allys of the same level as you.

You can't. Period.

Go in groups in Battlegrounds. Unity is strength. You go alone - and you will soon spawn in the nearest graveyard.

I am not saying be a coward. All I am saying is it is better to live and win another day than to die brave and lose the bg.

There are no honor points for dying bravely in battle. You will only be sitting and doing nothing.

3) If you are in a flag carrying scenario (EOTS or WSG) - allow a player well equipped to carry it - if it is possible. A well equipped player is - ideally a druid who can shapeshift and run quickly or a tank who can take tremendous punishment before dying or a mage who can teleport quickly. If you are a hunter/priest/lock/rogue etc. it is maybe better of if you wait unless you have a very good idea of what you plan to do.

If you are a priest - and you do take the flag - keep your shield up all the time - and cast dispersion/use trinket wisely to get out of a stun/lock situation

If you are a hunter - use the Mark of Wild to give you boost to run speed and cast deterrence at the right time

Locks/Rogues - Try to stay away from flag as much as possible

4) If you are a caster - behave like one.

You strength is in staying away and causing damage. Dont be a fool and run into the enemy.

5) If you are a tank/melee - dont waste any time getting to the squishies

Rogues - Please learn to stealth well...that is the key to your success

6) In an Arathi basin - dont keep turtling. The moment you have 3 bases - stick to it unless absolutely necessary. Defend wherever you are and dont keep running up and down. A win gives more honor than you killing a lot of them and losing.

7) In WSG - once you pick up the flag - be sensible. Keep your allies close. And take your time to reach your base. You dont get brownie points for running back with the flag within 2 minutes (unless you are aiming for the 3-0 achievement in 7 minutes). Take your time. Find where your allies are. Choose the right path to run. Use the boosts within the small huts outside the tunnels. Get the fast move boost if possible. But most of all - dont just keep running. It is better to sometime stay back fight and then run.

Example - a level 71 hunter is attacking you and you are a level 78 pally. Take your time. Go kill the hunter. Then start running. If you keep running - you will keep losing HP. It is better to sometimes just fight and get it over with and then run.

8) In EOTS - Towers are more important than the flag. 3 towers al the time - and you win. You dont need any flag. First make sure you have 2 each defending a tower and only then go to the center.

10) In SOA - take out the tanks and machines. Concentrate more on them than on the players

PVE

1) In PVE - you need to have the gear which matches with what you are trying to do. A dps does not need a +sta or +resi at the cost of AP/Crit chance

2) PVE - dont pull the crowd which you cannot handle.

3) Learn what to do in different dungeons - this only comes with experience. But more importantly - if someone does not know what is the tactic - either educate him./her or be patient with them. Remember - there was once a time when you were new to the dungeon and someone else was patient with your "noob"ness

Levelling

1) In order to level quickly there are some basic rules

Always - pick all quests in a particular area and finish them. dont take 1 quest in Grizzly hills, 1 in borean tundra, 1 in crystalsong forest and 1 in icecrown and keep running up and down. Take 8 quests in same area and do it all in 1 go

2) Use questhelper

3) Always level in a region where the quests are closer to your level (quest color in the quest log should atleast be yellow). Abandon quests which have become grey/green

4) I have found dungeons to be one of the fastest ways to level. Always queue up for a dungeon and spend most of your time levelling in dungeons - they give good items/money and levels

5) Keep an alt for banking/selling/storage - and mail all items to the alt (or mule). Dont waste time running back and forth from Dalaran to Ogrimmar just to sell some stuff in AH

6) Remember to go to Outland/Northrend as soon as you hit level 58/68. Dont waste your time in Kalimdor/Eastern Kingdom doing nonsense runs which give you half the experience and practically useless items as compared to that in Outland/Northrend.

End of the day - remember. It is just a game. Enjoy it. Bring your friends to it. But always remember to spend enough time outside of it!

Cheers
cb

Why we like or dislike a movie?

2009-07-20T22:43:00.000-07:00

I gave a very bad review to the Tamil movie "Achchamundu Achchamundu" and subsequently got spit on by 2 anonymous users of the internet who thought the movie was good. Their comments actually got me wondering as to why is it that sometimes we like a movie and sometimes we do not.

Many a times we find that a movie has received rave reviews and we rush to the theatres but we end up hating the movie. At other times we read dumb movie reviews and then find that the movie was really good.

In fact, the tamil movie which I mentioned in the below post - on hind sight - was not very bad. It is just that I was expecting a "thriller" - one which keeps me on the edge of my seat at all times - but the movie did not do that - and subsequently I failed to see some of the good aspects of the movie - such as , no thoppulla pambaram stuff, very naturally taken movie, atleast some concept which is not again and again based on puppy love, no "there has to be 5 song sequences and hence I am force fitting a dream song when the hero sees the heroine for the first time" nonsense etc. Movie was actually a matured, soft and easy on the brain one.

It was then that I realized that a movie gets a bad/good review based on the expectation you had from the movie before you saw it. If a lot of people say it is a "great" movie, then your expectation is already raised. So if the movie is not downright legendarily awesome, you think "Ah well..it was ok". However, the moment someone gives a movie a bad review and then you watch it , your expectations are already lowered, and then you find that the movie was "ok", but then its all relative. From a bad -> ok, you tend to think that the movie was actually good.

This has happened to me many a times. I saw this movie "Thenkasipattanam" in tamizh. First time I saw it I laughed so hard, saliva came out of my nose. I recommended it strongly to all my family members, relatives etc. I gave such rave reviews which made them think it was the best movie ever. But after they saw the movie they literally scolded me. They were sorely disappointed :(...

I guess it is because I had raised their expectation so much - that the movie sucked.

I guess, in order to enjoy/appreciate a movie with the right spirit, one should go and watch the movie first and then read the reviews next and then compare and contrast. The moment we read some review, there is a chance we get biased.

That apart, another reason why we sometimes like or dislike a movie is because we might not be in the right mood to appreciate it. If you watch it after a tough day at office, or when you are really sad about something, or when you are busy thinking about something else, even a "Titanic" would seem worser than "Thali Katha Kali Amman". However, when you are in the right mood, and watching a movie with the right crowd, even a "Yarukku Yar Stepni" will seem like "Michael Madana Kama Rajan"...

So there it goes, ... the perception of a movie is largely dependant on
1) Expectation
2) Mood

That said -> in spite of the expectation/mood - a movie has to also be good :)...a director cannot simply get away with a movie like "Boom" or "Kambakht Ishq" hoping for all the audience to come with a bad expectation and great mood. :)...

Until the next post
ciao
yours truly

Achchamundu Achchamundu - Movie Review

2009-07-20T00:10:00.000-07:00

You know the moment in a movie when you start really concentrating and the plot begins to unfold after the basic introductions are over...well...such a moment never came and the movie ended.

The only bright spot about the movie was that I watched it with my fiancee and hence had enough time to look at her instead of the screen. So in case you plan to take out someone special to a movie not to watch the movie but instead to spend time with that special someone, then this is the movie for you.

All others, please dont waste your time.

They called the movie a thriller. There was not even one scene where my grandma with a weak heart can watch the movie and even wink her eye in fear.

Actually, there was really NOTHING in this movie. Finally the director puts a lot of fundas about child molestation facts and figures which runs so quickly, you just understand that child molestation is going on in the world and it has to be stopped.

Worstoworst movie. Uvack@#$.

What to say the first time you meet her?

2009-07-15T00:00:00.000-07:00

In an arranged marriage, it is always trouble, when you think of what to say or expect when you meet him/her for the first time. I just thought I would pen down my thoughts on this, so that in case you are in such a situation, this may help you in a way. These are just the things I would do. They are in no way the best way to proceed or any kind of a guideline. It is just something you might want to give a thought to before you meet him/her.

1) Be very honest in the initial few meetings and let him/her know what to expect - so that there are no surprises or skeletons in the closet later on

2) Make the expectations very clear - eating/ settling in India/abroad , parents - who is gonna stay with who and for how long etc.

3) Talk about hobbies and friends - this will go a long way in finding the compatibility

4) Be prepared for receiving a NO from the other side - always better now, than later

5) And the most important of all - be prepared to say "No". You dont want to say "yes" to a jerk just because of parental pressure, pressure of having been in the process of a spouse search for too long or because of hurting the other person. Remember, this is arranged marriage. It does not mean the first guy/gal you meet is "the one"

Hope this helps...

The Wonder that is called Woman

2009-07-10T00:22:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer : Ya ya ... I have to start with one when it is a controversial topic :D

0) Adult material. Kids please go away. Parents be warned.
1) The below is just for fun - all ye Womens Liberation Front leaders...no comments please...this is for fun
2) It does not in any manner seek to demean or insult any of the women folk. I just love them too much. They are Awesome. They are Legendary. I can't live without them.
3) Women are better than men. Period.
4) I am a feminist. Go ladies.
5) (Menfolk, please note that I am committed, and hence I have to give this disclaimer. Please do not get angry with me. If you are married/committed yourself you will understand why I say so. If you are single and not Gay, then maybe someday you will)

After having a lot of fun @ office about the classic men vs. women debate, I thought I will pen down some of the things I have always wondered about women.

(if you are reading this and you are my fiancee then this does not apply to you)

1) I have always wondered about the contents of a womans purse - my guess is it has some sticker pottu (bindis), a nail polish, a smalll mirror, a lipstick, an eyeliner, a comb, some more make-up items, a smalllll kerchief and a wallet (which conveniently will have only their bus pass and Rs. 10 for emergency situations (what if they lose the bus pass - they have to get home no).

2) Women have all the fun in the world

- You have separate Buses for them
- You have separate lounges in railway stations for them
- You have reservation for women
- You have separate railway coaches for them
- You have a Womans day
- You are arrested if she complains to the cops that you whistled at her (even if you were in fact whistling at the hot chic standing next to her)
- A woman can coo-chi-coo another woman, kiss her and do all kindsa stuff (which we want to do to a woman too), but if a guy does that to another guy - YUCK...the thought of doing it is itself enough to make you a gay

3) I find women very complex.

No seriously.

Men - we just need a few basic stuff - food, sex, sleep and sports. If we have that, then we are happy.

But what makes a woman happy? - you give them money, then they want attention. You give them attention, then they want to be called pretty. You call them pretty then they ask if the think the other hot chic is prettier. You say no and then they still suspect you. You say you love them and they ask if you love them more than Cricket. You say yes and they still suspect you. You give them sex, and they like to rather talk before/after the sex. You give them food and they say they will get fat. You don't give them food they say that we dont care. Ask them if they want to watch football and they say it is not a girls sport. Ask them if they want to play barbie they say "how male chauvunist of you"

Chris Tucker once said very truly. A woman wants "EVVVVVERRRRRYYYYTTTHHHING". Believe him dudes. She does.

4) I have always wondered if God has a separate pair of eyes for Men and Women.

The colors I know are, Blue,
Red, Yellow, Green, White and Black. And the dark and light versions of these.

The colors a woman knows are - Dark Blue, Light Blue, Peacock Blue, Ajanta Blue, Raama Blue, Navy Blue, Ocean Blue, Sky Blue.....(ok so you got the point)....

5) When we pick a shirt we check the color, the style and price and make the purchase.

Approximate time of shopping = 3-15 minutes
Approximate average Cost - Rs. 1000

When girls pick a dress - they check the color, the style, the price, is this better than the one their neighbor wore in the last party, is this dress going to show them as slim, is this "value for money", have we spent atleast 5 hours in this shop, would a salwar be better for the occassion or would it have to be a sari or a jeans and t-shirt or a skirt, is it too conservative, is it similair to one of the 1000 dresses I already have

Approximate time of shopping - 8 hours (and 23 headaches later, for the guy)
Approximate average cost - A large hole in his pocket

6) Guys check out girls - ok so that we know
Girls also check out girls - :( ...I recently learnt this guys.
And yes, they check-out the exact same things that we do. Ya, you know what I mean.

7) Why do they always have to ask the following dreaded questions (DQ in short)
- "Do I look fat?"
- "Do I look pretty?"
- "Is she more beautiful than me?"
- "Does this dress look good on me?"
Do you ever spot a dude popping "Hey baby. How does this Jeans look on my ass?" question? How about a dude asking "Do you think I am more intelligent than that geeky boy"
We don't ask such questions because we already know the answer.

One piece of advice to dudes - when you get suddenly hit by a DQ, you have the following options
- Quickly run to the bathroom and pretend to stay there till she forgets that question
- Practice Spontaneous Lying at the face - believe me, this is useful - you should not even blink - you think and you are screwed...you need to be so quick at answering these questions, that she should not think that you have even "considered" "thinking" that "she is fat" or that "she is not pretty"
- Cry and then divert the topic
- Speak the truth - And subsequently get clobbered.

8) Its ok if a girl says "She was selected in the interview because she had great racks"
It is not ok if a guy says the same. :(

9) I wonder Which is faster - Speed of light or the speed of a gossip travelling from the girl who is your best friend to the girl you hoped never finds out about it?

Seriously dudes, if it is a secret, Keep it.
IF you want the world to know, then tell any girl.

10) After being such an honest person they call me a male chauvunistic pig. I wonder why.

Yours Truly

Fun @ Office

2009-07-07T23:43:00.000-07:00

One of my office colleagues sent us a forwarded email which contained the laws for women. The email is as follows
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Laws for Women
1. Go for younger men. You might as well - they never mature anyway.
2. Don't imagine you can change a man - unless he's in diapers.
3. What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? You shut the door.
4. If we put a man on the moon - we should be able to put them all up there.
5. Never let your man's mind wander - it's too little to be out alone.
6. Men are all the same - they just have different faces so that you can tell them apart.
7. Definition of a bachelor: a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.
8. Women don't make fools of men - most of them are the do-it-yourself types.
9. Best way to get a man to do something: suggest he's too old for it.
10. Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.
11. If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.
12. The children of Israel wandered in the desert for 40 years. Even in biblical times, men wouldn't ask for directions.
13. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him chequebooks.
14. Remember: a sense of humour does not mean you tell him jokes; it means you laugh at his.
15. Sadly, all men are created equal (wether macho or not, intellectual or not, dump or not, etc or not etc)

--------------------------------------------------------------
My response to that email was as follows:

The logic behind the Laws for Women however, is as follows

1) Go for younger men – because women are immature
2) Don’t imagine you can change a man – perfection cannot be improved
3) What do you do if your boyfriend walks out – truth is you cry
4) If we put a man on the moon – he would live happily ever after
5) Never let your man’s mind wander – because women need to have the attention all the time
6) Men are all the same – they are all perfect
7) Definition of a bachelor – lucky bastard
8) Women don’t make fools of men – we are way too intelligent to get fooled by them
9) Best way to get a man to do something – say please (dropping a pen also has effects sometimes)
10) Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye opener – could not agree more (for men)
11) If you want a committed man look in a mental hospital – ya, you got to be mental to get committed to a woman
12) The children of Israel wandered in the desert for 40 years. The girl children of Israel wandered in the desert for 80 years. Even in Biblical times women never listened to men.
13) If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him chequebooks. – is this an insult for a man or a woman?
14) Remember: a sense of humour does not mean you tell him jokes; it means you laugh at his – provided you have enough brains to understand it (remember the donkey joke?)
15) Sadly, all men are created equal (whether macho or not, intellectual or not, dump or not, etc or not etc) – in spite of which women are always wanting the other girls boyfriend

Contributions from Harish also went into the above reply! :D

A story that touched me

2009-07-05T21:39:00.000-07:00

I had a visual treat on Friday evening when one of our office colleagues performed for us. He works in the HR Department of our company and he takes care of giving us our payslips. He is very calm and cheerful person and the last man you expect to possess the talent that he displayed to us.

He broke 10 bricks set on fire with his bare hands and he broke an ice slab with his head. When I went to congratulate him on what he did, he said that it was all childs play for him and that he wanted to give a much more grander performance. He has had a tempo traveller and a bus run over him and cause not even a scratch.

While he is a World Martial Arts member and 2nd Dan at Seisho Kai Shito , has some Guiness book of records to his name and has learnt pretty much all there is to martial arts, he is, unable to pursue his true passion. For reasons of familial pressure has stopped practicing his art. Meet our very own Sr. Executive Compensation and Benefits, K. Natarajan of Salem.

His family stands justified in that they want him to be safe (a couple of family members met with serious permanent damage while practicing this art). His family is concerned about his welfare while he is concerned about his passion.

I was truly moved by this mans story.

I humbly salute to his talent and I hope he is happy in the end no matter what the path he chooses.

I have seen it in the movies where the Hero does not get to do what he "really" wants to do and parents/in-laws put pressure on him to pursue something else (Arjun in Mudhalvan studies for joining a Government job because Manisha Koiralas dad wants him to have a stable job, when he is a TV reporter who could have had the Government itself in his hands).

I have not met too many such people in real life. This is one such man who had multiple offers in the area of martial arts, but had to finally settle for a life very different to the one he dreamed of.

When I think of this man I am reminded of the advertisement in Monster.com where a cricketer uses his bat to wash clothes, and a dancer is showing signs to an aircraft etc.

I really do not know what I would do if I were in his place. When you have your family and passion conflicting with each other, it is a real tough choice to make! I hope things pan out well in the end for Natarajan and I wish him all the very best.

Your story really touched me.

Pallavan Luxury Buses

2009-06-02T19:12:00.000-07:00

As I was travelling on my way back to Bangalore after my usual weekend trip, my dad dropped me at the Saidapet Bus Stand. I got onto an A18 "sogusu perundhu", or luxury bus.
I have never consciously differentiated between a luxury bus and a regular bus or for that matter an AC bus (a ticket in a luxury bus might be Rs. 8 to a place X from Y and in a regular bus it might be Rs. 5 and it might be Rs. 15 in an AC bus).

I would think a bus is a bus, and why should it matter. To me, taxi was a luxury, auto was a semi-luxury and a bus was something which was the cheapest form of transport. Earlier in buses, they used to have green colored pallavan buses which were of 2 types - LSS and regular. LSS used to be a limited stop service and tickets were slightly costlier.

Anyways,as I was purchasing my ticket, I saw a lady (who is definitely below poverty line, judging from her attire).

She told the conductor

"Enna ya, ippo ellam verum sogusu perundhu dhaan vidarenga. Romba kashtama iruku. Sadha bus varave matengudhu. Ethana nerama nikka vendiruku?"
(Translate: "These days the bus company is only running luxury buses and there are hardly any regular buses to be seen even if we wait for a long time")

When I heard that conversation was the first time I really felt that there are so many people in this country to whom a Rs. 3 increase in a bus fare could really cause a pinch and make them pick a fight with the conductor. For these people these buses are really a "luxury". To me it made no difference what bus it was. But to her, and the countless people like her it does.

Topic apart, what I dont understand however, is that the last UPA government had one of the worst streaks of inflation and petrol price hikes etc. How did they get re-elected in spite of that, and that too with such overwhelming majority (given the considerations)? :)

"Oh you are from IIM- you must be earning in crores?"

2009-06-01T07:15:00.000-07:00

This is the first thing I hear whenever someone hears that I am from IIM B. I do not know who I hate more - the person who pops this stupid question or the newspapers which mention all sorts of things painting a rosy picture about the IIMs.

First of all, an income of USD 100000 is not equal to f***ing Rs.50 lakhs. There are things like taxes, cost of living, purchase power parity and so on. So if some IIM grad is getting paid in foreign currency, then it is bound to appear like a huge deal when converted into Indian currency.

Believe, me, in India, you DONT get paid in crores unless you are in the board of directors of a company or some senior vice president.

Instead of converting the dollars/pounds to rupees, lets all do this. We will all go to Vietnam and convert the dollars there to the local currency Dong (present conversion is 1 USD = 17700 Dongs). So the Vietnam newspaper would report - "IIM grad gets Vietnam Dong 3 billion as salary. IIM Grads are billionaires.".

Calling us as crorepatis right now is as absurd as a Vietnamese calling an IIM grad a trillionaire.
Second,

What kind of a dumb mannerless (DM in short) idiot will you be to ask someone "Hey what is your salary?"

2 things you should never ask are, a woman her age and a man his package(we mean all packages btw). They just hate it when you do. So if you are reading this and you have already asked someone his/her salary, then you are a dumb mannerless idiot. If you havent, then dont be one.

Ok, now to the more interesting thing.

Ever since the recession started, all the people I meet seem to get some sadistic pleasure in popping the same "DM question" to me. They hope against all hope that I will cut a sorry puppy dog face and complain that this year the placement season was bad and that I landed up in a company where even my driver would not have joined last year. In case I reply in the same manner then they are elated. Their day is made. (remember, they are still wiping the same table but the fact that I am wiping the next table after coming out of IIM, makes them doubly happy)! What dumb mannerless sadists!

Oh man!, reminds me of a joke

It is Queen Elizabeths birthday and our dear Santa and Banta decide to take her a gift. Santa takes a bag full of coconuts and Banta takes a bag full of betel nuts. Once they reach the palace, they find that everyone has bought diamonds and gold and other jewellery as gift to the queen when our two dumbos have taken a really stupid gift. This infuriates the queen and she asks the guards to shove the nuts into their asses.

They get dragged off, and as the betel nuts are being shoved into Bantas ass, he keeps laughing. The guard is surprised and asks "Hey Banta, we are shoving these Betel nuts in your ass, and how is it that you are not in pain and are laughing?"

Banta says, "The mere thought that Santa is getting a bucket load of coconuts into his ass makes me feel so happy"
So if you are Banta - here is my reply to you

"This year also IIMs had a 100% placement record. The average salary has not gone down. The profile of the companies coming to the IIMs are different this year compared to last. However, everyone is well placed, and in very plum jobs - the kind of job your mom and dad want you to be in. So stop popping the stupid dumb ass mannerless questions and get back to work."

Jokes apart,

The times are bad. Everyone knows it. It is basic decency that you do not ask embarassing questions to a person who is already not in the place he/she would have ideally wanted to be. People eventually reach their goals - wherever they be. Please do not embarass a student from an IIM just because the times are bad. Remember, that any day, you yourself would want to study in such colleges if you had the opportunity. Before you make fun of a student from IIM - think for a moment what you would give to study in such an institution and then pass the comments.

In fact, what you are doing is really "Sour Grapes" - I do not want to sound arrogant here that I am from an IIM. However, there are so many instances in my life, where people say things like "you are from an elite institution, is this how you behave, is this how you blah, is this how you boo". We are also humans first. Secondly, we have proven our capabilities in many a sphere to be where we are. We are proud of what we are but not arrogant. If you are not where we are, then it does not make you any less special. So stop treating yourself like you are less special.

I can only speak for myself. I have met some of the most brainy people in the world at IIM B. I have worked the hardest in my 2 years there. I have put as many night outs as I have never in my life before. I have slogged so hard, that hard work is now a habit for me and for my 250 batchmates. It is not without merit that Sachin is who he is, Abdul Kalam is who he is and an IIM is what it is.

So finally, the lessons we have learnt today - in case you are one of those dumb mannerless idiot are:

1) Dont ask someone his/her salary and about how the placements were in his/her college

2) Dont laugh at someone because he/she is in the same misery as you. Instead you try to get out of your misery (you might want to think of Banta here)

3) Dont cry sour grapes

Lost

2008-08-05T21:36:00.001-07:00

On my way back from Chennai after my short break mid-term, I was in the Central Railway
Station. I was purchasing a Pista roll in Ananda bhavan as an after dinner snack when I
saw this young kid (about 6-7 years old) crying and walking here and there. There was half
of me that felt, "ok so the kid is crying, and it is none of my business, his parent is
probably around or the kid knows his way around". There was this other half of me that
felt that something is wrong. I felt that the kid was missing his parent.

Maybe he felt that I am a stranger and hence he chose not to answer me, but he kept crying
and was walking here and there. I had a lot of time left for my train and so I decided to
follow him just in case. On the way I tried speaking to a few people in uniform (both
railway and regular police) informing them that this kid is going here and there and
seems lost. They showed a slight amount of interest, but then not the amount that made
them stop what they were doing and walk upto this kid and take care of him.

After talking to 3 such uniformed guards who pretty much did nothing about this, I decided
I will take the matter to my own hands.I Kept following the crying kid who finally went
outside the station and sat on the bonnet of a red maruti. There I spoke to him, this time
in english, and he answered (maybe he did not get my tamizh the first time).

He told me his dad was missing and that his dads name was Ashok. I asked for the dads number
and gave him a call. He came quickly to his car and gave his boy a sound thrashing. After that
then he gave him a big hug. The hug was worth the chase.

At the end of the story, I had a few lessons

1) Please teach your kid your name and telephone number. Make sure they by-heart it.
It is extremely useful.
2) Although the kid wouldve most probably gotten back to his dad without my intervention,
I just thought, what if,
a) The kid lost the way and did not know where his dad/or his car was
b) The kid does not know the dads number
c) There are some malicious elements that are looking at a crying kid
in a railway station. What if they sprang to action before I do...

There are so many kids that end up where they should not, because we donot take action
or we leave these things unnoticed as we are pre-occupied with our own life.

At the end of the day, it is worth seeing the smile on the parents
face (that comes after they give a sound beating to the kid of course :))...

Another day...another lesson :)

Mumbai

2008-05-19T21:43:00.000-07:00

Hmm, been wanting to write this since I landed here...but kept postponing the article until I learn better about this place.

When I landed, I had so many mixed feelings about this place. A few things made want to pull my hair off and scream while at few other times I was just awe-struck with my hair standing up on its own :).

Today, I have to admit. The place is lovely. You just have to like this place. Chennai remains my all-time favourite though :D (you see, me still that stupid person who likes a place because he has been there for most part of his life)...go Chennai Super Kings....

I know a lot of people have problems with Chennai...especially from the north, but to a Chennai-ite, the place is definitely one of the best places, if not THE best.

You just need to know Tamizh machan :) and you will love the place.

Enough about Chennai...back to Aamchi Mumbai

The bads first (so that I can leave you all with smile in the end with the goodstuff).

Traffic!!

Imagine a 10 way line (5 on each side). A proper Cement road which would last even the Mumbai rains. And this road has a mile long traffic Jam, on weekdays, weekends, national holidays, and even on my birthday.

And this is everywhere. I cross 3 Jam Points to reach my home. Thanks to the traffic, I reach after 1 hour (on an otherwise 15 minute journey), thoroughly exhausted with all the exposure to the noise pollution, air pollution and the auto/taxiwallas paan exploits.

This deserves a paragraph on its own. I think someone told these autowallas/taxi wallas that it is the paan that makes the road last longer. So they take it upon themselvesto contribute as much as they can. They seem to paint the town "red" alright.

In Mumbai it is the honking of the taxi and the autowallas that starts your day. Me thinks, the people on the road imagine that if they press the horn, the soundwaves that come out of the vehicle is somehow going to push the vehicle in the front with some unseen form of energy. ...honk! honk!

The Crowd

Can't stop asking "I wonder where all these people are going!"

Anywhere you go, there are atleast 50 people within your 20 metre radius.In the road, in the railway station, in the hotel, and yes in the washroom too. You need to wait for anything and everything and there is a queue anywhere and everywhere. The city happens to be the second most populous city in the world with about 1.3 crore people hoping to make a living here.

Picture this,
Saturday night 9.30. I want to go from Dadar to Mulund. Waiting for a fast train. Along comes a heavily loaded train with people spilling all over. Have you seen honeybees sticking to their comb...pretty much looked something like that.

I was waiting with all eagerness in my eyes hoping that some 400 people will get down from the coach in front of me so I could have some space to put one leg inside the train. Only 250 people got down. But with great daring (basically I was quite tired and gave a damn) I pushed everyone and scrambled inside.

And I thought this is the most crowded place on earth, when a college student told his friend "Hey, how come there is no crowd in the train today?", his friend says, "Today is Saturday night yar..thats why it is not crowded"

The Summer

I know that India (atleast most of it) has only 3 seasons. Summer. Hot Summer. Hottest Summer.Mumbai summer is definitely among the hottest summers I have seen. Being next to the ocean only increases the humidity and the sweat levels. By the time I reach the office I am thoroughly dehydrated and scramble for water.

The only place among the major metros where the summer has never been a problem isperhaps Bangalore. But there too it is getting a lot "hotter" these days (in allthe sense of the word).
Chennai comes close to Mumbai in being a horrible place to be during summer. In Hyderabad or Delhi you dont sweat much. You just break into sunstroke and die. Simple.In Chennai or Mumbai you take bath in your sweat every minute that you are out in the sun.

The Rentals

If your salary is not in 5 digits, please forget about renting any place within Mumbai. This is of course understandable as the place has so many people. The land prices are so crazily high, that had my grandpa purchased 1-2 grounds, in say, Powai back in the 70s (which was an undeveloped area during that time) with the money he wasted on Paan, I would not have had to work for a living.

Ok now enough crib about Mumbai.

The good things.

All said and done, Mumbai is perhaps one of those few places in the world, where you can be just about anyone from anywhere and still make a living here. Mumbai is a conglomeration of the world all under one city. (That sounded like I am a reporter. Shit! I need to improve :()

Food!

Basically you have a lot of places to eat here. If you are a non-vegetarian, consider this place a paradise. There is a lot of variety, from the roadside bhelpuri stall to the top class 7 star hotels, the place has just about everything you need.

Apart from this, there are so many things to eat here which are new to me (never been much to this part of India...). There is Vada Paav, Dhokla, Daabel, Misal,Usal...wow so many items to eat...

Another interesting thing to note is that a lot of these items I just mentioned are fast food items...I guess the fast paced life of Mumbai has helped evolve these food items...grab them and run...run...run fast or you will miss the "local" ("local" is the word they use for their suburban electric train)

True Professionals!

The people here are very professional. Believe me, this is the single most important thing that makes Mumbai what it is. Some of the hardest working people in the planet are in Mumbai. It is a "fighter" city in all the sense of the word. What I mean when I say this is that the Autowalla will return to you 1 rupee if the meter reads 99 and you give him a 100 (its actually 2 rupees, Mumbai meters have this strange ruleof "meter value - 1" as actual value). Thats professionalism! You go to any other city the autowallawould perhaps say "Sir, it is 17 rupees no, please round off to Rs. 20"

There is a sense of duty and urgency in everybodys faces. This is evident in the pace of their walk and the look on their faces. It speaks a lot about their hardwork and dedication to their work/career. The local trains only make them stronger, and stand the test of time better.

Tourism!

There are a lot of nearby places like Matheran, Mahabhaleshwar etc all within drive-able distance which offer excellent weekend relaxation points. Being next to the beach does seem to have a lot advantages.

Had a chance to go to Elephanta caves. I was stumped. It is a cave that was carved out in 2 century BC (ya when they had no electricity). Life size (even bigger) statues of Gods are carved out from the stones in the caves. The greatest thing about the place is the precision with which these idols have been carved out. Keep in your mind that they cannot afford to make a mistake while doing the carving (because they are not making a statue somewhere else and getting it here, but are making it then and there. Imagine, the sculptor is making a statue, a nose breaks :)...oops...the king is not going to be pleased is he! )

Bill Gates' software developers could take a leaf or two from these "bug-free" "developers"

The greatest tragedy is that some stupid rulers who captured these caves in between seem to have destroyed a lot of these statues. However, some of the structures are still in one piece. The place deserves a visit for sure.

Visit any of Alibaug, Manori beach etc and you will see the typical Konkan idyllic villages. The beaches here are quite different to the ones in the east coast. The sand is quite thick here and the waves seem to be a bit milder. This helps make nice sand castles and a perfect outing with your family.

The temples here are again quite different to the ones in Tamilnadu. Back in TN you would see huge temple complexes that spawn acres, and will be made of black stone (unpolished granite) and the vigrahas (statues) will be huge. There will also be easily 10-15 deities within a single temple complex. Here the temples seem to be mostly made of marble, and there is mostly just one main deity. I had a chance to go to Mahalakshmi temple and Sidhivinayak temple. Both were very nice temples.

I have one qualm about the Sidhivinayak temple. Fundamentally the concept of taking money to beat the queue seems to me to be a wrong practice. However, people like the Prime minister or VIPs who need more security/or have very less time, may be allowed to bypass the queue (again a highly subjective topic...but this is not my qualm). My qualm is that, no matter what practice you follow with respect to the queue, you should allow EVERYONE to see the deity from the same DISTANCE. In Sidhivinayak temple I had to see the deity from like 100 feet away while those who paid money got to get up close. This I felt was a bit unfair. I dont mind the queue, but let me see the deity closer.

Anyways, there are some very good temples in and around Mumbai and you definitely have to see them. I especially liked the Birla Mandir (both in Mumbai and the one in Alibaug).

The people!

The people here (though there are too many of them), seem to be extremely friendly and helpful (agressive and passionate about life too). There is a lot to be learned from them.Being here for a month or two would help you learn a lot (especially if you travel in a local train).

The business!

"Mumbai is the commercial and entertainment center of India, generating 5% of India's GDP[3] and accounting for 25 per cent of industrial output, forty per cent of maritime trade, and seventy per cent of capital transactions to India's economy (says wiki)

Mumbai is India's largest city. Mumbai serves as an important economic hub of the country, contributing 10% of all factory employment, 40% of all income tax collections, 60% of all customs duty collections, 20% of all central excise tax collections, 40% of India's foreign trade and 40 billion Rupees (US$ 1 billion) in corporate taxes."

I just sounded like Captain Vijayakanth thanks to wikipedia.

Sachin Tendulkar!

My idol was born and lives here.

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All in all, I have started to like this place a lot. I am sure that it takes a lot to convince a person coming from a very different culture, to make you like a place within such short span of time. Mumbai has definitely managed to do that. An excellent cosmopolitan and a must visit if I may say so.

After Chennai Super Kings, it is definitely Mumbai Indians who get my support!!!

Meaning of Life, Universe and Everything

2008-05-13T22:47:00.000-07:00

After being stuck with work for 8 hours (as mentioned in the article below), I decided to unwind.

The following kottal conversation took place between me and my master Rodulus Lordulus (circa 1981-...). Woodworm is at one of his hilarious best. Gets better as it progresses.

Rating : Adults only please. Not for the weak minded.

me: nandu
ennada busya
Rodulus Lordulus: solda
me: nothiing
me gaja vetti
so thought of bugging u
Rodulus Lordulus: hmm
me not vetti - but need to start work
me: hmm
machi what is the meaning of life da
Rodulus Lordulus: 42
me: why is it not 53?
Rodulus Lordulus: in a different number system. yes
me: no in decimal system why is it not 53
Rodulus Lordulus: wait wait - the meaning of life universe and everything is 42
so meaning of life = 42 - meaning (universe) - meaning (everything)
me: what is meaning(universe) and meaning(everything)
Rodulus Lordulus: meaning (universe) is being solved by string theory - we expect an answer in 2 years
meaning (everything) is "all the things"
since advaita says all things are one
me: but how will I subtract "all the things" from 42
Rodulus Lordulus: so meaning (everything) = 1
me: aaaah
so it is 42 - some answer I will get in 2 years - 1
Rodulus Lordulus: so we have 41 - meaning (universe)
so wait for string theory equations. solve for the equation u have the answer
me: what if string theory is proved wrong in the meantime?
Rodulus Lordulus: then u need to go back and frame a new theory
me: which is?
Rodulus Lordulus: The Rodulus Lordulus theory
me: which states
Rodulus Lordulus: who says universe outside = the universe inside you
so find the universe inside you
me: but universe outside is so big, and inside me is just my baniyan jetti and a few organs
how can they be same
the theory seems flawed
Rodulus Lordulus: no theory is flawed just because it seems unbelievable
me: prove the theory
Rodulus Lordulus: ok - according to hindu ancient mythology, which is the axiom for our understanding
universe is a fractal
which is empirically observed
so any small fraction of the universe resembles the whole
me: (groping for a dictionary...go on)
Rodulus Lordulus: so i choose one fraction - myself
and see the universe in me
me: but then that would mean that you and a donkey are same right?
Rodulus Lordulus: no the universe inside a donkey = universe inside me
if you put the outer covering of man and donkey on both sides of the equation
the equation is unbalanced

me: so basically you eat what a donkey eats..is that it?
Rodulus Lordulus: again - what you eat is irrelevant to the universe
me: what then o master balances the equation
Rodulus Lordulus: the balance is in you
you are your way the truth and the goal
see - this is how u become a guru
me: soI am the truth and I am the goal
then why are you not coming to me?
Rodulus Lordulus: yeah so do a penalty kick
thats because i am in the opposite goal
me: ok so let me summarize
the meaning of life is 41 - meaning(universe)
Rodulus Lordulus: yeah
me: and the meaning(universe) is myself
and i need to kick a football onto me
Rodulus Lordulus: no - wait
that needs to be proven
me: so it is 41 - football kick (yet to be proven)
Rodulus Lordulus: it could happen that you are your own football as well
so the moment you kick the ball, you could find a sharp pain in your butt
so people dont want to test it on themselves a lot
me: oh is that why there are so many ignorant souls?
Rodulus Lordulus: exactly!!!!!
ignorance is saving pain in the butt
or ignorace is a state of mankind where you dont take a call on the probability of having a pain in the butt
me: that clears so much...
what then is the purpose of life master?
Rodulus Lordulus: the purpose of life is to find if there is a butt to be pained
and then finding if there is a football
and then if both exists, if football = butt
and then having satisfied yourself, kicking the ball into the goal
and then seeing if the goal is the universe
me: so man keeps roaming to find the ball and the butt
Rodulus Lordulus: and then noting it in the scorecard and switch off the TV
me: which is essentially his purpose
Rodulus Lordulus: yeah exactly
which is why sometimes people get bewildered and say "Balls"
me: what did people way back in history do when there was no football
Rodulus Lordulus: which shows that there are too many balls in sight
every man is reminded of his balls
that is why god gave him two
he also gave him foot
me: master is it not vulgar to speak such words in front of a disciple
Rodulus Lordulus: it took mankind 10 million years to find out that he can actually kick an artifical ball - rather than his own thereby causing terrible pain
you are your own vulgarity
me: so to sum up the second part
man used to kick his balls till he found a football
but then the football = butt
Rodulus Lordulus: exactly
me: and he has to kick his butt instead with a footbal
which is his goal and this helps him uncover the purpose, meaning of life universe and everything subject to the Rodulus theory being proven right
Rodulus Lordulus: yeah

me: master why are you bothered about petty job when you are a self realized soul
Rodulus Lordulus: because self realization doesnt give bua (food)
u need bua also
me: then what does self realization give?
Rodulus Lordulus: one halo around your head
if there is a power cut in your home, you can use it

me: Thank you master, that will be all for today

Rodulus Lordulus: May the ball always be in your court

An Exercise in vain

2008-05-13T20:46:00.000-07:00

After reading this I decided I WONT let this stupid laptop be the end of my precious life.

I started to get up once every fifteen minutes to "relax" my muscles and did some stretches. I did some "hoo haa" pumping in the air and that cross legged (oh no you don't), exercise which you do for warm up.

My boss took notice. Thought I had no work to do.

Its been 8 hours since I did my last excercise or went for a cup of coffee :(

Vegetarianism for the growing world

2008-05-13T01:08:00.000-07:00

Was waiting for an article like this one which says "The Chinese are getting richer and, like their western counterparts, eating more meat, which in turn is spurring a surge in demand for foodstuffs to feed a growing population of pigs and other livestock. "

Pure economics would tell you that to create 1 KG of meat you need 10 KG of grain. Hence either the meat is priced 10 times that of grain or it is bound to happen in the near future. Prices of food have been on the "rice" :), and down the lane I guess it makes more sense to directly consume the rice yourself intead of feeding it to a pig and then eating the pig instead.

So all you tandoori chicken connoiseurs might just have to shell out more money or switch to panneer tikka masala instead :)

The Indian Government instead of inflation control tactics such as banning exports, giving out import licences, banning futures trading, sending the police to unearth `hoarding', hiking interest rates etc. , would do well to encourage vegetarianism :D hehehe....

I can almost hear P. Chidambu saying "All Saravana Bhavans and Pure Veg restaurants get a VAT waiver. Pure Veg restaurants to have a VAT of only 1% :D..."

Anyways, this is not in any way to hurt the sentiments of non-vegetarians...but just an economic point of view of mine in relation to being a non-veggie. If prices of chicken are going to continue to rise as given in this article, does it not make more sense to consume maize directly instead of feeding it to the chicken and then eating the chicken instead?

Anyways, I am predicting that down the lane the markets would decide for themselves the prices in such a way that vegetarianism is the way of life of the common man. Go free markets...

Jokes apart , as one of the comments below point out...the equation between veg food and non veg food is not going to be exactly 1:10...there are so many other parameters...

Just thought I could get away with a "pro veg" argument....but no....someone had to come and spoil it everytime :(

That thing they call IIM - Part one

2008-05-12T05:14:00.000-07:00

The last one year at an IIM has been one hell of a journey and cannot simply be covered in a blog article. So, what I am gonna do is make this a series and spread my life @ IIM over a set of articles.

Do I hear some groans? (Oh no not one of those stupid IIM/IIT stories again...)

Unfortunately it is. But you are a good person no? You won’t close this blog without reading it fully right. So stop complaining and start reading...

After four years of work experience, I must admit entering an IIM was scaring me a teensy weensy bit. My greatest fears came true when a few of the students ended up calling me "old"

:(... Hey come on, I am just 18 (I mean at heart)

Ok back to the story.

There are primarily 2 kinds of students at the IIMs. I will call them BF and SF (no no, its not what you think...)

BF stands for Big Fish and SF stands for Small Fish. (ya, I don’t want to use bad words in front of family audience see)

Ok, so what’s with the fish?

Big Fish
Before entering the IIM campus, the word "Derivative" vaguely reminded them of something that their math teacher was trying hard to push through their skull...

Was that dy/dx? arre chodo yar....
Small Fish

Derivatives are financial instruments whose value changes in response to the changes in underlying variables. The main types of derivatives are futures, forwards, options, and swaps.....ok enough there...

Big Fish
The third price they won in a fancy dress competition in their 8th class is one of their
resume bullet points

Small Fish
They are unable to find space in their one page resume for the international quiz competition
which they won last year

Big Fish
They attend classes to gain attendance

Small Fish
They attend classes to gain knowledge

Big Fish
They are serious when they say they haven’t prepared for the exam

Small Fish
They are serious when they haven’t prepared for the exam

Big Fish
Day zero of placements : They are probably sleeping till 1 o clock in the afternoon
and go in the evening to check out if their small fish friends have been placed

Small Fish
Day one and two of placements : They don’t know what to do and try to give moral support
to their Big Fish friends

So there you have it.

You are probably wondering why I decided to call them big fish and Small fish.
The logic is quite simple.

The Small fish are ones who are going to be "small fish in a big pond" (the pond being Mckinseys, BCGs and Goldmans and Lehmans where an IIM grad is perhaps just another guy among thousands of Wharton/Harvard and other IIM grads) while the big fish are going to be "big fish in a small pond" (the pond being some IT company or some other day 2 company which is more than glad to have them working for them)

Ok no judgment calls here. This is just a simple truth. Take a moment to digest it.

The ocean (IIM) is not just made of the small and big fishes, it consists of all kinds of sea creatures that swim and enjoy in the ocean, before taking a jump into a pond.

I for one am a dolphin and am a big fish (not the biggest though :( ).

Do I hear some protest?I am the author no? So I get to choose what I am. So don’t complain now. You pick some nice fish which you want to be called as.

So I guess, that should do with the intro. I would continue with this post later. Next time, I would be obviously talking about fishes, but would assume that you know what I mean when I say someone is small fish or a big fish? Ok? Now run along, go do that thing your boss asked you to do and stop wasting time reading blogs....

Mumbai's Autowalla Harikrishna Misra rocks

2008-05-06T20:52:00.000-07:00

My first encounter with him did not set off so well.

During my internship here at Mumbai, I have been going from Powai to Santa Cruz airport everyday for my work. I take an auto everyday and the rates usually are between Rs. 65-70. On one of the days, I took an auto and the meter read Rs.80, waaay before we even reached our place. There was a heavy traffic jam. I was quite irritated that the autowalla was using a wrong meter and hence I gave him the money, told him that the meter was way too high and I got down and angrily walked to my office.

Then the autowalla followed me and kept asking me to get onto the auto and told me that he would drop me off free of charge for the remaining distance. I thought his guilt was pricking him (as he used a wrong meter) and so he tried to pacify his guilt by dropping me.

I decided he is not getting away with his folly that easily and did not get on to the auto and kept walking.

A few weeks passed.

Today, I got onto an auto and after reaching the office, the meter read Rs. 75. I gave him the cash, and the

autowalla said "Sir, please tell me exactly how much it takes to reach here as you travel everyday in this route."

I said "It takes about Rs. 65-70"

Autowalla : "In that case please take back this Rs.5. You travel here often so you know better than the meter. The other day I brought you here and you got down and walked all the way as you felt the meter showed a very high value. That auto was not mine. It was a hired auto, neither is the auto I am driving today mine. I have informed the owner of that auto to check the meter the other day"!!!!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

2 important lessons learnt
1) Anger never yields a good result.
2) Never accuse without full information

Indias Response to Bush's remark

2008-05-06T06:09:00.000-07:00

US President Bush's remarks on rising food prices did not surprise me too much.
He is a dumbo who does not know half the time what he is speaking.
However, what surprised or rather annoyed me was that Indians (most of them atleast), were "denying" or atleast trying to "refute" what he was saying.
Why should we bloody deny what he says.

Our response should just be "Oh ya, so what? We are eating more food today. Is there a problem? If you have a problem go shove it up your ***. We dont care. Moreover, thanks for acknowledging the fact that we are finally on your mental map as a country that is not just about snake charmers."

Arranged Marriage

2008-03-10T05:45:00.000-07:00

I am back after a very long time. I am not sure if I would continue to blog. However, in light of some of my recent experiences I have been thinking a little about the concept of arranged marriage and as to why it is so successful.

Disclaimers as usual include,
1) This is not a debate of a love marriage vs. arranged marriage. Both have their own merits and demerits.
2) If after reading this you somehow feel that I have argued in "favor" of the arranged marriage concept then you are wrong. I have only highlighted the positives of arranged marriage.
3) I do not want drab comments that are similar to "you have to experience love so as to appreciate it".
4) There are exceptions to every compromise below. Exceptions do not make examples.
5) If you feel like tearing your hair and saying "no" to any of these compromises below, read point 4 again. Calm down. Drink some water. These are just my points of view. Take it or leave it.

Ok,

A few days ago I had a chat with a few of my friends on this topic and these are guys/gals who have seen quite a bit in their lives and have had their share of experiences on relationships. As the discussion went on, I began to wonder, what is it, that makes this concept of arranged marriage tick?

Before I go on, for those in the West who do not know anything about arranged marriages, please read this

This is what I could gather at the end of it the many discussions I had,

Before I go on to Arranged marriage, I would make an assumption. The assumption is that to make a marriage work, one has to make compromises. The lesser the number of compromises the easier it is to keep the marriage together. I may be entirely wrong in this assumption (i.e people may exist who keep making compromises to save their marriage, but I do not belong to this category and neither do most of the friends with whom I have talked to). By compromise, I do not mean silly ones like sleeping on the right side of the bed or eating in a restaurant of the other persons choice. I mean compromises which make you go against the way you have lived thus far in your life or are against your value system and make something in your stomach go uvack#@$@#.

That said, Arranged marriages work simply because there are very minimal compromises made in an arranged marriage. In an arranged marriage,

1) No compromise is made on the way of life - this includes your daily habits
2) No compromise need be made on food habits - Typically parents look for a match who is a vegetarian if you are a vegetarian and a non vegetarian if you are one
3) No compromise is made in religion/caste/community - whichever you have strong feelings for, pick that one
4) No compromise is made on regional traits - Mother tongue (which is important when you want to have a comfortable conversation with the other party). Try experimenting with some other language everyday and it is going to be one big compromise you make in your life
5) No compromise is made on Age - this is highly arguable, I do agree, but I believe that it is great to have a younger girl and an elder boy as a couple, with a gap of at least a couple or more years. The reasons are two fold. First of all men last longer physically in terms of sexual life than women do. Second reason is that the emotional reach of a woman is higher than a man of same age (arguable, but there are many scientific studies that say this, and I too kind of go with this)
6) No compromise made on physical appearance - You always can say "no" in an arranged marriage if you think the guy/gal is not up to your expectations
7) No compromise made on economic angle - Salaries of the people getting married are looked at, and the basic economic background is looked at. It is rare that you see in an arranged marriage that a pauper is wedded to a millionaire.
8) No compromise made on talent/intellectual capability - Typically men prefer to marry women who are less or at most as educated as they are. I.e, you don't see a bachelor degree holder get married to a masters degree holder that often (in Arranged marriage). I can hear all "non MCPs" shouting at me now. I don't care. However much men scream, they have this ego which would blow up at some point in time. Even women prefer men who are more/at least as educated as they are for precisely the same reason. There are exceptions to this rule. Exceptions do not make examples
9) No compromise made on geography - These days I see a very common trend. In case the boy or girl has decided to stay in a particular city, say Bangalore, they make it very clear before the marriage so that later there are no qualms about the same. Also they make it very clear if they are going to work post marriage and also about what they feel about going and settling abroad. I think it is best these issues get sorted before marriage than after.
10) No compromise is made as far as other habits go - This would hold true for guys/gals who look for partners who do not have habits such as smoking/drinking and are very particular about it. However, this would hold true only if the other person does not lie about his/her drinking/smoking habits. But in case they are truthful about these, then there would hardly be any issues post marriage.

So, there go the 10 major compromises I "DONT" see in an arranged marriage. Once these major compromises are taken care, almost 90% of your life is made easy. All that is left is for you to just understand the other persons basic nature better, and the rest of the things just fall in place.

I do agree that in-spite of all these advantages of arranged marriages, there simply will be pairs which cannot stay together. But think for a moment...are all love marriages successful? In UK, where there is no concept of arranged marriage, 50+% of women over the age of 40 are unmarried (says a bbc survey).

Maybe something to think about.

P.S. : I hate the contribution Indian cinema has done to screw up the arranged marriage system. They have eulogized love marriages to such an extent that, just like you pick a random chinese movie and there is a high chance it is some kung-fu shit, so is the case with an Indian movie, you pick one, and there is a high chance it is some boy-meets-girl bull shit.

What I learnt from Corporate Finance

2007-10-23T01:39:00.001-07:00

The present value of a classroom bunk is greater than the future value. Hence bunk classes as soon as possible and exhaust your holidays.

P.S : Later if you fall sick and lose a GPA of 1, then please consider yourself unlucky, as this is the risk associated with the future value calculations.

The Ten Commandments of Classroom Participation

2007-10-23T01:38:00.001-07:00

Me and a few of my fellow classmates came up with the ten commandments. I am taking this from a fellow blogger aka vishesh.

MBA education uses levers as class participation (CP) and relative grading (RG) for effective classroom experience. Both mediums are powerfully effective when used (by students!) in the true spirit of learning, but have quite distasteful outcomes when the same students indulge in what they call RG-giri, i.e. trying to portray each other in negative light to score some brownie points in front of the instructor; and indeed, often these brownie points do translate into grades :)

Anyways, after one such session in a marketing course where the group presenting the case was massacered left, right and centre by an over-enthusiastic (Read: in the RG-giri mood) audience, yours truly too contributing with one question, we came out of the class laughing at ourselves...and then in the same lighter mood, postulated the Ten Commandments of CP.

Only if Moses was alive, he would not have complained of hearing just the Voice of the Divine.

(Some terms carry additional explanation in italics).

1) Thou shalt not CP in the last 2 minutes of a lecture; especially if the prof himself is overshooting the class timings

2) Thou shall not CP in XYZ course at all, the instructor already himself is a living CP specimen

(not mentioning the course to be, ah, politically correct)

3) Thou shall not CP if thou art Rajamundry

(an over-enthusiastic chap who CPs, I guess, without any RG intention)

4) The time between two consecutive CPs shalt atleast be 3 classes

5) Thou shalt treat the whole class if thou CP more than once in a single day

6) Thou shalt seek all CP-overdoer infidels and slay them in the name of God

7) Thou shalt NEVER EVER put in a follow-up CP

8) If thou art the last person to CP, thou get to be hooshed

(a popular physical torture over here in IIMB)

9) All case-presenters are thy brothers and sisters, thou shalt love them

10) Remember, thou shalt be CPed against the way thou CPed unto others

Credits: Vishesh, Sudhakar and yours truly

Made it into IIM B Finally!

2007-04-27T08:56:00.000-07:00

Finally my MBA journey comes to a definite conclusion after IIM B announced its result today. Me headed to IIM B in all probability.

I have Quit

2007-04-12T21:59:00.000-07:00

Have Quit Oracle. Would be soon joining Great Lakes Institute of Management or IIM B (in case I get into it).

Mozhi - Movie Review

2007-04-04T22:19:00.000-07:00

Caught the movie with a few friends of mine. Wonderful Wonderful movie.

Really touching. The movie was along the lines of Black(Hindi). Prakashraj has done an excellent job at comedy. Very spontaneous and very ingenius. The story is packed with powerful dialogue delivery. Down to earth and simple characters. Nothing that is out of the world.

On the whole a very good movie to watch. The hero, I am not sure of his name, is a good fit for the role. Songs are pretty good....very nice lyrics...especially the "Kaatrin Mozhi" song...

As such there is no designated comedian for the movie, but I feel there is no need with Prakashraj doing an excellent job at it. "Mutta kanni" Jo has done a very decent role. No "thoppul la" pambaram stuff. Basically a family movie. I think not many movies are watchable by 7-70 year olds together these days. This would be one such movie which you can see with your kid without getting embarassed.

But the sad thing about all these movies is that they continously keep "Love" (the I cannot live without you kinds) as the theme. Its like, watch a Chinese movie and you get a Kung Fu student whose father or master was murdered by a "Smoke Monkey" using his "Dragon Claws", and our hero, the student uses "Tiger Claws" to defeat him. Watch an Indian movie, and you have a hero running after the heroine. Some songs in exotic locales from Europe to Australia. Some stupid comedian gets beaten up and makes people laugh at it. Some fight scenes where the heroine's dad's bodyguards get their butt kicked by the hero. Very typical.

Very rarely do we see some new concepts. Even hollywood movies, especially the sci fi ones, have all this guey jooey aliens who ooze some kinda white or green liquid and have horrible faces. My God, can't humans atleast create an Alien who looks good? I guess only God can create beautiful creatures. When man tries to do the same, he ends up messing it.

Anyways, the movie gets a 8/10 from me. Worth the watch in theatres. No thiruttu VCD please. :)

300 - Movie Review and more

2007-03-28T22:47:00.000-07:00

I am wondering if the movie should be called 300 or 1800 (each of the 300 men had a 6 Pack Abs which makes it 1800 in all...perhaps even more). My God are those men candidates for the WWF.

Anyways, the movie has breathtaking special effects and the video is kinda different ...excellent colour mixing and beautiful cameramanship. Also, the movie brings a very historic event to light.

Boy were those guys huge. I have been to the Salar Jung Museum and I found the armour and weapons used by Tipu Sultan. I am guessing that the guy who wore that armour was atleast 7 ft tall and had a bicep that was bigger than my chest :)....on top of it these guys wear these things (weighing close to a 150 kgs if I am right), and fight with them. My God, were people strong. I suspect if even Arnold Schw (ok I always forget his spelling), couldve lifted it, let alone fight with it.

Spartans have an excellent history and I have always enjoyed reading about them. Something about history and wars always fascinates me as a subject, and that shows in my liking toward the game Age of Empires.

300 is a very nice movie. Worth the watch in the theatres. Especially for its special effects. I wonder how it is, to be a man, who walks toward his death with a smile in his face. I guess I have already blogged about such men when I wrote about Bhagat Singh in Rang De Basanti.

The sad thing about history is that, one can never really be sure of what "REALLY" happened.

We have seen that always the victorious rewrite history and we get a very impressive information about a king who "could" have been a tyrant.

Only a Time Machine can tell us the truth. The information we have about a king or a society in history, may just be an authors version in a scroll.

Let us take for instance, Emperor Ashoka,

Wiki says:

"Information about the life and reign of Ashoka primarily comes from a relatively small number of Buddhist sources. In particular, the Sanskrit Ashokavadana ('Story of Ashoka'), written in the 2nd century, and the two Pāli chronicles of Sri Lanka (the Dipavamsa and Mahavamsa) provide most of the currently known information about Asoka. Additional information is contributed by the Edicts of Asoka, whose authorship was finally attributed to the Ashoka of Buddhist legend after the discovery of dynastic lists that gave the name used in the edicts (Priyadarsi – meaning 'favored by the Gods') as a title or additional name of Ashoka Mauriya."

The truth may be that Emperor Ashoka was just a figment of imagination (of course this seems ridiculous, because you have studied about him since your childhood, but believe me, you havent seen him, so it is not science to be proven with a fact), it could very well be something that Emperor Ashoka "wanted" to be written, while the fact may have been something else.
So in essence, if these few books were to be destroyed, or we get another book that contradicts what is stated here then we have totally gotten history wrong.

Another example maybe the events surrounding the death of King Tut.Initially there was a theory, and later it changed after some new evidence came to light and so on...

The point I am trying to make here is that the country/king/society that Won a war or a battle gets to write history. They get to say what is correct.

For example, consider the movie "Pearl Harbour". The movie evokes sympathy toward the 2000 odd Americans who were killed. But what of the 2 million who were eradicated in a matter of 2 days in the Hiroshima Nagasaki bombings. Any death is condemnable, and it is really sad whatever happened. I am not saying Japan was correct in bombing the US, and neither was US correct in bombing Japan.

But there are certain things which are not shown in the movie:

1) The number of people killed in just those 2 days of atomic bombing was equal to perhaps the entire casualty of all the wars taken place before that period.
2) US Killed Civilians in Japan. Japan bombed a military harbour. Reading this article in wiki which talks about the choice of the city to be bombed:

Secretary of War Henry L. Stimson struck Kyoto from the list because of its cultural significance, over the objections of General Leslie Groves, head of the Manhattan Project. According to Professor Edwin O. Reischauer, Stimson "had known and admired Kyoto ever since his honeymoon there several decades earlier." On July 25 General Carl Spaatz was ordered to bomb one of the targets: Hiroshima, Kokura, Niigata, or Nagasaki as soon after August 3 as weather permitted and the remaining cities as additional weapons became available.

So Kyoto was spared because some guy in the American military had a good Honeymoon there. (of course not the only reason :) ) Nice.

Are these guys human? They are sitting around discussing which city to obliterate. I would have resigned from that committee had I even had the slightest feeling of humanity in me.

3) A few more months of war wouldve certainly brought defeat to Japan and there was really no need to kill close to 2 million people.
4) A military man can fight another military man in a war. I will never object to it. They both have chosen such a profession and it is their dharma/duty to fight for their country. But killing a civilain is never agreeable to me.
5) If the definition of a terrorist nation is that it bombs innocent civilians, then the US is perhaps the biggest terrorist nation. But what do we see today? Is history not being written by US? Are they not making it look as if whatever they do is for "justice", "Freedom", etc and all that bullshit.
6) Consider this, In Iran, there was a DEMOCRATIC leader called Mossaddegh. Read about him here.

In short, he brought all that "freedom", "liberty", "justice", "equality" crap that the US/UK so fervently advocate but never practice.

But sady, UK wanted Oil. Mossaddegh was not going to bend for the interests of UK. So UK went and told US (since it was too weak after the WW II) that Iran was becoming increasingly communist. So please depose Mossaddegh. US did its part. Sent its CIA goons to do the dirty job. Mossaddegh was deposed. Oil interests of UK restored to normalcy.

In essence the idea is not to provide "equality" blah blahs, but to get oil. Hypocrisy at its core.

7) I cannot even start talking about Iraq. Or Cuba. Or Vietnam. Or Taliban (Afganistan). These guys created the trouble and then they act as if they did this for "humanity" sakes. Bah. I am not a 6 year old kid.

History is littered with Attempts by the US/UK. But whom do we call a villain. Adolf Hitler.

Let me make one thing very clear here. I donot support Adolf. I donot support the US. I hate all forms of violence and killing against civilians and I am entirely against it.

All I wanted to actually talk about was that history is a very lovely subject (a subject of interest for me). But the greated tragedy about this subject is that it was what the historians choose to tell me that I have to listen to, rather than what really happened.

Anyways, I love Americans. I have been there, and it is a very nice country. I love all humans. No offense to a specific country here, but it is something that has to be thought about. I had a lot more to say here, but I will stop with this because I may unintentionally hurt the feelings of some.

And oh ya, movie gets a 7/10 from me.

:)
cheers
cb

Is Dumbledore dead?

2007-03-26T00:39:00.000-07:00

Ok, a lot of websites talk about this and let me pitch in my views on this:

1) I feel Snape is surely a good guy. No need to point out the evidence. Only a dumb idiot would miss the fact that in every book she tries to make him the bad guy and finally he turns out inculpable. Moreover, plenty of evidence in book six to suggest that he is indeed a good guy, such as "Dont call me a coward" scene, Dumbledore pleading Snape to "do the job" when he says "Snape, please"....come on, a man like Dumbledore would never plead for his life, and if he was not pleading for his life, then it was something more and if it is really something more then Snape is a good guy.

2) Secondly, JK has supposedly informed her fans that Dumbledore is defly dead (in an interview as an answer to Salman Rushdie). Here I have a new angle,

Consider this:

IF you are JKR, and you are asked :

"Is Dumbledore dead?"

You can say:

1) No. He is not dead.
--> And therefore give away a lot, and a lot of readers, though happy, would feel "what nonsense, why did she reveal the suspense"

2) No Comments.

--> In which case it become obvious without you telling....that Dumbly is not dead.

3) Yes he is dead.

--> The safest route. You have to stick on to what you have thus far said so that people shut up and stop asking more questions. Tomorrow, even if you wake him up from the dead, nobody is going to complain. And on top of it, as far as Book 6 is concerned he is dead. So he is dead. Full Stop. So JKR is not really lying anything.

Considering the three options, JKR has only used the best viable option, and I still tend to think Dumbly is not dead :)....I will give a 80:20 chance for his survival (or rather some sort of a comeback). A 100:0 chance for snape being the good guy. And if it really turns out Dumbly is dead, he sure has done a lot more (perhaps kicked out a few more horcruxes, taken care of a couple-a death eaters etc, without informing Harry, and also has arranged for a lot of other things which may unravel later) than what has been mentioned thus far.

Eagerly awaiting book 7 with Rs.1000 and for movie 5 with Rs. 100 in my hand :)

World Cup - India Bails Out

2007-03-25T22:03:00.000-07:00

Was waiting for Bermuda to crash before putting this blog. Nowit is final. India bows out of this world cup without even entering the Super Eight.

So what?

Why the hell is the media making such a bullshit out of this thing?

One channel , dont remember which, is asking "Because of whom have we lost the World Cup Chances. SMS A Chappel B Dravid C Dhone D Tendulkar"

What nonsense is all this? When will people grow up? We all are sad that India lost, but people, please stop pointing fingers. Sit back and think. Are we not over reacting?

Why the hell are people breaking Cricketers houses?

It is a huge loss for advertisers and I guess that is one reason why the media wants to gain as much mileage as possible in the few days that people would watch these channels out of anguish.

I had a big discussion about the crazy things these people do, and why media is acting in such immatured manner...

Some points that came from that discussion are that,

1) Yes, we lost. So what? We need to take things on the right stride and see what can be done next instead of burning effigies and cursing Dravid. Just a year ago this same public was worshipping him for the continuous 16 (or was it 17) Chase Victories he gave India. A couple of years ago they called for Ganguly's blood, and they want to make him captain today.

We all saw what happened to Sachin's form when he was made Captain. Now the same stuff is doing rounds once again. Luckily Sehwag scored a few runs the last two matches, else people will cry for his blood as well.

Guys, come on. Wake up. The fault is not there in the individual. The fault lies in the way we take it. Cricket is a sport as any other. We have not created a Computer System, that can play flawlessly and win everytime. Yes, we do enjoy when India wins, but please take it light if we lose.

2) Second, what can be done about the present state of Indian cricket?

--> First stop cribbing or crying and start analysing

--> Blame game is not going to work. Nip it at the bud. Everyone wants to win. Do you think Dravid wanted this loss? He bloody wants to win that cup a 1000 times more than you or I do.

--> These people have a famly. They have children. When people react this way, do you think they can play peacefuly? You tell me, if you were to be India's opener, with your parents, wife and children back in India under threat of being attacked, can you do a good job? Every man, even people in the military can do a good job only if they feel that back home they have the complete support of their people.

--> When someone gets selected for the Indian team, you can be damn well sure, he is talent wise much much better than anyone in the world. What could be the reason for him not to perform? --> It is you and me. We people create so much pressure on these poor people that they buckle. After all they too are humans. When you boo someone so badly if the lose, how can they play peacefully. Perhaps, India won the 1983 worldcup because people rarely cared about cricket and there wasn't as much hype about this game as it is today.

--> So should I not be angry or sad at India's loss? You damn well have every right to be sad and angry, but take it out on your bathroom or on your sofa. Not on Dravid or Dhonis house.

--> The attitude of Indians should change. Australia just lost a couple of series and did the Australian fans react that way? Infact not just India, I include Pakistan in this as well. People dying. People committing suicide when Pakistan loses to India. I think we are taking it a step too far here.

3) I may not be an expert on Cricket, but I can see that there are somethings that could be done to Indian cricket (mostly suggestions from my roommates)

--> Create pitches that resemble every nation and give the team practice on these pitches before we play a series there.
--> Give the cricketers rest. They are not Horses. I see them playing the most matches (close to 1.5 times the australians).
--> Keep coaches for all departments (i.e a bowling coach, batting coach etc.).
--> BASICS BASICS BASICS. Catch the cricketers young. Teach them the basics well. Stop blaming the present set of cricketers. They are already old, and it is tough to change them. Aim at the future.
--> Quick running between the wickets. We sorely lack here. We are soooooo lazy. When I see a match between Australia and SA, the match is so full of action. They keep running between the wickets the moment the ball leaves the bat. Maiden overs are almost impossible to see against these nations.
--> Fielding. Fielding. Fielding. 20-30 runs here and you win most matches.
--> When to take Powerplay. What to do when you win the toss :). In the Bangladesh match, our score was 192. IT is very clear that they were going to get there in 45 overs if at all they manage to do it. It is plain simple that you dont have to take the second powerplay at all, especially when they are scoring left right and center. I know it is easy to pass comments on this as we lost that match. But , think about it. Ricky Ponting did not risk the second Powerplay when Smith was going great guns, even though their target was 378.

We have to learn from other countries, and there is no shame in doing so if we implement it well. Srikanth was one of the first to introduce "Pinch Hitting" which the Lankans (especialy Jayasuriya) adapted very well to win the 1996 world Cup. Likewise if there is something the other teams are doing, we have to watch and learn.

All said and done, it is a game. Humans are involved. So it is bound to go either way, and we have to learn to take it in the right stride.

4) Also, I wanted to make one point very clear here. Cricketers have NO BLOODY MORAL responsibility as Srikanth was pointing out. I COMPLETELY disagree with him on this. Indian Government is morally responsibile to the citizens of India, because we pay taxes. So someone who pays taxes/or holds a ration card, has every right to question the government. But not the same with Cricket. It is a sport. You cannot ask Sania Mirza why she is not winning the Wimbledon. It is her effort. She wins or she loses. You watch the match because you yourself made the choice to do so. Sania has no moral responsibility to answer you why she lost. If you are pissed with her losing a match, then please go and take out your anger on a teddy bear. You have no damn right to tell her that she is answerable to the Indian fans. Remember, you are a "FAN". Nothing more. Dont tell me that you watch TV and therefore pay for the Cable, and that money is used for advertising, and so on and finally the stars are paid from that money. It is a stupid argument and is similair to saying that you buy a shirt and you pay Raymonds, and he in turn pays the textile mills, and they in turn pay the farmers. Therefore you expect the farmer to do what you say. You are just buying a shirt for your comfort, and the farmer is just doing his job. Noone is morally responsible here.

5) On the whole, this world cup has been a total disaster. A Murder. 2 Giant nations bowing out before the Super 8. Crores of advertising losses.

Anyone game for a Pakistan India series while the world cup is going on ? :)... maybe that will put the smiles on the advertisers ....

World Cup Cricket - 2007

2007-03-13T23:11:00.000-07:00

The World Cup Cricket has kicked off with a West Indian Win (I wanted them to win as they were the home team, and I somehow like to see West Indies lift the cup if it is not going to be India).

This is the first time there is a World Cup in which every participating team stand an almost equal chance.

Australia just coming after a set of defeats in the hands of England and New Zealand, are not the clear favourites like they were last year (also a lot of their players down with injuries). I donno why I donot support Australia. Maybe because I have this tendency to not take the side of the strongest team :)....

SA is yet to win a world cup and it would be my third favourite to do it this time.

India has perhaps the best chance to do it this year. This is not because this team is the strongest of all (I still feel the last world cup team was stronger), I feel that they stand a better chance this year because the other teams are much weaker than their earlier World Cup teams.

Coming to think of it, almost all teams this year are not in the pink of their health. I wouldve much rather preferred a world cup without injury affected teams.

Ok enough about cricket...I am not the greatest fan of cricket...just a casual watcher :)...but of course want India to win! :)

Nishabd - Movie review

2007-03-11T00:03:00.000-08:00

Disclaimer : Kids better off not reading this. Reader discretion advised.

Was another overloaded weekend with 3 movies, one each on Friday, Saturday and Sunday. But I am gonna only write about Nishabd. I watched Blood Diamond, but not in a mood to blog about it :)....its defly a good movie (better than Nishabd), but its a big topic if talked about and could go on forever :)....

The other movie was Ghost Rider. No point talking about this movie. "Thali Kaatha Kali Amman" wouldve been a better movie. Dont even bother with VCDs.

Ok now to Nishabd,

"Some Love Stories are never meant to be understood" - goes the phrase in the posters of the movie.

Methinks - Whats there to understand? All it takes to fall head over heels for someone like Jiah,, is just a hint of a male genitalia.

Here goes the expense chart of the movie:

Salary For Amitabh : 0 rupees (the director showed him Jiah and said that he gets to kiss her)
Dress Expenses for Jiah : 300 rupees ( for the 3 underwears)
Revathy, Nasar and Amit's daughter were paid a total of : 3 Lakhs
And ya, for Aftab : he decided to pay the director Rs. 5 Lakhs for getting to hug Jiah
Travel and other expenses : Rs. 1 Lakh
Jiah's Salary : 2 crores (ya she's worth it man)

Amitabh goes to great lengths to convince us that he likes Jiah not for her legs or her other "assets" but for her spirit and youthful character.

Oh ya ......, I believe you. Its definitely not her spirit...oops legs.

I had read very bad reviews of the movie and still had enough sense to watch the movie from my experience of stupid reviewers. And yes, I still continue to believe that movie reviewers are really biased.

Jiah has really acted well. (Ok, I know what you are thinking, but its not that :) ). She has really done a good job. Amitabh is of course good and so are the other characters. The movie is quite natural and it could really take place. I liked the ending as well. It was a frank thing Amit said in the end. I like that kind of frankness better than comitting suicide due to inability to control your senses.

All in all the movie is watchable once for sure. I would rate it as a 5.5/10. No thiruttu "vcd" please :)....

After watching the movie me and my friend had a big discussion... and I was inspired to write something about the mother of all topics of Indian Cinema. "Love". Let me see if I find sometime.

Cheers
cb

My IIM B interview experience

2007-03-07T04:23:00.000-08:00

Reached B'lore in the morning of March 6. The push for a better infrastructure in the city seems to have made a leeeetle impact. Roads seemed to have become a bit better than the last time I was in B'lore.

Anyways, let me come to the point.

My interview was at 2.30. GD started with a case study. I was 5th in the group of 8 (1 guy did not turn up).

GD was a very simple topic. I started to speak and on the whole I think I did quite well. Easily among the top three performers and arguably the top performer. But I guess GD does not matter much.

Then the PI starts

2 profs took the interview. One person a very cordial smiling face. Let me call him P1. Second prof a bit of a serious type and "Cut the bullshit" look. Let me call him P2.

I go inside

P2: Let me see your certificates

P1: So Bala. Tell me about yourself. Not the usual stuff. We have read your SOP and all...but tell me something more about you as a person
Me : Usual start....then blah blah about my strengths. Told him about my nature and stuff. And then went on to hobbies....blah blah more...

P1: So you are a creative person. What have you done that makes you think you are creative...

Me: Sir, I blog. I write short stories, they have come in oracle magazine, and famous websites...blah blah.....
Also I make advertisement and posters for the Ora Vol Club and Emp. Club at oracle (wanted to take and show him the posters I had done from my file, but he said "thats ok...we believe you")
Also in my own team I have done this and I have done that blah blah blah...

P1: Hmm...so are you a deviant?
Me: <>Hmm, sir, are you asking in a positive sense or a negative sense?
P1: I dont know. You tell me.
Me: If I take it in the postive sense then yes. I am not someone normal. I have certain abilities that make me special. I am creative. blah blah..more nonsense...
P1: So , you dont follow rules and ethics?
Me: No sir, if I take "deviant" to mean someone who does not follow ethics then I am not a deviant. I follow ethics.
P1 : So , tell me 2 people from India who are creative.

Me : Thyagaraja swamigal in carnatic music is a creative genius...he has done this he has done that blah blah
P1: Is he one of the trinity?
Me: Yes sir.
P2: Ok enough. Tell me someone who is alive.

Me: Infy Narayanamoorthy

P2: Ok tell me what he did that makes you think he is creative.
Me: Outsourcing. Pre 1991 Economic reform era. He was a person who spotted opportunity where there was none...blah blah
P2: Was it just him or his team?
Me: It was also Nandan Nilekani and others in his team
P2: Who else were there?
Me : I am not sure of the names of the others. But there was a team.
P2: So is Narayanamoorthy creative or his team?
Me: The team.
P2: Ok, so tell me, is being creative being innovative?

Me: ...sir could you repeat that?

P2: If I say that I am creative, am I also innovative.
Me: Yes.
P2: So if I just sit and think about atoms and me flying amidst them , and doing arbit things, am I innovative?
Me: Sir, no. Just thinking about it is not enough. One should put his ideas into action, only then he becomes innovative.

P2: Ok, now to the GD. You were suggesting that the person use a AC Taxi, and reimburse the fair for non AC right?
Me: Yes sir.
P2: Now you are oracle sales head. Larry asks you to go to Argentina...
..............
..........

lots of stories. And then he gives me an ethical vs. unethical drama...

Me: I chose to stick on to ethics at the cost of losing my money.

P2: So you will lose so much money from your pocket?
Me: Given all the conditions I would.
P2: Ok, then next larry asks you to repeat that excercise.....
Me: Oops. That puts me in a tricky situation indeed.

.....they decided to move on...

P1: Who are Oracle's competitors and what is oracles most serious threat today....
Me: I wanted to take the ERP story....started off with acquisitions, SAP .....
P2 cut me
P2: Is ERP oracle's primary business?
Me: No sir it is Databases.
P2: Then tell me about the competitors of Oracle DB
Me: Sir they are, IBM DB2, Microsoft SQL Server, Sybase, Teradata, MySQL

P2: Tell me about MySQL
Me: Sir it is a freeware
P2: Freeware?
Me: It is an open source Software
P2: Is open source same as freeware.
Me: No sir. Open source is not same as freeware. But My SQL is a open source available for free download on the internet (I think I went wrong here...not sure if it is a free download)

P2: Compare My SQL and Oracle
Me: Gen fundas....basically more robust...blah blah
P2: Yahoo.com uses MySQL. Why?
Me: some more fundas....Gave some large customers who use oracle

P2 was not satisfied and he said...
P2: Dont tell me why Oracle is good. Tell me how yahoo manages with MySQL
Me: Some fundas...such as Yahoo may have a lot of servers to handle the number of requests...

P2 went on to the next qn.

P2: So why MBA
Me: The usual fundas.
P2: Hey come on, why not a neurosurgeon. You can be a neuro surgeon and have all the things you just said.
Me: Sir, not in my interest....blah blah...
P2: Why here?
Me: Esteemed faculty, peer group...student exchange blah blah...
P2: Boss. You are not coming here to look at our old faces are you? There is something in you that motivates you to come here. What is that.
Me: Down the lane I want to be a business leader in the IT Space and I think IIM B is the right platform to get there.
P2: That is what I wanted to know. That will be all. Thanks for your time.

Me walked out...not knowing how it went...

Guess I will know soon....

Keeping fingers crossed for now...

yo
cb

YSR in Devil's Advocate

2007-02-25T21:21:00.000-08:00

Caught this episode in CNN IBN late night a few days ago. Boy what a hilarious entertainment it turned out for me :)....

I really appreciate Karan Thapar's Guts...he does have it in him to ask such questions to top politicians.

The topic initially starts off with Karan Thapar asking our YSR abour 310 acres of land in his name and ehre is what YSR had to say about it....
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Karan Thapar:It’s not just facts that you were ignorant of? As a four time or five time MLA in Andhra Pradesh you have been chairman of the Constituency Assignment Committee and you were ignorant of the fact that you yourself owned an assigned land.

YS Rajashekar Reddy: That’s right I’m telling you. The fact was never brought to my notice. As and when it was brought to my notice I gave it to the government, I surrendered it to the government.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Oh my god! Too many jokes in my mind!! I am cracking up...can't control myself!!! I am already in the floor laughing as I type this....

Ok , so here goes my excuse for not filing Income Tax Returns "Hi Indian Government. I donot know that I should pay taxes. Nobody told it to me. As soon as someone brings it to my notice I would pay my taxes. Till then, so long and thanks for all the fish"

Next,

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Karan Thapar: I will tell you one of the thing wrong with this 180 acres. You have surrounded it with a compound wall or a compound fence. That compound wall denies access to the public to this land, which is illegal.

YS Rajashekar Reddy: The compound wall is there because there has to be fence, otherwise there are lot of forest animals that come.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ohohohoh!!! I just can't control it...

S.Ve. Sekhar could not have provided a better entertainment.

"There are a lot of forest animals that come in the land. They pee there. They dirty it up. How can I allow forest animal to pee in the land that belongs to the public. Hence I put compound wall. In fact, I will put compound wall everywhere around all the forests so that those animals dont come inside the cities and dirty the roads. Bad Forest animals. Bad Bad forest animals."

Next...

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Karan Thapar: The Opposition has said in fact, for land ceiling purposes you have claimed that the land at Kundur was non-agricultural. Yet, for income tax purposes you have claimed that the income earned at Kundur is agricultural. How can you have it both ways?

YS Rajashekar Reddy: Well at that point of time, I don’t know whatever has been filed in income tax.

Karan Thapar: You mean once again you are ignorant of what you are filing yourself in the income tax.

YS Rajashekar Reddy: No, its only about this particular land. I own so many lands in so many places.

Karan Thapar: That means you are so rich and you have land in so many places that you don’t know what you are talking about.

YS Rajashekar Reddy: Yes, ultimately whatever has been filed in the income tax is there.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Let the opposition go to court because I had the cake and ate it too.

I was reminded of a Tamil movie "Mudhalvan" which was remade into "Nayak" in Hindi. As I saw KT's interview I was waiting for the moment when the CM would say "Do you know how difficult it is to be a CM. Why dont you be a CM For one day. Just one day. You be a CM and then you will not talk like this"....

But sadly..that never happened...I guess movies will only be movies...

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hmm...Jokes apart...I read the other day in one of the Indian Economy Blogs (not exactly the same words), that "politicians spend their first two years earning back what they have spent in their elections. The next three years they have to spend improving their vote bank, making more connections, and increasing their coffers to face the next election.Hence it is wrong to actually say that Politicians are Corrupt. Saying that a politician is corrupt is like saying the Grass is Green. We need to see how best we can extract good things from them."

It was nice to read it, but it makes me think. Is a politican necessary for the world. Is a politician a necessary evil. Can the world be rid of politics? Is such a world possible? Hmm...have to think...I dont think that such a world is impossible....

Life Goes On...

2007-02-25T21:07:00.000-08:00

She was very close to salvation. God only wanted her to control two senses to get there. She did not have the senses of vision,hearing and speech right from birth.

When her parents were asked what they felt about their child all they said was,

"She is God's Merit Certificate of Goodness to us. God was thinking which couple would get this very special kid of his. As he looked around, he felt that we were the most loving and caring couple in this world, and hence he gave her to us. We shall try to live up to his expectations."

Ek Choti si Love Shtory

2007-02-21T00:04:00.000-08:00

He was always practical. She was a romantic. It was not love at first sight.

She always asked him "Will you die for me?"
He would reply "Of course not. Thats crazy. I want to live with you"

Of course, she did not want him dead, but she had wished he had replied otherwise.

She did not see the bus coming her way. He had. He knew it was him or her. He chose her.

All are equal in the eyes of the Government

2007-02-19T23:04:00.000-08:00

Hence, they have made sure that it takes as much time to book a railway ticket from here as it takes to actually go to a counter and buy one.

It took me close to 1 hour to book a ticket in that stupid website. I know there must be a lot of traffic, but how hard is it to increase a couple of more servers to handle it. Secondly, has anyone who booked the tickets online, had their money debitted from the account, but did not have a ticket delivered? IT has happened to me a lot of times. However, they do give you back your money once they have realized their mistake (about 3-4 days later). Meantime my money can be invested in the share market in some IPOs (kidding :) ). Also, what about the surcharge my bank levied on the transaction that never happened? Where do i report that loss.

I think I have to report it to someone in Railways...but as usual..the trouble is I donot know whom to report this to. Let me see...

Ekalavya - Movie review and more

2007-02-18T21:44:00.000-08:00

DISCLAIMER : I donot intend to hurt the feelings of any readers. I love the Epic Mahabharata in all respects. The reason why have complained of certain aspects here is perhaps because I am trying to see a different period/culture/era through todays perspective. In essence, I am trying to see which part of this wonderful epic, can be of use in today's circumstances. Moreover, my understanding may perhaps be wrong in certain aspects. I would love it if someone could clarify them. Reader discretion advised.

Finally reached the theatre on time. In fact, had enough time to grab a Kulfi on the way. Movie starts of by narrating the story of the Mahabharata's Ekalavya.

For those who donot know him, he is a Tribal who wanted to learn Archery from Guru Drona. But Drona, (with a big inflated ego of having taught princes), refuses to take him in as a student. Finally he makes a statue of Drona, and practices in front of it himself. One day , Drona finds a dog barking in the jungle. He is very irritated by the noise the dog makes, and he wants to silence the dog. Suddenly the dog appears out of the jungle carrying arrows in its mouth. Someone had shot arrows into the dog's mouth in such a deft manner that it neither hurt the dog, nor allowed it to bark. It was Ekalavya. Now Drona was very worried that this Tribal has far outperformed Arjuna in Archery even without Drona's coaching. In order for Arjuna to be the best archer in the world, Drona asked Ekalavya for a Gurudakshina (a fees for "teaching" him). Ekalavya , being the ever faithful follower of "so called Dharma", offers anything to Drona. Drona asks Ekalavya's right hand thumb (without which he would not be able to string the bow). Ekalavya hands it over. It is said that he learnt archery without the thumb, but never became as good as Arjuna and was slain in the Mahabharata war.

Coming to the movie, it was a good watch. Vidya B rocks. Even with minimal make up she perfectly fits the "homely" girl kind of role. Amitabh is the perfect fit for the role of Ekalavya. The others have done their bits nicely as well. Go to the theater. No "thiruttu" VCDs please :)

The best thing I liked about the movie was that it really opened my eyes to certain things (Especially in the domain of Consummation and lineage :) )... in the mythological stories :)....

Let me first take the Mahabharata:

1) Santanu, King of Hastinapura, marries Ganga. Begets Bheeshma. Then Ganga goes bye bye after Santanu interferes in her personal space.

All fine till now. King has a son and he needs a new queen (As the old one decided to ditch him).

The King as he walks in the forest is struck at the beauty of a fisherman's daughter. Satyavati by name.

Some little known Fact: Satyavati was otherwise known as Yojanagandha.

Guess why?Sage Parashara was "enamoured" by her, and they both had a child who is known to the world as Veda Vyasa. Sage Parashara gave her a boon that she would emit fragrance from within her body which would spread for a whole Yojana.

So the King basically wants to marry someone who has already begotten a child. Nothing wrong with that. But, the fisherman puts the condition that Bheeshma should not be crowned king, and the one born of Satyavati/Santanu should only become king. Also, Bheeshma's generations should never become king.

Raja Santanu is now in a dilemma --> On one side Bheeshma has to take a hike. On the other he has to control his "feelings" for Satyavati.

Seeing his Dad's "dilemma" our dear Bheeshma offers to stay celibate. He vows not to marry and beget children. Also he vows he would never become king.

--> Cut

Can't a king control his feelings for a girl? When his son is so mature that he says he would stay celibate, what crazy king (that too at that age), would decide to marry a girl. Is the king "THAT" desperate?
It is said that this very king gave Bheeshma the boon (so pleased at his sons devotion), that Bheeshma could live for as long as he wanted and would die only when he chose to. Hey come on, give me a break. The king himself seems a loser to me. How could he have such powers as to grant an almost "immortal" boon to Bheeshma?

Ok, thats not fine.

Next,

2) Satyavati gives birth to two children , Chitrangadha and Vichitraveerya. Now, these two are incapable of consummating (in some versions it is said they died too early before giving birth to children....but I think that is just a polished way of putting things). So kingdom has no heir (as Bheeshma is also not going to help here). So what does our dear Queen Satyavati do?

She brings along her first born Veda Vyasa to do the job these two goons have failed to do. Veda Vyasa impregnates Ambika and Ambalika (and another Dasi (servant) woman). To them are born Dhritharashtra (born blind), Pandu (with white skin disorder), and Vidura (an excellent tactician and a brilliant politician).

--> Cut

Ok, so basically these kids are of Veda Vyasa and not Santanu's. So not only is our dear Bheeshma made to bear the ignominy of having to protect and serve his younger step brothers, he now has to serve and protect these new goons (Pandu and Dhritharashtra), who for that matter are not even the Royal Lineage. They are basically grandchildren of Sage Parashara to put it into proper perspective. They are not even Kshatriyas in that respect. Hmm....something wrong here :)

3) So is it over?

Nope.

More confusion.

Pandu has a curse upon himself that if he were to touch a women he would immediately die (ya this happened because he killed a Sage when the Sage was having sex. So the Sage basically got pissed and cursed Pandu :(....boy talk of revenge).

Pandu was given Kingdom because his elder brother was blind. If that be the case, since Pandu cannot have sex, let Vidura (his younger brother) get the kingdom. Would that not be logical? Was there some suppression here because he was born of a Dasi?

Do we see a bit of attitude here?

So now, Kunti is called for help. She has a "boon" with which she can invoke any God to give her a child (oh ya, the details of how exactly the Gods would "give" her a child are left to imagination).

Oh ya, I forgot, she had once used this power upon Surya Deva(Sun God), and already had an illegitimate son by name Karna (who grows up as a charioteers son).

Cut ---->

Poor Karna. What was his fault. His stupid mom was afraid she will get a bad name for having a child before marrying someone. So she throws the kid into the river. Is Kunti a "High born" or are Karna's Charioteer Parents "High Born".
Karna is logically the ELDEST of all the Pandavas and Kauravas (to come soon). So technically he now should be king....but what happened?

So now Pandu cannot have kids. Kunti can invoke Gods to give her kids. Hence she invokes Lord Yama, Indra, Vayu (in that order) and gives birth to Yudhistra, Arjuna and Bheema.

She then tells this secret to Madri (Pandus second wife), and she in turn invokes the Ashvini Twins and gives birth to Nakula and Sahadeva.

Cut -->

Ok, the King cannot have sex with Kunti/Madri. So Kunti calls a whole battalion of Gods and begets children. Why could she not have stopped with just one kid, if it is only a question of lineage?
The Choice of Gods --> In essence, these ladies wanted to sleep around with these Gods. Thats the bare fact. And they did. It mustve been a very very very very tolerant society for the husband to knowingly acknowledge this fact. Hmm...something to think about here.

One more Cut --->

So, here again the kids are not of Pandu's. Now Bheeshma after having served his step brothers, and then Vyasa's kids, now has to serve these kids of the Gods. Oh my God!!!
I always wondered if Bheeshma was a nut case? I have a doubg if these thoughts ever crossed his mind : "Where is my allegiance? Who are all these people sitting in my dads throne. A bunch of people from a whole different set of families"

Hmm...

The biggest comedy of all this is that these kids end up fighting each other for the throne, which really "Lawfully" belongs to Bheeshma.

Sad part is Bheeshma dies "protecting" his kingdom. Oh my god....am I confused :)

What exactly is "Dharma". What is correct and what is wrong? Hmm...maybe I am not fit enough to pass comments on this, but I can say one thing for sure.

Ekalavya should not have given his Thumb. Bheeshma should not have entertained his fathers lust.

A Lovely Poem

2007-02-13T22:40:00.000-08:00

In Shekhar Kapur's blog: Letting Go

Of Dress Codes

2007-02-06T00:33:00.000-08:00

There has been a lot of heated debate in India (and perhaps in other countries about what to wear and what not to wear). I donot want to take a "political" or "diplomatic" stance on it :). In other words, I am not going to give my views on that topic.

However, I happened to read an article in Week magazine(I think sometime in November), which I had wanted to post, but never had time. The article was on Sri Sai Baba. The thing he said in that interview about dress code was nice.

He said "Wear that dress which would not stop a simple villager to come to you and ask for help. How can a simple villager ask for help from some one who does not appear to belong to his world" (not the exact words...but the idea is same)....

Thought I would share it :)....

Salam - E - Ishq ka Salaam

2007-02-05T23:21:00.000-08:00

Went to the movie 15 mins late because of the usual traffic problem near the Punjagutta Circle near Hyde Central. The movie (from where I saw) started showing the John.A and Vidya.B pair...

I really dont know if movie reviewers are biased by heart or they are paid to be so or it is just me who sees it in a different angle. Guru got a rave review when I would rate it as a 3/10 movie whereas Salaam E Ishq got some near bad reviews (a) , (b) , (c) , while I would rate it as a 6/10 movie.

When I first saw the trailor of this movie, I really thought it was yet another Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham , Hum Saath Saath Hain type movie (one where you throw a couple of crores on a simple Karva Chauth and another couple of crores for a birthday party, and the whole movie is a blown up marriage cassette or a pathetic mother-son-dad-bro-sis-wife-nani sob story)

But I was really in for a surprise. The movie did move me. All six stories shown had their own plots well developed and they were all brought together well. The movie needed all the elements and none of the stars are really overdone.

Spoiler (dont read if u plan to see the movie)

I liked the Govinda/Shannon Esra pair the most. The foreign actress has done a really good job in this movie. She looks a lot like Naomi Watts. I initially thought that John/Vidya pair is not a good one, but after seeing the movie my opinions have changed. There is humour in Isha/Sohail pair. There is infidelity in Juhi/Anil pair. There is fear of commitment in Akshaye/Ayesha pair. And there is the usual DDLJ, HAHK kinda love in the Priyanka, Salman pair. I found all six themes entertaining and the movie did not drag one bit.

Moreover, the movie is quite real-life like (Except for Sallu pair). What I mean is, it could happen. And it is perhaps happening too.

All in all I would say it is worth to spend your money for this movie in the theatre. Don't watch "thiruttu" VCDs :) for this nice movie.

Cheers
cb

Two sides of the same coin

2007-02-04T20:02:00.000-08:00

The Head of it

It was a daylight robbery. Police were all around Mr.Sharma's house in search of clues. Fingers were pointed at Ramayya their servant. Ramayya knew he had no role in the burglary. The police just needed a nod from Mr.Sharma to round Ramayya up.

"Did you do it Ramu?", asked Mr.Sharma
"No sir. I did not. I had nothing to do with this.", replied Ramayya, tears welling up in his eyes.

A few days ago Ramayya had asked Mrs.Sharma an advance for his daughters marriage. Mrs. Sharma had refused. Mr.Sharma put one and one together and gave the go ahead to the police.

Ramayya languished in the gaol for three months before the real culprit was discovered. There was another burglary that happened in Mr.Sharma's house six months later. This time the police never nabbed the culprit. It was Ramayya.

The Tail of it

It was a daylight robbery. Police were all around Mr.Verma's house in search of clues. Fingers were pointed at Krishnayya their servant. Krishnayya's heart was pounding fast. The police just needed a nod from Mr.Verma to round Krishnayya up.

"He did not do it", affirmed Mr.Verma to the police
"Sir, are you sure? Your wife tells that he had asked an advance for his daughters marriage. All evidence points to him.", asked the Inspector.
"I am sure", was the response.

Krishnayya's daughters wedding took place three months later. Six months later Mr.Verma opened his safe and found the burgled money replaced. Someone had surrendered himself to the police for the crime. It was Krishnayya.

Home and the World - Book Review

2007-01-24T22:25:00.000-08:00

After reading Gora, "Ghare Bhaire" was my next choice (Ghare - Home, that which belongs to home, Bhaire - That which is from outside, or external). I read the treanslation (by Surendranath Tagore) of Ghare Bhaire (Rabindranath Tagore).

Once again Tagore has proven his brilliance. The words he uses in his sentences are like pearls in a necklace. The way he expresses himself is simply exquisite.

You have a point of view (POV). You want to put it through. How do you do it?

Ask Tagore.

He creates characters out of all possible POVs and makes them part of his drama. They then unfold , making you think it is a story. In the end you find Tagore has expressed almost all the POVs in a subject. Such was how I felt after I read this book.

Spoiler - Dont read further if you plan to read the book.

This is the first time I am reading a novel, that tells the story from three different angles. i.e, the book unfolds as "Bimala's Story", "Sandip's Story" and "Nikhil's story". I saw a tamil movie which was also of the same theme (i.e narrating from different POVs, i.e Virumaandi).

Quite a nice concept really. Instead of being a third person who narrates the story, or the hero who tells his journey, this is one more way to develop a novel. I really loved the triumph of mankind over blind patriotism. The love for a fellow human being winning over the love for one's caste, rigid values etc. (as Nikhil's master has shown). And as usual, Tagore's women are strong characters and rich in values.

On the whole a good read. I would rate this at the same level as Gora. I am now latching on to A History of the World in 10.5 chapters by Julian Barnes (suggested by one friend of mine).

Cheers
cb

History of Religions

2007-01-23T01:35:00.000-08:00

Found this nice website:

http://mapsofwar.com/images/Religion.swf

However, there is a slight misgiving I have about the above website. It shows Hinduism as the name of the religion as it is today. However, the word "Hindu" is a coined word (and it was coined by the Britishers for all it takes :) just a few hundred years ago).

Before this word was in place, there were Shaivites, Shanmugaites, Vaishnavites, Kali Worshippers etc throughout India. To unite them all under one head, the Britishers used the word "Hindu".

I would call the religion as the "Vedic" religion, or rather the Vedic Way of Life. The Vedas together with the Upanishads, and the other "Angas" (parts) such as Bhagavad Gita, Ramayana, Mahabharata etc. make up the core of the religion people of the Indus Valley (India).

One more flaw I see with the above map is that it mentions "Hinduism" to have started at around 3000BC. But in the Mahabharata itself there is mention of the Vedic Lore, which clearly implies that it predates the 3000 BC period mentioned. Also, Ramayana which is a part of the "Itihasa" (history), studied as part of Vedic education, predates Mahabharata. There is mention of the 4 vedas in the Ramayana. Vedas themselves mention that there is no specific "Starting" point for them.

Also, there is very little mention of Nature Worshippers, Aboriginal religions, and about other religions practiced in other areas of the world (it cannot be possible that the other parts of the world were not doing much about religion all that time :) ). Maybe, the reason why it was left out was because,that information is not available or that those religions are today non-existent.

Anyways, that apart it is quite interesting to see the above URL.

Cheers
cb

Guru - Movie Review

2007-01-22T23:27:00.000-08:00

I saw this movie over the weekend (actually was an overloaded weekend with 3 Tamil and 1 hindi movie :) )....

3 Words - "Too much hype"

Too much hype is given to the movie. Too much hype is given to Abhishek within the movie.

Abhisheks acting performance was quite good. Aish seems to have made an attempt to act in this movie. Maddy and Vidya as usual have done well. However, the acting performances alone are not sufficient to make a movie good. It requires a solid story and once a character is given a certain amount of build-up - he needs to live up to it. For example, in the movie Baasha (a Tamil movie), Rajni lives upto the build up he is given. Here, sadly, Junior Bachchan is shown as someone who cracks a lot of business deals with ease, but how he cracks them remains something to be told.

Spoiler Warning - I am going to talk about the movie here on.Read only if you want to

Abhishek convinces the IAS officer to open the market. How? By putting bales of silk in his house? How silly can you get. All it takes for the IAS officer to get rid of "Gurubhai" is to throw that silk on the road. Next we see some crap about him pulling off a deal with some "honest minister". What Abhishek talks to convince the minister is not told. But just that the deal got finalised.

The background music is quite ok and the screenplay seems to be good as well. But all said and done, the movie fails to inspire anything. And all that comparison with Ambani's, hmm...might be true...Dhirubhai also started with textile (he too went to Yemen, and this guy for a "change" goes to Turkey). Then Dhirubhai entered the petroleum industry. He was also concerned only with making money for his shareholders.

But all said and done, the movie fails to tell the audience what the bottom line is.... :)....

cheers
cb

Racism

2007-01-17T00:58:00.000-08:00

The news channels seem to be full of the Shilpa Shetty Racism issue. I read this article and I thought of blogging about it as well. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/6265127.stm

"
The trio also complained that Shilpa had touched other housemates' food with her hands.
Danielle said: "You don't know where those hands have been."

After so many thousands of years of civilisation, are we truly educated? Seeing the remarks that have been made against the actress I am full of sympathy for her.

We saw what happened in France a few months ago. The movie "Crash" was well directed and brought out a lot of important facts.

Looks like Racism is there to stay.

The more one is educated and the more one is wealthy, the lesser he cares about all else. Especially about fellow humans. Arrogance in one's race and lack of confidence on the part of the oppressed race, is the root cause for Racism.

But the oppressors do have a reason to be arrogant about.

Do we Indians not foolishly try to imitate the west in all we do?
Do we Indians not look upto them?
Did Vivekananda gain praise because he preached in Kanyakumari or in Los Angeles?
Did the Bhagavad Gita get notice because of us or because Einstein had some good things to say about it?
Did the Vedas Gain prominence because of Max Muller or because of Ved Vyasa?

I request all Indians to just think about this. Let us stop looking up toward the westerners for each and everything in our life and take pride in our own culture and tradition.

Confidence in oneself will automatically eradicate Racism. If all races are very self confident, there is no question of Racism.

I request Shilpa to stay calm in this situation and act like a matured Indian. We Indians are too matured to react to this kind of silly childish remarks. Please know that in this issue you have my fullest support.

Of Names once again

2006-12-20T21:53:00.000-08:00

Some parents just hate their kids. Their hatred is clearly evident the moment they name their kids,

Consider this : "Lovelykrishna"

Yes. That really is the name of a guy. Boy, did his parents make sure he never gets a girlfriend.

Which girl in her sane mind would say "Hi friends, meet my boyfriend Lovely. Isn't he lovely?"

LOL"y"

It looks like the United Nations has had its bad share of names too. Consider the past few Secretary Generals:

1) Kofi Annan - I could do with some Kofi right now
2) Butros Butros Gaali -Does Butros mean "My name sucks"?
3) U Thant - His dad wanted to name him "Hugh Grant" , but ended up sneezing at the wrong time. And meet Mr. General Secretary, instead of a Hollywood hottie.

Keeping up with the tradition of bad names comes our latest UN Secretary General:

4) Ban Ki-Moon - Any takers for this one?

Oh boy! Lovelykrishna is surely a candidate in running for the UN General Secretary. He has one qualification I can see that makes him a good fit.

Cricket authorities have a great sense of humour too. Check out some of the players:

1) Chaminda Vaas - They selected him so they could say "Chaminda Vaas selected" . He vaas quite angry the newspapers printed it that way. He said "I vaas quite pissed. This vaas not what I expect from the newspapers"

Hmm...its ok Vaas, this vaas not meant to happen on purpose.

2) Mahendra Veeren Nagamootoo - Yes. He is our dear Thirunalveli Nagamuthu Shastri's long lost cousin.

3) Dwayne Bravo - I can understand when parents want to praise their kids. But our DJ's parents were so full of praise for their boy, they decided that anyone who calls him has to praise him.

I guess Lovelykrishna would also make a good cricketer going by the list of people selected. I can see one very good reason!

Gora - Book Review

2006-11-29T01:54:00.000-08:00

Suggested to me by one of my closest friends, I had a go at this book by Rabindranath Tagore and finished it in a couple of days and am I grateful for the suggestion.

A Wonderful masterpiece.

Spoiler Warning: Dont read below if you plan to read the book.

The one thing that really amazed me was how simple english words were used in the novel to explain complex mood shifts. I can say with confidence that at various stages of my own life, I have been one of the central characters. I have changed from being a Gora to a Binoy to a Paresh babu all through.

The strength of the characters that he portrays is something to take note of. No wonder Tagore was a force to be reckoned with in India during that time.

I love the strength of Lolita and Sucharita. In fact I really wish all women were as strong willed. Bharathiyar's "Pudhumai pen" was clearly visible in Lolita.

The excellent shift in the way Sucharita's Auntie behaves goes to show how deep his understanding of his characters and in general about humans is.

I wonder if any social issue was left uncovered in this masterpiece. A must read. Gives you a good idea about pre-independence Bengal and a brief jump into the mindset of the people during that period as well.

One peculiar thing I noticed in the book was the way people start addressing each other after half the book. Sucharitha and Lolitha are being addressed by their father as "mother". Mistress Baroda becomes Bordashundari. I can understand if Mohini auntie wants to call Sucharitha as the more orthodox Radha Rani, but I am not sure if once girls come off a particular age, people start addressing them differently or is it something Tagore wants to tell us?

I must however confess I have a slight misgiving about this book. I thought that the hero of the book was not really the hero. Chance shaped him to become the hero toward the end. I feel that Paresh Babu was in fact the real hero of the book, followed by Binoy and only after that did Gora please me.

And whats with these Bongolis always having a "B" and a "O" in place of "V" and "A". Lalitha becomes Lolita. Lavanya becomes a Labonya. Vinay becomes a Binoy. Pranam becomes a Pronam :)...

India is so rich with all these subtle beauties in mother tongues. I guess Tamil will be Tamizh and Bengali will be Bongoli.

I plan to read "A House for Mr. Biswas" by V.S.Naipaul next...would soon post its review...

Motta Podu!

2006-11-23T23:39:00.000-08:00

Ever had your head shaven off because your Grandmother prayed to Lord Muruga that she will take you to Palani if you scored good marks in 12th standard?

Welcome to the club!

These Grandmas have no right to pray with our hair at stake! Its like a win win situation for them while it is a lose lose for us.

It starts when you are one year old. The first "mottai" takes place in your paternal "kula Dheivam kovil" (paternal family side temple). For me it was in Ukkadai when I was one year old.

Then the next "mottai" when you reach the age of two in your maternal temple.

Then the third one when you are three years old in your moms favourite temple...

This goes on until everyone has their say with your hair....

At last comes Tirupathi. Lord of all lords to whom almost everyone loses their hair.

This is something guys can never escape from! Atleast girls are relieved of all this once they are 3-4 years old.

When I had my "last" "mottai" in Tirupathi I thought "Phew! finally !"

Little did I know that the second round of "Mottai" is just going to start with my younger brother turning one year old.

My grandma says "The little one is getting a mottai. Why not the elder also. It is always good to sacrifice your hair to God. So come ....sit down, "onakkum motta" "

:(

And this happened for another full round when finally I began to wonder if my hair would ever grow up at this rate.

Finally the Tirpathi round of my brother came and I was happy that it was all going to be over soon.

Little did I know, my Grandma had other prayers in mind! :)

Jokes apart : Having the head shaven off has actually turned out to be good. Till now havent faced the problem of baldness.Touchwood!. The Egyptians had this practice and I read somewhere that it is good if suns rays shine on your head directly. It is also good to remove dandruffs. Perhaps my grandmas prayers really were a win win for me. :)

Perseverance

2006-11-22T01:50:00.000-08:00

So, when I use this word, who are you reminded of?

Mahmud Ghajini? or perhaps Alexander? Or perhaps king William?

I am reminded of the Call center lady who calls me up everyday in the faintest of the hope that I would take a personal loan, home loan or perhaps my 5th credit card.

"Good morning sir. I am calling from ICICI regarding personal loans"
"Sorry not interested" [ click ]

"Good afternoon sir. This is regarding personal loans sir. I am calling from ICICI bank"
"You just called me before sometime" [ click ]
"Good evening sir. Would you be interested in taking a personal loan from ICICI"
"I just told you not to disturb me a few hours ago" [ click ]

After being mauled with these questions over the past few months, I have now decided to have some fun.

So, today when the HDFC call center lady called me up:

CC Lady: "Good morning sir. I am calling from HDFC bank. We have an excellent offer for you sir. This is regarding a home loan which we are giving without any collateral"
Me : "Hmm, thats great , so does that mean I dont have to repay the loan?"
CCL : "Oh no sir. :). You have to repay the loan sir. But we dont take a collateral for the loan sir"
Me : "What is a collateral?"
CCL : "Sir in case you donot pay the loan amount we usually have an agreement to take into custody some of your existing property. We will not ask for any such thing now sir"
Me : "Then what will you do if I run off with your loan?"
CCL : "No sir. How will you do that"
Me : "You want a demonstration?"
CCL : "No sir. I meant we trust that you will not do that?"
Me : "Do you trust me?"
CCL : "Sir, no sir, the bank trusts you"
Me : "No I asked if YOU trust me"
CCL : "Sir I am confused. I dont know you sir"
Me : "Then what will you do if I run off with your loan?"
CCL : "Sir, the bank will lodge a police complaint against you in that case"
Me : "But what if the police never catch me. What will happen to you then? Will the bank not blame you for making me take this loan?"
CCL : "Sir it does not matter to me if you take loan or run away with the money. Nothing will happen to me"
Me : "Then why did you make the phone call in the first place"
CCL : [ click ]

Next day it was the turn of the Personal Loan woman from the ICICI bank:

CCL : "Good afternoon sir. I am calling from ICICI bank. This is regarding personal loan sir."
Me : "So what exactly is a personal loan?"
CCL : "Sir, you can use it for your personal purposes"
Me : "So how personal is it?"
CCL : "Sir? huh?"
Me : "What personal purposes exactly are you referring to?"
CCL : "Sir, you can buy anything with that money sir"
Me : "Hmm, I am looking at buying a helicopter. How much money do you give?"
CCL : "Sir, helicopter?...uh...wait a minute sir...it is not given in the list...(oops). Sir you can buy whatever you want sir. "
Me : "Ok give me 2 crores"
CCL : " Sir we can only give upto Rs. 1 lakh sir"
Me : "What? with 1 lakh I cant even fill up the gas in the helicopter"
CCL : "Sir, remaining amount you have to put in sir"
Me : "You just said that I can buy whatever I want. I want to buy a helicopter. You better provide me the loan needed for that or else I am suing you"
CCL : [ click ]

Then it was Citibanks turn :

CCL : "Good evening sir. I am calling from Citibank. We are issuing you a free Gold Credit card because you are our esteemed customer. Lifetime membership free sir"
Me : "How much carat gold are we talking about here? 24?"
CCL : "Sir, not that gold sir. Gold Card"
Me : "Ya, how much does it weigh?"
CCL : "Sir, you undestood wrongly. This is a credit card which is called Gold credit card"
Me : "Why do you call it Gold card if it is not made of Gold?"
CCL : "Sir one minute sir"
CCL : "Sir Gold card is called Gold because it is very valuable sir"
Me : "How is it valuable?"
CCL : "Sir using this card you can buy anything sir"
Me : "Hmm. So can I buy a shirt?"
CCL : "Of course sir"
Me : "A Pant?"
CCL : "Yes sir"
Me : "Both shirt and pant?"
CCL : "Yes sir"
Me : "How about vegetables?"
CCL : "Sir you can buy whatever you want sir."
Me : "A chair?"
CCL : "Yes sir"
Me : "Dining table" ?...
CCL :"Yes sir"
Me : "TV"
.....
..
..
CCL : "Yes sir, yes sir yes sir. You can buy whatever you want sir"
Me : "Hmm, thats interesting. I am not interested. "
[ click ]

Finally I thought I was rid of the problem. Today morning I receieved a call:

Automated Voice at the other end:
"Hiiiiii . A very good day to you. This is the automated message from ICICI that allows you to choose from a set of options that we have to offer you. For personal loan please click 1. For home loan please click 2..."

:(

Jokes apart, Man there should be some way we can specify to these banks not to bug us with these calls. I dont know how and why our phone numbers are shared within these banks and they make these cranky calls.

I think banks would get higher profits if they donot spend so much money on these phone calls.

Secondly , out of a humanitarian concern for these Call Center people I really do hope these things are not done. I am really sad about the thing people have to do or are made to do. I know that it provides employment to many people. I really wish I could suggest some brilliant ways to make use of the human capital. But is this true employment? Educated people made to call someone and ask if the want loans/credit cards? Is our country letting the brains rot? I am reminded of egyptian slaves. It is said that the Pharaohs had discoverd the secrets of the steam engine but kept it a secret from these slaves, lest they become lazy. They did not want the job done with the steam engine but rather preferred that slaves do the job.

And ya, last but definitely not the least:
ICICI/HDFC/Citibank --> I already have a home loan. I have 4 credit cards, 3 debit cards. I have a TV, Fridge and am not planning to marry in the next couple of years. With no offence to the poor people who call me, but with full offense to these corportates, please bugger off and dont disturb me.

My MBA Journey - I

2006-07-11T02:36:00.000-07:00

This is one side of my life that I have never blogged about. My MBA Journey. Two years into this journey I am getting more serious by the day.

I have rarely blogged about this aspect of my life partly because I am yet to achieve something in this area. But now I get the feeling that this is a big aspect of my life and I need to pen down some of my thoughts.

Being an Indian, competition is something I have faced right from the day I went for my Kinder Garden :). Believe it or not, if you are an Indian, if you dont grab the first bite, you dont get a second bite. Fierce competition would be an understatement.

This is most visible in the case of an admit to one of the top B Schools in India, namely the IIMs. I come one of the top colleges in India for engineering, i.e BITS Pilani, and have met some of the best brains in the country there. The BITSian culture has had a great impact on me, and becoming a big shot in the industry one day has sort of become my dream.

I always thought gaining some experience is a must before you get into a B school , and I still believe experience is something that is very valuable for an MBA. The reason is quite simple, if you are just fresh out of college, you donot know one bit about working in projects, being in a team, meeting deadlines, paying taxes, facing real life competition (mind you there is a difference between competition at college and competition at work, ....at college it does not make much difference if you get an A grade or a B grade, but it hurts bad when someone says your work is anything but outstanding), and an exposure to industry and business in general. Also, one matures as one gains work experience and can really decide what one wants to do with his/her life.

The advantage of doing an MBA without work-ex is perhaps that one might still be in touch with the education process (studying long hours etc.) , and the math would be strong. But the actual value that one derives out of the course I believe is lesser for a non-experienced.

Anyways, my journey began while I was into roughly a couple of years of experience. I belong to a very common background - a middle class, engineering graduate with IT experience. I started out by taking the Common Admissions Test (an entrance to some of the TOP colleges in India). My journey started by attending classes to crack the CAT at the TIME institute at Hyderabad.
The very first impression I had when I joined the training was that Math was going to be a nightmare in clearing the CAT exam.

I prepared hard for the Math part of it (we call it Quantitative, and Data Interpretation). I have a decent hold in my English abilities, so I did not spend too much time for preparing for the English part of it. I used to score somewhere in the top 3 odd percentile of students writing the exam and I Was fairly confident of my clearing the entrance.

The D day came. Nov 20 2004. The test : Objective type 150 odd marks. CAT is always known to spring surprises and there was a big bombshell waiting to explode that year. They had introduced a differential marking scheme. Till the year before it was always one markers.

We had to take a spot decision whether to go for low risk low yield 1 markers or high risk high yield 2 markers. I took a higher risk in the English as I was always good at it, and took the low risk route in the Math. My scores finally read : Quantitative : 97 percentile. Data Interpretation : 99 percentile. English : 89 percentile. Overall : 98.43 percentile.

With two years of experience in a multinational, I thought I would certainly get atleast 2-3 calls from the IIMs (I did not try for the lower rung colleges in India, because I did not think their programs were a good fit for me). I got 0 calls. I was even more surprised that year, when many people managed to get a call from these institutes even though their overall score was much less than mine. I could not find out where I really missed out and it left a very bad taste after almost 6 months of practising for the exams went down the drain.

However, I had gained a lot of experience from this exam. I gave another attempt at it. Nov 21 2005. Another bombshell. Too less questions. Tougher exam, and increased ambiguity in some of the English questions. From the earlier experience, I decided to go into spending more time in English, as they seemed to give more preference to it and that was the costly mistake I did in this paper, because apparently, this year I should have given lesser importance to it since it was of very high difficulty level.

Another blotched attempt. My score read Quantitative : 96. DI 92 English 92 and overall 97

But surprise came in the form of an interview call from arguably one of the best institutes in India , the IIM B. I gave it a good shot. Got great recommendations from my seniors. Wrote well thought out essays. And was quite well prepared on the day of the interview. But somehow I could not get in....so will try once more....

More to continue.....

My take on Reservation

2006-07-04T23:17:00.000-07:00

For a long time I have not blogged and I wanted to start with a decent topic :)...what better one to choose than the one that we have argued so much about....

My opinion on reservation is pretty straightforward : Reservation is an oxymoron and people who think reservation would help alleviate poverty/reduce caste based discrimination/give an equal opportunity etc. are morons.

Arguments which make me give out the above line:

1) First of all let us see why Reservation will not help alleviate poverty :

Consider Rural Poverty First:
a) I have a teammate who tells me that he is from a remote village in UP and he does not even know that there is a college called IIM or for that matter IIT until he finished his B.E (from a college in Mathura). Much of Indias populace is in Rural India, and much of the poverty is in these places.

For the fact oriented people, refer the following link1 , link 2 , link 3

It says:
"However, ruralpoverty remains stubbornly persistent, with the headcount ratio being 42.7 per cent in 1993/94(Dubey and Gangopadhyay 1998). More troubling is the concentration of rural poverty in India in the ‘scheduled caste’ (SC) and ‘scheduled tribe’( ST) population. Though striking, it may not besurprising, since the scheduled groups have historically faced discrimination. Since 1950,affirmative action programs have been at the core of Indian social policy towards the these twosocial groups. According to the 1991 Census of India, scheduled castes and scheduled tribescomprise 16.5 percent and 8.1 percent respectively of India’s population, yet about 43.53 per centof India’s rural poor are concentrated in these two social groups. The proportion of SC and ST households below the poverty line were 49.0 and 49.5 per cent respectively, as compared to a poverty rate of 32.8 per cent for non-scheduled households. There exists a gap in the proportion living in poverty (a ‘ poverty gap’) of 16.2 percent (=49.0-32.8)between SC and non-scheduled households, and a ‘poverty gap’ of 16.7 percent (=49.5-32.8)between ST and non-scheduled households. One major task in the fight to reduce rural poverty is,therefore, to close the gap in poverty rates between scheduled castes and tribes and the nonscheduledgroup."

On the following points, I and the government agree.
i.e
1) Rural Poverty is very high (as compared to urban...urban poverty I will visit soon). - I accept
2) Rural poverty is more concentrated toward the SC and STs. - I accept

Now my question:
1) The reservation has been done for OBCs....now if the poverty concentration is more toward SCs and STs...where did the OBCs come into picture...although...I am still against reserving for the SC and STs too in the IIMs/AIIMs/and IITs because of point 2
2) These people who are in the village dont even KNOW these colleges exist. I have some rural relatives, who think passing the 10th class is a significant achievement, while in my house, anything but getting top ranks in some of the best institutes is considered mediocre.

The rural poor, about whom I am talking are the ones, who
1) DONOT HAVE TV
2) DONOT HAVE PROPER CLOTHING
3) THEY ARE UNSURE OF HOW THE NEXT DAY MEAL IS GOING TO ARRIVE
4) They donot know how to put their signature
5) They just know one language, their mother tongue, and that too only to speak in it

If you go and ask them who is Mahatma Gandhi, there is a good chance that 50% of these people don't know him. Yes. It may seem surprising, but it is true. Now if you RESERVE some seats in the IIMs/IITs/AIIMs, does it benefit these poor people who form nearly 50% of India's population?

There is a tremendous divide between the rural and the urban people and believe me I have seen it with my eyes.

My "Kula Deivam" i.e my hereditary deity is in a remote village called Ukkadai in Tamil Nadu. It is close to Madurai. In that village the head priest of the temple there has children and grandchildren attending school. They go to a school which is roughly 30 KMs in a town called Ammapettai. There is no school in that 30SQ KM area. They go in a bullock cart and get back in the same.

Whenever I visit the place our car goes through rough roads to reach the village, and the Summer can be extremely punishing if you go in a open bullock cart carrying a school bag daily to school. Those kids, who have rarely seen a 4 wheeler start running behind our car and chase us :) whenever we go there. After we reach the place, I give those kids a ride in our AC car, and they get very excited by that. It gives me great pleasure to see the smile on their face when I give them a ride in our car. To expect these people to know what an IIM is, is truly laughable.

I grew up in Chennai for the most part of my life. I myself heard of BITS Pilani for the first time when I reached my 12th class because my father was discussing the various options I have for education with some of his friends. These villagers , believe me, don't know shit about IIT/IIM etc...they think going to a college is a great achievement. The divide is much much more than what we urban people can really comprehend. Reserving a bunch of seats in these institutes is a laugh in the face of efforts to reduce poverty.

b) Next is the lack of Primary and Secondary education. What has the government done to improve these? I have seen in a serial called "Visu's Arattai Arangam", umpteen number of times, that there are no schools in many of the villages. If at all they need to get education, they need to travel many kilometers to the nearest big town where there is a school. To reach that town , they donot have proper roads/buses etc running. During harsh weather , reaching the school becomes impossible for these people. What has the government done to first educate these poor? In NDTV 24*7 this is what Infosys, Narayanamurthy was mentioning in the serial called BIG Fight and I fully agree with him.

c) Even with these odds, some brightest minds do manage to score a decent enough score to manage a seat in some of these colleges. I am full of appreciation for them and words are not enough to appreciate their sincerity. But....and it is a big but....their trouble does not end with acquiring a seat. There is a great difference between a Rank 1 from a village and a Rank 100 in a school like DAV in Chennai. Once these two people are put in the same college, I have seen many professors who oppose reservation tell in their interviews to various news channels that the people coming through reservation really struggle to get the grades necessary to pass their course. Most colleges follow a relative grading process, and quality of Urban education will take its toll on the poor quality of the rural education.

To sum up We have seen that the rural poor donot benefit from reservation because of the following reasons:
a) Lack of knowledge about these institutes in the first place
b) Lack of proper Primary education/Secondary education
c) Even those that manage to make use of the reservation, find difficulty to finish their course in these top colleges

Now to the Urban Poor:

Except for the fact that these people have managed to come to the cities, points about their ignorance of these institutes still holds good. Though they have a better access to quality schooling, i.e great primary schools may be available in every street, they still donot have enough money to send their kids to school and thereby point b still stays. And here too, those that stay hungry but go to school and manage to utilise the reservation from the government, feel very out of place in these institutes not because this time it is because of the diffculty of the course, but because they cannot afford to live like their richer counterparts in these very institutes. There have been incidences of suicides because students go into tremendous mental pressure because of their poor background and they decide to take these extreme steps.

So to sum up, the poor are not really benefitted, and even if a very small franction do get benefitted, reservation is the slowest way among any other policy which the government can frame toward alleviating poverty.

2) The point I want to discuss is about the utter absurdity of reservation: Take the following excerpt from a newspaper

"According to National Sample Survey's 1999-2000 round around 36 per cent of the country's population is defined as belonging to the Other Backward Classes (OBC). The proportion falls to 32 per cent on excluding Muslim OBCs. A survey conducted in 1998 by National Family Health Statistics (NFHS) puts the proportion of non-Muslim OBCs as 29.8 per cent"

So , we have some 27 odd percentage + the 5 odd percent existing already for OBCs, and added together that makes it 32%. So the government says , for the 32% of the people we reserve 32% of the seats.

Wow, that is just great. That means that in any subset of student pool of any batch, roughly 32% of the students would be OBCs and they all now have seats, provided as many seats are there.

The absurdity that I talk about will make a clearer sense if you take this example:

Consider that about 98% of the people belong to OBC (which would mean the whole country is backward....nothing could be more pathetic). And assume government says that 98% of the seats are reserved for this community.

So? What does this really achieve. Nothing. Except that the remaining 2 % of the population may not get any seat because potentially that could also be eaten by the remaining 98%. You are in fact killing the remaining 2 % by doing this. Also, the 98% does not get benefitted much, because they compete with THEMSELVES.

There were roughly 26 castes identified under Backward caste in Tamil Nadu during independence. Now the list has 273 castes. Tomorrow it will be 20000. How is the government going to really identify who is backward and who is not? Reservation spurs casteism more than it does to remove it.

50 odd percent of the country is either BC or OBC , and 50% seats are reserved. What nonsense is this? This year, in the Post Graduation medical exam in Andhra, only the state 1st rank (who was from a forward caste), was able to manage the seat. The STATE BLOODY second rank could not get the seat. How pathetic is this?

3) The next absurdity about reservation is that it helps alleviate caste based discrimination. Bull Shit. In villages, this still goes on. Your giving reservation in IITs and IIMs is not going to change the way the poor dalits are treated in the villages.

Coming to think of it, the dalits are not the ones given reservation, it is rather the OBCs. Which in itself is another farce.

Even if this does eliminate discrimination, all it does is sow the seeds of anger and desperation in the hearts of those really capable students who were denied a seat due to reservation. These people will be the next generation dalits.

So this really is going to be a chain rather than eliminating discrimination.

Untouchability and reservation in IITs are rubber and glue. Totally unrelated. Even the extremely innocent people will not buy this argument. To eliminate untouchability, the government has to take other steps....not reserve seats in some colleges.

4) Nowadays, there is an overwhelming majority of Backward classes in Politics, and they seem to be the ones doing the oppression of Forward castes now. It is really a reveral of roles, and what happened many years ago is not happening the other way round.

5) Ok, lets forget about all this, and get back to the point of oppression that was followed for 1000s of years as claimed by these so called pundits.

Let me take my own example:

I am a forward caste. My great grand parents/grand parents used to live in a place called RajaPaiyyan Chaavadi (a remote village in TN). There was no electricity in their house. There was no means of transport but for bullock cart, which they also borrowed whenever they visit the neighbouring village. They used a "Hurricane Lamp", and they were also poor farmers. What crap ass discrimination makes them forward caste, and what greater benefits did they enjoy than these so called OBCs, who also perhaps stayed in a mud hut, and did pretty much the same things.

The amount of entertainment that can be bought today with money is very much more compared to that in those days. Though I accept there were cruel things carried out such as not allowing dalits inside temples, not allowing them to use water etc, ECONOMICALLY the divide was not huge. In fact it really was not there. Both pretty much were farmers or potters etc. In fact, a few generations back, (I am a brahmin), brahmins used to BEG FOR THEIR FOOD. So if brahmins are called forward castes, my God, are they the most pathetic of the lot. Their ancestors were beggars for like 4000 years . And now they continute to beg for seats to this day :)

Reservation is now causing an economic divide as well. The people who benefit from OBC/BC/SC/ST quotas are the third generation of people benefitting from the same.

I have seen with my eyes, a student getting into IIT with a horrible score. His dad got into a great Manager job in Telecom, and his grand dad was a doctor. How is this justified?

6) Another interesting thing is that, we had this discussion once in an official lunch, (with my teammates). All of them seemed to oppose reservation, and I asked "How many of you are BC's", and believe me, half of them raised their hands. Even they feel there is no need for reservation once a generation has benefitted. Moreover, the divide is very less and nobody, atleast in Urban areas can tell the difference of castes unless someone tells it out openly.

7) I read this interesting thing in Wikipedia:

"Reservationists argument of great inequalities in the society is totally wrong. GINI index is the term used to measure inequality. GINI index for India is healthy 0.32(As per CIA fact book).GINI index in India is much lesser than many European countries,USA,Singapore and communist countries like China,Russia etc. "

When there is so less an inequality then wots the point of reservation? Whether or not all are equally pathetic or well off is another question altogether.

8) Wikipedia has many other interesting points to offer. I am pasting them from there:

a) Reservation decisions in India are never taken with scientific basis.Independent surveys indicate Lingayats and Vokkaligas of Karnataka,Jats of Rajastan,Nadars of Tamilnadu are economically sound than forward caste clan. So always reservation decisions are taken keeping political interests in mind
b) that allocating quotas on the basis of caste is a form of racial discrimination which is contrary to the right to equality.
c) that as a consequence, legislation for providing reservation for Christians and Muslim religious minorities in all government education institutions will be introduced, which is contrary to the ideas of secularism, and is a form of discrimination on the basis of religion.
d) .that most often, only the economically sound people (and rather rich) from the so-called lower castes will make use of most of the reserved the seats, thus making the aim a total failure. Political parties know reservations are no way to improve the lot of the poor and the backward. They support them because of self-interest of the “creamy layer”, who use the reservations to further their own family interests, and as a political flag of ‘achievement’ during election campaigns.[11] In fact, several studies show that the OBC class is quite comparable with the general caste in terms of annual per capita consumption expenditure, and the top strata of OBC is ahead in a host of consumption areas.
e) that the quality of these elite institutes may go down, because merit is severely being compromised by reserving seats for certain caste-based communities.

Would you prefer a Backward caste student who scored 40% marks in medical entrance to perform the heart operation of your mother or a 98% student who was denied admission.

f) that the government is dividing people on the basis of castes for political advantages
g) that this can also lead to prolonged reservation system indefinitely.
h) that, the caste system is kept alive through these measures. Instead of coming up with alternative innovative ideas which make sure equal representation at the same time making the caste system irrelevant, the decision is only fortifying the caste system.
i) that the autonomy of the educational institutes are lost
j) that not everyone from the so-called upper class are rich, and not all from so called lower classes are poor
k) that this policy of the government will also increase the phenomenon of Brain Drain from India and the under graduates and graduates will start moving to foreign universities for higher education.This will be in such a case a great set back and will have the most devastating affects on Indian education and economy
l) that multi-national companies will be deterred by this action of the government,and foreign investment in India may dry down, hurting the growth of the Indian economy. Doubtless, urgent actions to improve the lot of the majority, which has not benefited from development — not achieved after 55 years of reservations for scheduled castes — are essential. But this must not hazard improving the economy’s competitiveness in a very competitive world.
m) there are already talks of reservations in the private sector.If even after providing so many facilities to reserved categories during education, if there is no adequate representation of those people in the work force, there must be some problems with the education system. Unfortunatley, in India government never seems to address real issues involved.

Well, for now I think I have already said a lot of things. I am pretty much exhausted with this huge post, I think this is one of the biggest I have typed. I would come back with more later once I get some other relevant points.

Tia
cb

Yet another internet test

2006-06-07T22:09:00.000-07:00

You scored as Cultural Creative. Cultural Creatives are probably the newest group to enter this realm. You are a modern thinker who tends to shy away from organized religion but still feels as if there is something greater than ourselves. You are very spiritual, even if you are not religious. Life has a meaning outside of the rational.

Cultural Creative

75%

Idealist

69%

Existentialist

63%

Modernist

50%

Postmodernist

38%

Materialist

31%

Romanticist

25%

Fundamentalist

25%

What is Your World View? (updated)
created with QuizFarm.com

A cry for peace

2006-03-08T02:00:00.000-08:00

The bomb blast today in Varanasi is yet another chapter in the terrorist attacks that happen worldwide.

This is a cry for peace.

A cry that begs these proponents of violence to desist whatever they are doing now.

I beg of you to leave innocent children alone.

Their mothers alone.

Their fathers alone.

Why do you want to kill? Do you think the God that created you would want you to destroy another of his wonderful creation?

We are all the children of God. Why do we kill each other.

Let peace prevail.

Let the innocent smile light up the lives of those around.

signing off with a silent prayer
-cb

The Kite Runner

2006-02-15T23:00:00.000-08:00

I read this book in one sitting to win a bet with my roommate :). I finished it in about 5 odd hours. Fortunately, it was not one of those boring books which you just can't read more than a few pages. Overall it was a good read. A fiction. But a good fiction. Set in a Pre-Taliban era to present in Afghanistan, the story has been written well.

Spoiler Warning : I am gonna discuss this book here on. So don't read unless you want to spoil the suspense.

Positives about the book :

I felt that the book was good in the sense that it could potentially leave a mark on some people. The sadness that war can bring over a nation is well portrayed. It is a sad thing that man eats man. The division of caste/creed/religion etc which breaks men apart into small islands has been well portrayed. I really do hope we are heading toward a future that has no such divides.

Anyways, the reticent and cowardly nature of Amir and his direct opposite of a bold and loyal half brother Hassan has been portrayed real well. Baba (Amir's father) , a towering man who defies the world is a irony. A man with two lives. One of a person who stands tall amidst men and defies commonly accepted opinions with his own views about world. Another of a man who stands ashamed by his own sins and leads a half life. A life frought with secrets. Rahim Khan, a romantic, a defiant soul, perhaps the better half of Baba and last but not the least the ever loyal servant Ali.

I would like to read something about the history and life of Afghanistan from the same author. This book is only about a story and peripherally touches upon the Afghan life during the Taliban era. Perhaps an indepth coverage would interest me more.

When Baba says every sin in this world can be explained as a form of theft I liked it. It is one step behind Krishna saying in the Bhagavad Gita that everything stems from a Desire. Or rather, what Baba says is a wrapper of what Krishna says (hmm...Software programming does leave an impact on you doesn't it...when I start speaking of wrapper I am reminded of packages in PL/SQL :) )

Negatives :

Although I would not say this is a negative of the story, I would say that the character of Baba is that of a Hypocrite. A man who has his servants' wife for his pleasure , has no right to speak up for someone else's wife when a Russian attempts to take her. Maybe he is trying to cover up his earlier sins. But what he has done was clearly unjustifiable.

Also, 12 odd year old kids engaging in sexual acts is a bit unbelievable, especially given the setting of the story (1970s when there is no TV or excessive exposure to Porn and the society is very orthodox). Especially the homosexual behaviour of Assef was a bit unbelievable.

Last but not the least, I sort of expected a more dramatic ending, but it was a pretty plain expected sort of an ending to a nice story.

Rang Diya Basanti

2006-02-12T21:51:00.000-08:00

Saw the movie "Rang de basanthi" yesterday and what am I to say :)....

After BLACK this is the first movie to really make an impression on me. Especially in the context of my earlier posts, this movie really moved me and sort of gave some good points on the question of Patriotism.

The great things about this movie are the performances by the artistes was just superb! All of them, Alice Patten (alias Sue) , Aamir (alias DJ), Sidharth (alias Karan).....

The next good thing was that it was a very natural movie with no jumping from the 45th story to catch the villain along the 28th floor to finally jump to the floor unscathed fundas. Whatever happened in the reel life, could possibly happen in real life.

And as far as I am concerned, it gave me more food for my thoughts on the topic of patriotism as I stand questioning it as to how much sense it makes today.

I think that after the movie the importance of a common struggle for independence stands out as one of the most important reasons for the concept of a Nation. It is not a minor point which one can brush aside as part of an argument. Imagine the struggle of millions of people to liberate us. They shed blood so I can sit in front of this computer and write this blog.

There was one line from Aamir, which stood out in this whole movie "Yaar, duniya me sirf dho tharah ke log hote hain. Ek jo bahar baitkar tamasha dekthe hain our dhoosre jo andhar aakar system ko teekh karne kee koshish karthe hain" (not exactly the same words, but along the lines...).

What it means for non-Hindi people, is that "In this world there are essentially two kinds of people. Those who sit outside the system and make fun of it, and those who step out and try to cleanse it". It is left to us to choose who we want to be.

There were some other very strong words that moved me a lot.

"I have only seen people die in two ways. One where they scream to their deaths. Other where they die in silence. But today, I saw the third kind. " (that of smiling to your deaths)
--- The Britisher's words as he hanged Bismil and Ashfaq Ullah Khan

Bhagat,Rajguru etc were tortured for 114 days! My God!

I loved it again when the Britisher said "They did not fear death.......There is a strange peace that these men seemed to enjoy."

Had they found true peace when they chose to die for what they believed in?

Is this what self-realization is all about?

Perhaps they were closer to Godliness than are most so called God-men.

To think about it, I havent seen too many movies on Independence struggle. Maybe just 1 or 2, and that too was centered around Gandhi. Right now, Patriotism makes a lot of sense to me. But there is still one thing that nags me.

Pakistan should be with India. We should not be India and Pakistan. We should be Industan. They are our brothers. They shared the struggle with us. Why then did they want a separate country? I think I am now going to read about the partition more and get back with more points...because I seriously dont see how we lost our brothers and are now fighting with those very same people...

Anyways, the movie was damn good. Sure worth the money. Please watch it in the Theatres and not in "Thiruttu VCDs" :)

Traffic oh poor Traffic!

2006-02-10T01:56:00.000-08:00

Hyderabad is one of the best places in India to be in. It is a place where almost everyone seems to know basic Hindi (so if you know Hindi you would have no problems). Also the food is too good. Especially the Biryani. Climate as well is wonderful (barring a few weeks during May/June)

But, if there is one thing which is pathetic in Hyderabad, it is the Traffic. Ironically, Hyderabad has one of the best roads in India (especially from the Punjagutta Chutneys to the Hitec City). I have been to Bangalore/Mumbai/Delhi/Chennai and various other places. And I think the best roads are perhaps to be found here at Hyderabad. Chennai has some good roads along the Marina Beach and a 6 way lane is coming up next to the Tidal Park which promises to be good. Delhi has some good roads along the Red Fort (Which is quite understandable :) )

Anyways, enough deviation. Back to the topic at hand.

Traffic!

I had hopes that the traffic would some day become better, even when I suffered an accident where some idiot came right into the middle of the road without any signals and without seeing behind as to who is coming. I had hopes some day even after the umpteen number of times I have seen people going in the wrong side of the road (another accident here where my bike suffered a minor scratch and a twisted mirror). But recently my hope was shattered and I Will tell why.

My Blood Pressure meter shoots to 180 , 10 minutes into a drive and it reaches volcanic levels when in peak hour traffic.

In tamil we call it "Cycle Gap la auto Ottaradhu"....if you want to know what that means you are welcome to Hyderabad.

The worst part of the worst traffic is the Autos. In Bangalore, if the policeman sees an auto carrying more than 3 people, that is the end of the auto wallahs days earnings. In Chennai it is even better. Autos would not even take more than 3 people for fear of the police.

And now to the reason why I lost my hope. The greatest tragedy of Hyderabad Police happened a few days ago, when I saw a bloody Traffic Policeman himself get onto an Auto in the front as the Fifth rider !!!!!

My God, was I shocked!.... I feel the traffic police here are the prime reason for this sorry state of affairs. If Autos are heavily fined then there would be a lot of accidents prevented.

Just the other day, my colleague came with a broken leg and upon investigating it was an auto crash when the auro tried to turn with 8 passengers!!! YES 8!!! EIGHT!!!! in a single auto.
No wonder it crashed.

Another friend of mine (his name is Balasubramaniam Chandrasekaran :) ...almost same as mine except in the "m" at the end of the first name).... had a broken arm a couple of months ago when the auto he was travelling carrying 5 people on board swerved and crashed with him at the bottom.

I was reminded of something called "AA vooo"(in my college) which means to sit on top of one another until the guy at the bottom is kind of squeezed :)....

It is only in Hyderabad that I see this kind of a take it easy attitude in the roads. There is a signal near Chermas, where it is a T junction.

Consider this diagram :

The above is a diagram of the road that I talk about (towards C is the Ameerpet Chermas, and towards D is the Hyderabad Central at Punjagutta). What happens here is that people can travel along D to C, E to B and A to E and B

The D to C signal lasts about a minute and E to B lasts about a minute. A to B is a free ride. But for A to E the signal is only for 15 seconds.

Sadly, the D to C traffic never stops when they see a red. So they stand near the "O" mark by the time they choose to stop and give the poor A to E travelling people the road. But the red light is back on for A to E, and now E to B will have a green. But since A to E was not allowed to cross, the dejected front row driver will decide "All right! you break the rule, then I too will!" and decides to join the party near O.

Now a minute is gone before this traffic settles and the Green is now for D to C. But E to C never got a chance to leave....and now they jump to O and block the road....and after a few minutes we find that no vehicle leaves :)....

If you happen to be in this road at around 7-9 PM on a weekday, you can as well switch off your engine and start reading your newspaper. You might get lucky at 9 PM and the Traffic Policeman who was supposed to stay there (but was having his evening "chaai") will come rushing in to resolve the crisis.

Why don't people stop when the signal is Orange?

What is this urgent need for people to stretch the rules? Can't people be civic enough to allow others the chance to peacefully claim what road is rightfully theirs during that slot?

The other day as I was standing in a signal, there was this bike who was just behind me and was blaring his horn asking me to move. I said that the signal is red and so I would not move. He started cursing me and said that he wanted to take a U turn and swore at me to leave. I just gave him a smile and showed him the Signal and told him to wait. I am sure he would have kicked me had he gotten the chance.

Also the Helmet rule that has been brought to Hyderabad (Phew!!!, something atleast!!!!) would remain useless until a basic civic sense is instilled into the Traffic Police first, and then the others in the road.

Anyways, as always, this does not mean all Hyderabadis are bad at the road. Neither are all policemen bad. The Traffic police about whom I blogged a few articles ago was a perfect gentleman.

Maybe it is just that I see a more bad than good things happen in these roads. :)

Patriotism - What is it? - II

2006-02-01T02:43:00.000-08:00

Hmm, I got a reply from KoPoS on this. A lot of valid points were mentioned in that.

Now clubbing together what I have said and Kopos has mentioned, let me try my hand at this topic once more.

As we try to define this particular word, we now come across a lot more confusion.

One definition we came at was: "Patriotism is an emotion, an attitude. Either you have it or you dont. And of course, as per me patriotism is just a sense of belonging to the state and more importantly that of that state belonging to you. Its about the rights but mainly in the responsibilities."

Is this not very close to something called "Religion" ? Religion too may be defined along these lines and said that it is an emotion. An Attitude. We have it or we dont. So if people who donot follow any religion, or who donot know if God exists or not, call themselves "Agnostics" and some who think God does not exist call themselves "Atheists" and still go about their daily lives without any issues, what then do we call people who donot believe in the concept of a nation/patriotism?

Jesus Christ was of this notion, so was Leo Tolstoy and so are so many monks today. In fact near Pondicherry there is an Ashram called as Auroville, where sand from various parts of the world is brought and a huge meditation center in the form of a globe is constructed. To stay there and be a part of Auroville means that you are declaring that you are a world citizen and one who has no allegiance to any specific nation whatsoever and are a brother of the whole world.

So is it that Patriotism is then a "Notion". A notion that has been nurtured and developed over a period of time so that a "Group" of people get together and try to prosper in a structured way. The concept of the whole is more than sum of parts may be of use here. i.e, when 4 people get together and form a team , then they tend to perform better than 4 indivuduals separately.

ok, so we have a definition of patriotism as a matter of convenience for general welfare and upliftment of a group of indivuduals. These indivuduals who swear allegiance to a group then call themselves as members of the nation.

Now, in this kind of a formation it is very fruitful, if by chance/through revolution, the members have a "Common Link", so that they can identify themselves with that link. The link could be that of religion (as in the case of Arab Nations), or it could be that of a common tongue (Chinese), or it could be a common ancestral civilisation and a history of togetherness in geography (Britain).

Now throughout the world, we see that there is a problem when this "Common Link" is missing . That is when we face issues. Take Yogoslavia. Take Sri Lanka. Take Israel/Palestine.

However, there are countries where the common link is missing, and yet still stand united.

For these nations what I ask is, "Is it then a question of time before they break apart ?" - We have seen that during the storm Katrina , in the US, Blacks and Whites clearly stood separated black and white. What we saw in France during the recent communal riots, was an indication that perhaps civilisation is nothing but a set of barbarians eating with Fork and Spoon. In a matter of days riots are breaking out. People of different religion or tongue quarrel.

Coming to the case of India....there are lot of things which we can discuss here as well.

Now if we take common ancestry , I do agree that we had a large part of the nation influenced by the Indus Valley civilisation. But then, why are Pakistan/Bhutan/Nepal/Myanmar and Bangaldesh not part of this nation. They ought to be. If we consider the geography, they were ruled atleast in part during history by Mauryas and Mughals.

In fact, Chola Traders had very good relations with Malays, and to this day Tamil is one of Malaysias Official languages.

So as of the present, history and geography donot completely provide a complete justification for Indias present boundary. In fact, after the 70s war with Pakistan and China, China conquered thousands of square kilometers of J& K and handed them over to Pak, and it even captured parts of Arunachal and Assam ,which it has handed it over back to us. Now, what of those lands? Do they not atleast "Rightfully" belong to India?

The reason for the whole conflict in the J&K would be that the Hindu Rulers during the independence swore allegiance with India, but the populace was largely Muslim, and Pak wants a bite of the cake. I dont take a stand on this issue, saying that either of them is correct, but my question is more toward the concept of "Boundary" and a "Nation".

Israel has taken a mountain peak from Syria and refuses to hand it over....so who does it belong to? is it Israel because it has military might? or is it Syria because of a historical claim to the land?

Tamils want a portion of Lanka and Sinhala claims it is their motherland and no share would be given to anyone.

So are we then seeing a failure of the concept of nations?

We saw USSR break apart. We saw so many other nations disintegrating to smaller ones....

Are we to learn some lesson from that? Is Big necessarily Better?

I would attribute a part of Indias success as a democracy to its concept of States and a State Government. A state government is a sort of mini government within a government which is providing the much needed identity to a person. The concept of a state in a sense comforts people that they too are being fairly represented and are being noticed.

Even here we saw what has happened to Uttaranchal, Jharkand and Chattisgarh and what could potentially happen to Telengana.

So we see that the success of a nation lies in an "Identity" for its members. Its members need to feel safe. Need to feel noticed. Need to see that they too matter in the whole. If that does not happen, then a nation tends to fail.

When a nation/state neglects a part of its populace, a struggle for a separate identity ensues, and what results is either a new state or a nation. There is absolutely no business of saying that there is a sort of a "Feeling" of oneness. When you are hungry, you want food first. Next you think of development. Nobody says, "All right, I will remain hungry , and let the nation prosper". As Bharatiyar says "If one man is hungry, may the whole world stay hungry". So as long as the last man in a nation is not hungry, the nation is potentially capable of falling apart at any point of time and patriotism along with it.

In the end, the way I would define this word is perhaps : Patriotism is a notion of togetherness that is created for convenience and for common good and prosperity of the group that calls itself one.

As long as it is a positive attitude that says "All right, I will try to improve by working hard to raise myself" , rather than a negative one of "All right, I will try to improve by working hard to lower others", it would do good. The moment that rule is violated, we will see many more Lankas/Kashmirs and Israels.

After I say all this, I tend to think that a World Economy may perhaps not be a great solution in one sense, that it would again tend to break apart due to the "Identity crisis" I have mentioned earlier. Perhaps only when all men completely believe that they all came from the same mother at some point of time will this concept tend to succeed. If not, it may remain just a wishful thought.

Patriotism - What is it?

2006-01-09T22:57:00.000-08:00

A lot of times I have wondered about the answer to this question . I have had a lot of arguments with some of my friends about this topic. Some of them believed that Patriotism very much exists while others just thought it was nothing but bull shit.

Is patriotism all about just singing your national anthem, and supporting your country in sports?

What exactly is the definition of this word?

Wikipedia defines it as this:

Patriotism denotes positive attitudes by a individuals to their own nation, to its national homeland, its culture, its members, and to its interests. The word is derived from the Latin patria, fatherland, which has a much broader meaning than a geographical territory.

Dictionary definition of a nation is something along the lines of "love of country and willingness to sacrifice for it"

So as we see, both these definitions involve the concept of a "Nation"...

Now my doubt in the definition of Patriotism first lies in the definition of Nation.

Wiki says here that:

One of the most influential doctrines in history is that all humans are divided into groups called nations. It is an ethical and philosophical doctrine in itself, and is the starting point for the ideology of nationalism. The nationals (the members of the "nation") are distinguished by a common identity, and almost always by a common origin, in the sense of ancestry, parentage or descent. The national identity refers both to the distinguishing features of the group, and to the individual’s sense of belonging to it. A very wide range of criteria is used, with very different application. Small differences in pronunciation may be enough to categorise someone as a member of another nation. On the other hand, two people may be separated by difference in personalities, belief systems, geographical locations, time and even spoken language, yet regard themselves and be seen by others, as members of the same nation. Nationals are considered to share certain traits and norms of behaviour, certain duties toward other members, and certain responsibilities for the actions of the members of the same nation.

So we see that there is a mention of a "Common Link" among the members of a nation. Now I can understand this quite easily if I am a citizen of a country that is as small as , lets say Iceland.

On the lighter side, My great grandfather was perhaps a viking and viking blood might in fact flow in me as well .

But what if I am the citizen of USA or India for that matter. The whole country is made up of so many different cultures, so many different people and so many different languages that the above definition would surely not encompass such nations. A tamilian is ENTIRELY different in his way of life and looks and language from an Assamese. No way are they related.

So my question is this, "Does it really make sense to call the Tamilian and an Assamese as belonging to the same nation"?

I donot want to hurt any sentiments by asking these questions, but it is just that I am personally not convinced about the fact, that someone somewhere decided "Ok, so let us take this geographical mass , and call it a country"...and Lo , we have India.

If such diversity could still call itself one nation, then why not we include the whole world into one spectrum and be done with a world Nation.

Atleast some Indians could say they are related by the Indus Valley civilisation and that they all have some kind of a common ancestry. But what of the USA. They have Red Indians who are their actual natives. They have Great grandsons and daughters of British settlers, African slaves labourers, Chinese merchants, Indian Software programmers and what not?

Now does it even make sense to call such a diverse mix as having anything in common? They dont even have a common ancestry for that matter.

The greatest comedy about the whole thing is that a huge mass in this world goes about their daily duties without even perhaps realizing that they have a false identity. When someone says "I am a citizen of such and such country", does he realize that that piece of land has until now seen atleast a 1000 different rulers, and a 1000 different languages and cultures since the time Man was born.

Let us take India for example:

If we say common ancestry as the unifying factor, then we ought to have Pakistan United with us...should we not? Why then do many of us have an ill feeling towards them?

In an England Pakistan match, why do we rather feel better if England wins? That is the saddest thing that could ever take place. England has dominated us and has ruled us for centuries just because they were technologically more advanced, and we want England to win a cricket match than Pakistan. (Although a cricket match in no way defines patriotism, but it is all these small things together which perhaps goes to define the big picture).

Another question is, Who has the right to define the borders of a country? Also why should I listen or obey to some rules that were set God knows how long ago and are still being followed.

Ask me , and I would break down all barriers in the world and opt for a world economy. One where we are just a human country.

I do know if what I say may be feasible in a practical sense, but I think it is high time one gave a thought about these things.

Donot just assume that you are a country member just because someone told you so or because you were born in a piece of land whose borders were drawn some 100 years before you even opened your eyes for the first time. Question those who have drawn the border and ask why that is so....

My New Year Resolution II

2006-01-05T22:58:00.000-08:00

My New Year Resolution

2005-12-31T21:59:00.000-08:00

Dont take any resolutions ever.

Thirunalveli - Part I

2005-12-12T00:58:00.000-08:00

Disclaimer : Any resemblance to any characters fictious or otherwise is purely co-incidental.

This movie is in no way related to this

Direction : Floparasu

Hero : Mudhiyor thalapathi 'PichaY' Vazhikkum
....." Thirunalveli Halwa "

Heroine : Basin alias Bema

Opening Scene :

Local Dada Lollipop Candy has just been arrested. He is very angry that the police have arrested him for the 253rd time. The press is waiting outside to take nice pictures of his underwear to display in the next days Page 3.

Police : Dei, nee periya ivana. Peria thimura.

Lollipop Candy : Indha Lollipop Candy melaye kai vechutengala. Enna nadakka poradhu paarunga da.

Police : Ennada da nadakkum.

Lollipop Candy : Adha poruthu irundhu paaru.

Police : Dei, nee enna peria Jeffrey Archer-a suspense ellam kudukkarathukku. Ada chi, Enna da nadakkum ?

Lolliop Candy : Kaal dhaan sir nadakkum.

Police : Ada thu naaye. Idha sollaradhukku dhaan ivvalow peria build up kuduthaye. Chi . Seri seekarama dressellam kazhatti oru pose kudu...press karanga ellam wait pannaranga.

Scene 2:

Lollipop Candy's followers are very upset that he has been arrested and they break all the showrooms and shops in Ranganathan Street.

Rowdy 1 : Dei, Enga annan Lollipop Candy ulla irukaaru , ongalukku ellam ennada vyabaram kekkudha.

Saravana Stores owner : Adey loosu pasangala, engalukku T Nagar, Panagal Park, Adyar ella edathulayum branches irukku da. Nee indha kadaya moodina mattum onnum pudunga mudiaadhu. Venumna indha street cornerlaoru Halwa kada vechirukkan oruthan. Avanukku dhan vyabarame seri illamma oru kadaya vechundu singy adikkaranPoi avanoda kadaya venumna izhuthu moodunga.

Immedialtely all rowdys rush and close that Halwa shop.

Vakkeel sir : Yenppa...edhukaaga enga annan Thirunalveliya kadela vechu pootittenga?

Rowdy 1 : Enga anna Lollipop Candy Jail la irukkaru illa...adhaan engalukku enna pannaradhunnnu theriama ippidi loosu maadhiri edhaavadhu seiyyarom. Nee adhellam kandukkadhe.

Thirunalveli (from within the shop) : Dei rowdy pasangala... ozhugna kadhava tharandhu vittudunga da.

Rowdies : Illatti enna pannuva.

Thirunalveli : Dei, enakku urgenta varudhu da...

Rowdies : Adhu naanga enna bucket-a konduvandhu pidichikava mudium

Thirunalveli : Dei, avasaram theriama pesadhenga da. Naa innikki undrawer kooda podala da. Ippo neenga kadhava tharandha onga ellarukkum oru half kilo halwa freea tharen da....dhayavu senju tharandhu udunga.

Rowdies : Aiyya...onnoda halwakku onnoda ***tharame paravalla. Kadhavellam tharakka mudiadhu.

Suddenly there is a background music. Everyone looks at the shop to see what is happening.Suddenly the door is smashed open from the inside. Ennannu paatha, our hero has thrown his Halwa on the shop door and it broke the door. After that he rushes to the bathroom.

Scene 3 :

Police : Lollipop Candy...edhukku tension aavare. Nee enna ulla varadhu pudhusa?

Lollipop Candy : Naa ulla varadhu pudusu illa. Aana naa ulla irukumbodhu oruthan onnukku ponan illa. Adhaanda pudusu.Evanda onnukku ponadhu. Evanda avan.

Police : Dei loosa nee. Loosa? Nee ulla irukkumbodhu therula pora ella naayum onnukku pochu. Nee adhukellam tensionaaviya? Onna ellam arrest panni mental hospitalla dhaanda sekkanum.

Ranganathan Street. ...Rowdies in the street......

Lollipop Candy : Daaai. Indha Lollipop candy vaaila lollipop vechutaanda. Naa ulla irukkumbodhu evan da onnukku ponadhu?Evan da permission kuduthadhu. Evanda power kuduthadhu? (Catches hold of a guy)

Floparasu : Dei arivu kettavane. Urgenta vandha ellarume povanga da. Adhukku avan ennada pannuvan?

Lollipop Candy : (Catches hold of Floparasu)

Floparasu : Anne, sattaya udunganne yaarunnu sollaren. Sattaya udunganne.

Lollipop Candy : Dei iru da...naa saaptaparama kai kazhuvala...sattaila thodachuttu apparama edukkaren.

(takes his hand after rubbing off the echal)

Floparasu : Avan kosu adikkaradhula palli. Eee adikkaradhula Mortein. Kosuvayum Eeyayum sendhu kalandhu adikkaradhulaavan Nair Kada tea.

Lollipop Candy : Avanukku ivvalow supporta pesara... nee yaaru da?

Floparasu : Dei moodhevi, naa dhaanda onnoda padathoda director. Idhu koodava theriama ivvalow nerama act pannindrukka.

Scene 4:

Lollipop Candy : Daai yaaru da nee?

Thirunalveli : Yaara ennaya ketta?

Lollipop Candy : Paaatha eppdi theriudhu?

Thirunalveli : Paatha kannala dhaan therium. Idhu ennada kelvi?

Lollipop Candy : Dei nakkala pannare. Yaaru daa nee?

Thirunalveli : Thirunalveli.

Lollipop Candy : Idhu enna onnoda appa amma vecha pera?

Thirunalveli : Illa

Lollipop Candy : Pinna? Paakathu veetu aaya vecha pera?

Thirunalveli : Illa

Lollipop Candy : Pinna? Naatamai Sarath Kumar sir vecha pera?

Thirunalveli : Illa

Lollipop Candy :Pinna evan da vechan onakku indha pera?

Thirunalveli : Naanum avana dhaan thedindrukken. Kaila kadacha serupala adikka.
Floparasunnu oruthana nee engiyavadhu paathia? Paatha enakku konjam solli anuppu. Avandhaan indha pera enakku vekka sonnanam.

Lollipop Candy : Ada chi. Andha mutta paya dhaan onakkum peru venchana? Enakkum Lollipop Candynnu avandhan peru vechan. Indha maadhiri ellam peru vecha padam odumaya? Konjamavadhu arivu irukkaya avanukku. Thirunalveli-ngaradhu ooru peru da...ooru peru da..

Thirunalveli : Adhu halwa thayaarikkara edam

Rowdy 1: Appo idhu????

Thirunalveli (throws an halwa and smashes the rowdys head) : Idhu halwa kudukkara edam

Lollipop Candy : Ennoda aal melaye halwa vechu adichaya? Onnoda kudumbathaye naa lollipop aala adikkaren paaru.

Thirunalveli : Dei, yenda anavasiyama tension aavare. Enakku kudumbam ellam kadayadhu. Enakku mattum lollipop kudu...adhu podhum.

----------- to be contd...

P.S 0: I would like to mention Praveen and Kalai for making me switch to Tanglish so that I can be my expressive best.

P.S 1: I do however hope to write a lot of things in English...but from now on there may be a lot of tamil in my posts. So please bear with that :)

Dabba Airways

2005-12-09T01:53:00.000-08:00

Fly in Dabba Airways!!! The all new Free Airline Agency.

YES!!!! It is absolutely free of charge!!!

Flights go from anywhere to anywhere. You only need to pay taxes. We take care of everything else.

Advantages include :
1) Free food for stomach and eyes
2) Entertainment while you fly
3) The One millionth flier will also get an
aeroplane free

Please remember that we are in no way related to this airline.

To book your tickets go to www.dabbaairways.com. If the page says "Sorry, no Web Sites results were found." then your firewall does not permit you from accessing us. You have to come and book in person:

contact:

Mr. Manga madayan Dabba
Care of Thenga madayan Dabba
No. 10 Pichaikaran Street
Andi Nagar
Govindapuram
Chennai - 600420

KARUMAM Masala

2005-12-06T22:22:00.000-08:00

If Lollu Sabha were to imitate the movie Garam Masala, this is what they would call it.

Filmare-la this movie was mentioned as a hit. Seri poi paakalamennu ponen. My friend had booked the ticket which I flatly refused to pay him back once the movie was over. Filmfare-la apparama check pannen just toconfirm if they called it a s-hit or just hit.

Indha padatha poi eppidi da paakrenga? Ada paavigala. Thiruttu VCD la kooda indha padatha paatha idhukku mariyadha kudutha maadhiri.

Luckily we went late to the theatre and missed some 15 minutes of torture.

Story :
Story ellam kettu erkanave vendha punnula vela paachadhenga pa. :(

Screenplay:

We joined the movie at a point when this loosu John Abraham has won a stupid photography award and getsto go to US while Akshay Kumar drinks his way to sadness. Neha Dhupia comes for a "fittings" song. Sadlyshe could not get excercise her lips with either Akshay or John, but she had her quota of exposure for the one song.

Akshay is sad that John gets to go to US, while he singy adichufies here in India. So he catches hold of3 item bomb air hostesses (some more eye candy)

After that it is mostly about Akshay managing the three of them and later John comes and tries to steal themfrom Akshay and some more buckets of shit.

Paresh Rawal provided a glimmer of hope. But in a movie which has ABSOLUTELY no logic, nothing much can be expected.

Positives:

Pasangala, neraya ponnunga dress-e pottukama neraya scene-la varango. Padathukku A Certificate illa. So nalla enjoy pannunga. Idhaan Chance.

Negatives:

Micha ellame negative dhan, adhellam list panna ennoda blog full aidum.

Final Verdict : Dei , masala padam edunga da....adhukaaga ippdi MTR masala oda kevalama edukadhenga.

The Matrix RE-Viewed

2005-12-06T21:32:00.000-08:00

I just read a forward on Matrix Part III and I remembered we once had a discussion in our group regarding the same and this is what I had to say back then about the movie. (I love the Matrix Trilogy, and the following is just for fun :) )

Ok, here goes,

1) How to apply for the post of the ORACLE (Not theDatabase)

To be the ORACLE,all you need to do is talk like this:

Oracle : "You know what you need to know and nothing more"
(CB: Appdiya?? Thalaivaroda adutha padathula yaaru heroine?? I need to know that :()

Oracle : "The choice has been made. All you need to find is why you made the choice"
(CB: Enkitta choice irundha naa onna modhalla seruppala adippen...)

Oracle : "I am here to do I am here to do and you are here todo what you are here to do"
(CB: Amam, naa inga gummanguthu kutharen, nee vandhu pillayar kuthu kuthu)

Oracle : "When you are the ONE you know it. It need not be told"
(CB: Appo edhukku dee nee irukka!!!!)

Oracle : "There will be a time when you have to make a choice.You will either choose one way or choose the other way"
(CB: or choose the highway)

---------------------------

Anyway, I think the old west-Indian Lady Oracle had complained of speaking the same old booooooring dialogues over and over and over and over again that she quit and so these Matrix Makers were in a fix. They had to let out another Matrix(basically Part III) ... so they did not know what to do.

Lastly, they came up with an "Alambindu ai" fund that"Appearances are deceptive" and chose (once again) another pitiable OLD West Indian Lady

I say : If appearances were deceptive:WHY THE HECK DON'T THEY CHOOSE A 10 POINTER VICTORIAS SECRET BABE WITH 38-24-36 STATS ????WHY ... WHY .... of all the people another OLD WEST INDIAN LADY???

I was kinda hoping the next Oracle would be someone like Cindy Crawford :(

----------------------------

2) EASTERN PHILOSOPHIES

At this I am speechless....They have successfully goofed up the entire Eastern Philosophy, not even leaving the names of the characters only to leave me with a vomiting sensation.

"Ramakandra" ---> Ada paavigala, Kadavula kooda vittu vekkalaya :(....

somebody please go and tell the producers that it is "Ramachandra" and not only that, please teach him that"CH" is pronounced as in "Chance" and not as in"Epoch"

The remaining two characters were too called "Kamaaala" and "Saaati"

Komaali nnu sollatha varaikkum sandhosham. Sokka "saaaathine"....

Anyway, the one good thing was that the child was beautiful (good choice). I thought she was of Indian origin even before she let out the funds.

And talk about "Karma" ... the way Neo pronounces it , I thought he was talking about getti chutney and vegetable khurma......

of course, poor guy, he does what the makers tell him to...

A few changes in the naming conventions of our gang memebers after the movie
:-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1) Lakshminarainan Ramakandran
2) Hariprasad Pikai
3) Balasubramanian Kandrasekaran

3) Robot Machines

Velaikke aagadha machines. Sathiya waste

If u make them so dumb u ought to go put ur head in a toilet

Scene 1 : These machines are so many in number, that instead of attacking those who are shooting at them, they just go zoooom, zoooom, flying above their heads and dont do anything but "FLY FLY AND FLY"....

I seriously doubt if they would have done anything if these guys had kept quiet

Scene 2 : As usual a 16 year old good for nothing kid wants to save the day by doing the greatest mistake in the century "Open the gates to let in the incoming ship, but failing to notice that if they let the ship in , that could in turn open the very gate through which these sentinels could potentially pour into Zion in Millions"

And best of all, instead of helping him open the door,these crazy sentinels attack him......I just could not stop laughing (dei loosugala, that boy is opening the door for your friends to come in...so free vidunga...)

.....Anyway, they dropped some smelly funda by saying that the ship contained an "EMP Shockwave" that could knock out the entire army of sentinels"

Oh appdiya, appo : If they had such a technology built into a SHIP, my God, they ought to have that technology right in their backyard where they can use it any time they want....better still, they should take 10 such ships to the Machine City and TURN THE GODDAMM EMP THINGY ON, so that the entire city could be destroyed....

4) Superman Neo :

I will agree to ANY GILPANS (fart) that Neo does inside theMatrix, let it be flying, kicking of 1000 Agents ass, dodging bullets ...anything,

but man...in the real world he is as good as our Vadivelu when it comes to fighting (with his hands of course)....

Apart from knocking down what, say about 10000 sentinels just by thinking it, he goes on to "SEE" theMatrix even though he is blinded... uttaanda dummu

for(i=0;i<100000;i++)
printf( "uvack");

----------------------------

Anyway,there is a lot more, but I better get towork....

Lastly

My 2 Paisa:They could have better stopped with The Matrix Part I and I would have been glad. But no...they had to take the other two parts :(

But still, with all the shortcomings, the Matrix will remain one of my favourite movies :)

Vulgarity in Indian Cinema - contd.

2005-12-05T23:41:00.000-08:00

I named this post as "Indian" cinema and not just "Tamil" cinema because the situation is more or less pertinent to all movies made in India.

Before I go into the details , let me first clarify my position.

Vulgarity - I define this as expressions of energies in excess, and to a tune which is not pertinent to that which is followed among a majority of people in THAT society.

i.e, when we see a french kiss in a movie from France, it is not so uncommon. The same situation here is bound to raise eyebrows. So such a kiss , I will call as vulgar in Indian Cinema whereas not so in French Cinema. The French audience is quite used to those things whereas India is a country where women did not want to touch heros and used to wear skin dresses

There used to be separate cabaret dancers and heroine's like Padmini, Saroja Devi, Madhubala etc. refused to perform cabaret dances.

I do agree that times change, and we too have to accept change.

All the same, the question I raise is...."If it is old, then is it bad?"

IF something has been followed for ages, then it does not necessarily mean it is bad. We have to be mature enough to also adopt to the modern way of living with the essence of the old imbibed in it.

I am truly amazed at how creative the Lyricists of Indian Cinema are when it comes to writing sex songs. Many are nothing but a piece of "Cr**" ( I only am pointing to songs similair to the one below).

How vulgar can you get?

After all, sex is finally sex. So stop it please!! For the love of God and the sanctitiy of sex , stop writing all the various possible things you can do between a man and woman in the form of a song and call it a Lyric. It is just crap. Nothing else. Makes me want to puke.

That was just that audible part of it.

The visuals are worse.

I remember my dad telling me this when I was like 10-11 years old. I used to watch a lot of movies with him , and during a James Bond movie, he told me..."It is better to watch an English movie than an Indian movie, because there will be a sex scene for about 1 minute in a 2 hour English movie, and I can ask you to turn the other side when it is going to come, whereas in an Indian movie, the whole film is filled with vulgarity...how do I stop you from watching it.?"

I can clearly see the change visibly in front of my eyes, that in the last 10 years, Producers seem to spend very less on costumes. Sad thing is Heroine's dont mind that. The Navel is perhaps a part of the heroine which is comfortably forgotten to be covered.

Perhaps, that way, these things will become so common that it may not seem awkward. Who knows?

The difference in vulgarity levels between an English movie and an Indian movie is this:
An English movie portrays the lifestyle of the hero and the herione AS IS EXISTING in their society. The same is not the case in India.

Vulgarity is not just in sex. Take a 500 million rupee wedding ceremony which is performed in almost every goddamm movie. Where in India does such a HUGE wedding take place where everyone wears a Gucci or a Prada outfit?

A single wedding dance cost could run to millions. Is it not a vulgar display of wealth?
The movies are filled with anything but normal. I do agree that exaggeration is a part of a movie, but exaggerating things to this level is just too horrible to bear.

Though this is a bit off topic , in The Matrix, if Neo is able to dodge bullets, there is a solid reasoning behind his ability to do so and hence it makes sense. But Akshay Kumar dodging the bullets when 30 marksmen fire AK-52's at point-blank range at him in a movie makes absolutely no sense. In the end of it all , I only wish that the Producers and Directors stick to how the people behave and not portray some arbit thoughts in the form of a movie.

Did you know that in Malaysia and Singapore, a lot of our Tamil movies are censored heavily. These movies get an A certification in those countries.

Even in a western movie, the heroine is not unnecesarily displaying her body parts unless the situation demands. She wears a Jeans and a T-Shirt which covers more than what is necessary, whereas in most Indian Cinemas, the heroine wears nothing more than a Short (too short for comfort), and a top which displays almost everything, and this is the attire in EVERY scene.

Just take the movies made in the west from 1955 to 2005. You might not observe a visible change. There will still be french kisses. They stay almost same as far as the cultural behaviour of the actors go. The change might be from Bell Bottom pants and long curly hair cuts with colourful outfits, to less glaring outfits and neatly trimmed hair.

Take an Indian movie from 1955-2005. It starts with a fully covered heroine who stays 6 feet away from the hero in 1955, to a skin dress wearing heroine who might touch the hero in 1965 , to a heroine who occasionally shows different "earlier" covered parts of her body in 1985, to "Rangeela" in 1995 and finally on-screen sex scenes in Salam Namasthe and Bunty Aur Babli in 2005. I wonder how these movies escape an A certification?

This metamorphosis is not possible unless we have an incessant urge to imitate the west.

Sex sells, they tell.

But Sholay ran for 5 years. IF released now, it may run for another 5 years. Where was sex in Sholay?

Tell me the name of a single movie that grossed the earnings of Sholay which had sex as the topic?

Murder/Zeher/Fire???

They did not even run the first 10 days of release.

Directors, please realize that sex alone is not enough. Please donot look to vulgarity to make your movie run. A heroine looks like a Goddess when she wears the wonderful Indian Costume - The Saree and has Jasmine flowers in her head , and a Bhindhi in her forehead with some jewels tasetefully worn . She looks like a whore in a bath dress.

Choose a Goddess for a heroine and not a whore. I donot say that exposure of any kind is bad. All I say is stick to what is culturally feasible in the society where we live in and not show things which donot happen anywhere in the country.

I can show hundreds of Indian movies recently released which donot have excessive vulgarity in them, all the same I can show lakhs of movies which do :(. I hope the situation reverses.

Vulgarity in Indian Cinema

2005-12-05T02:14:00.000-08:00

I had wanted to blog about this for a long time...I will also write other articles, but let me start off with a song from a Tamil Cinema. I donot wish to translate it because I feel highly embarassed to even put up that lyrics here in Tamil. Instead of putting forth my opinions on this first, I thought I will show one example first, and then continue.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Egipthu Raani onakku edhukku dhaavani from Narasimha

Egipthu raani, onakku edhukku dhaavani
Enakku nee dhaan irukka edhukku thalagaani
Karuppu singam siricha neruppu pathikum
Irumbu nenjam thorandha kurumbu thothikkum

Hey ganja poondhottam
onna roja poovaasam
adi vaasam paathu mosam ponene
On meesayil ulla mudiadhu ellam yaana mudi
Adhil modharam senju podanum kai mela

.....

En veera, Un pera pacha kuthipen
Engennu nee sonna anga kaamippen
En bhoomi Un vaayil thenaa thithipen
Ennoda mundasa onna suthipen
Rendu dharava dhaaan samanja ponnu naan
Kannaaaal thechaye

Panju mullaye sela katti nee moodi vechaye...
Oru aan yaana dhaan on kayile ullasama oonjal aadum

Egipthu raani, onakku edhukku dhaavani
Enakku nee dhaan irukka edhukku thalagaani

.....

Pooven un mundhanai chinna koodaram
thenoorum un thoppul kutti paadhalam
muththathal seivoma niththam malyudhdham
appoppo vaayoram singa pal kuthum

Roma illadha dheham rendu dhaan meenum neeyum dhaan
Enga engayo enna thottadhu neeyum kaathumdhan
Adi Un naakile En perayum naa ezhudhava muththathaala

Egipthu raani, onakku edhukku dhaavani
Enakku nee dhaan irukka edhukku thalagaani
.....

If I were to sing this song, I would certainly be embarassed. I might perhaps refuse to do so.

C India

2005-11-27T23:04:00.000-08:00

#include
main()
{
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int count = 1;
for (b=c=10;a="- FIGURE?, UMKC,XYZHello Folks, TFy!QJu ROo TNn(ROo)SLq SLq ULo+ UHs UJq TNn*RPn/QPbEWS_JSWQAIJO^ NBELPeHBFHT}TnALVlBLOFAkHFOuFETp HCStHAUFAgcEAelclcn^r^r\\tZvYxXy T|S~Pn SPm SOn TNn ULo0ULo#ULo-W Hq!WFs XDt!" [b+++21]; )

for(; a-- > 64 ; )
putchar ( ++c=='Z' ? c = c/ 9:33^b&1);
}

Hmm...my logo?

2005-11-23T02:44:00.000-08:00

God Does Exist

2005-11-22T08:51:00.000-08:00

I read this in a friends blog and thought it ought to be in mine too....(Thanks Ramasubbu for letting me know this story)...

This is one of the best explanations of why God allows pain andsuffering that I have seen. It's an explanation other people willunderstand.

A man went to a barbershop to have his hair cut and his beard trimmed. Barber began to work, they began to have a good conversation. They talked about so many things and various subjects.

When they eventually touched on the subject of God, the barber said: "I don't believe thatGod exists."

Why do you say that?" asked the customer

"Well, you just have to go out in the street to realize that God doesn't exist. Tell me, if God exists, would there be so many sickpeople? Would there be abandoned children? If God existed, there would beneither suffering nor pain. I can't imagine a loving God who would allow all ofthese things."

The customer thought for a moment, but didn't respond because he didn't want to start an argument. The barber finished his job and the customer left the shop.

Just after he left the barbers shop, he saw a man in the street with long, stringy, dirty hair & an un trimmed beard. He looked dirty and unkempt.The customer turned back and entered the barbershop again and he said to the barber:

"You know what? Barbers do not exist."

"How can you say that?" asked the surprised barber.

"I am here, and I am a barber. And I just worked on you!"

"No!" the customer exclaimed.

"Barbers don't exist because if they did, there would be no people with dirty long hair and untrimmed beards like that man outside."

"Ah, but barbers DO exist! What happens is, people do not come to me."

"Exactly!" affirmed the customer. "That's the point!God, too, DOES exist! What happens, is, people don't go to Him and do not look for Him. That's why there's so much pain and suffering in theWorld."

So much for the power of the Pen

2005-11-22T04:40:00.000-08:00

A consolation from the exam on Sunday was that I managed to come in the papers.

http://www.hindu.com/2005/11/21/stories/2005112114430300.htm

I said "This year the paper had a lot less questions compared to last year and also the difficulty level was greater, and therefore the cut offs would be lower."

She understood it as "This year's paper was slightly easier than last year's test," said C. Balasubramaniam, who took CAT for the second time. With over two years' work experience, Balasubramaniam said he hoped to get into a good business school.

Hehe....that too she has mishhpelt my name as Balasubramaniam ....I clearly told her it was C.Balasubramanian.

:(

Now I know what Kushboo feels like.

Smelly CAT

2005-11-22T02:06:00.000-08:00

About a lakh and a half students took the Common Admissions Test to make an attempt at entering the "Premiere Management Institutes" in India.

My take on the exam is positive as well as negative.

Positives of the exam:

1) A test of nerves.

2) Checks various areas.

Negatives of the exam:

1) The area of an equilateral triangle is not going to help a manager to get the work done from his subordinates.

2) The element of "luck". If among every 1000 students , 1 student just marks , say 5-6 questions at a random order, without even knowing the answers... in the event that he gets them right, he might as well clear the cut offs that one needs (especially when they are predicted to be as low as 7-8 marks in a section). This is the comedy of "Probability". It may seem that 0.1% is a very small number....but when put that out of every 1000 , 1 person might get it right...it seems plausible. The selection ratio of an institute is nearly 200/1,50,000 which is a ridiculously small number in front of 0.1%.

3) Element of ambiguity : I have seen nearly 4 answer keys of different coaching institutes, and those answers vary hugely especially in the Verbal section.
If the brains in these coaching institutes cannot agree on a particular answer to a question, even after half a day of deliberation... then God bless the students who sit at the exam hall and try to find the answer.

And the greatest tragedy of this exam is that, a lot of able students , who could potentially lead well, have been rejected because on "That" day, they happened to fall into the wrong set of answers among the ambiguous ones.

A loss of just 1 mark is precious in an exam of this magnitude. 1 mark down and you could potentially be 1000 ranks down, and your chance of clearing a cut off may be a story of the past.

When such is the case, this 1 mark might very well belong to that ambiguous category.

So now, what else do I suggest as an alternative? Do I Say the exam is bad? Do I say that it is a stupid way to select students?

My answers:

1) IIT has a screening which removes a lot of students and then conducts another exam. This could be simulated.

Secondly, the test seems to be the single most vital factor which determines a students selection. In a lot of the cases, a student gets either 4-5 calls or no call at all depending upon if he is on this side or that side of the wall. When this be the case, almost all students who manage a call inevitably make it through atleast one of the institutes.

Thirdly, call a lot more people for the interviews and decide based on a bigger sample set. This may have an overhead of extra days spent on deciding the students. But, believe me, the extra days are worth it, as these students may shape the country in the coming decades.

Lastly, allow room for people to take the exam at their time of choosing (something similair to GRE/GMAT). Also, increase the number of attempts one can give in a year, say to 2-3 and he can select his best performance for perusal.

2) I donot say that the exam is bad. What I do say is that when there is so much demand both from students as well as the industry , why not increase the number of seats and cater to both ends?

3) I donot say it is a stupid way to select students. I say it is a stupid way to reject students :).

The points expressed here are purely my view. I donot want to hurt anybodys sentiments. As are millions of POV's this is one such :).

Wow

2005-11-14T21:44:00.000-08:00

Read this somewhere and it gave me a great new insight :

"A few months ago I was talking to another MBA student, a very talented man, about 30 years old from a great school with a great resume. I asked him what he wanted to do for his career, and he replied that he wanted to go into a particular field, but thought he should work for McKinsey for a few years first to add to his resume. To me that's like saving sex for your old age. It makes no sense."
- Warren Buffett

Are you paid enough?

2005-11-11T01:59:00.000-08:00

Well, I took this IQ test in this link:

And according to it, this is my result.

Looks like I should be getting around 56 LPA Indian Rupees for my IQ and I am getting....ahem....better left unsaid :)

It says :

You got 22 questions right out of a possible 25. This gives you a cash/cleverness coefficient of...

17

Wow. Your IQ is as far above the average for your salary level as the scale permits. What are you doing with your life?

No Comments from my side.

Mega Serial Paapengala?

2005-11-10T22:53:00.000-08:00

Ever been a victim of Mega Serials? Your mom watches 'Selvi'? Your dad watches 'Kolangal'? Your grandma just cannot stop discussing 'Chitti'? Your grandpa has put on his speaker phones and can't hear what you are trying to tell him?

And does this happen from 7.30 in the evening to 10 PM in the night, and includes 11.30 in the morning to 2PM in the afternoon

Does your mom spend half an hour over the phone discussing all the episodes she missed with your aunt when all it takes for you to gather what has happened thus far in the story is to just watch the next episode.

Welcome to the club.

If you want to be a mega-serial director all you have to do is to follow the Algorithm:

1) Take a Central Character. (Preferably a female who is between 25-40 years of age).

2) The Central Character of your story faces all kinds of hardships, which belong to the following group:

a) A wicked mother in law who wants nothing but money.
b) A dad who has a secret affair and has had more kids than you know of
(And thereby you have more brothers and sisters than you realise)
c) The central character should face difficulty in Business. All kinds!

3) Atleast 3-4 male characters must cheat on their wives of which even though the wives know of this affair they donot tell it out (because then a Mega - Serial ends, and becomes a Mini Serial)

4) Follow the following nature table :

Read : Character is a ; Age Group ; Behaves like:

a) Female ; 0-16 ; A lovable child who is the apple of the eye of the central character.

16-25 Sister/Half sister/Cousin of central character who loves a boy from some other caste/religion/economic status. Preferably from the enemy family.

25-45 Preferable for the Central Character. Also for Villains. Villains in this category are preferably relatives or half-sister/brother or are brothers/sisters of the central characters spouse who want all the "Soththu" (wealth) or are ex-wives or ex-lovers of central character.
Or last but not least, villains who have been affected by some imaginary deed which central characters dad/mom had done some million years ago.

45-65 Hopeless category for females. Invariably all the females except if you happen to
be the central character (believe me you dont want to choose your central character in this age
group), are jack asses. They are either cruel mother in laws or whining mothers or ex'es
of the central characters dad.

65 + Included in the story just so that they may die when an opportune moment occurs.
Most suited to give good advice to everybody in the story.

b) Male 0-16 A guy who sees a lot of violence in the family and either turns into a villain
or the hero later on

16-25 Brother/Half brother/Cousin of central character who loves a girl from some other
caste/religion/economic status. Preferably from the enemy family.

25-45 Invariably cheats on his wife (if he is not the central character) Has a lot of skeletons in his closet which are not dug out until the very last episode (which is not soon) Preferable for the central character. Sometimes useful as the central "female" characters "good friend" who stands by her during all odds, only to be suspected by the central characters jerk of a husband.

45-65 Hopeless category for men as well. You are either a father in law who cannot control his
wife any longer or are a "dhanda soru" in the family. Jalras are also useful in this category.
Nosy people often fall in this category.

65+ Well, you too are included so you may die when needed the most. Mostly a diabetes patient or rheumatic. Loves the grandchildren and purchases an eclairs chocolate for them with whatever little money he has.

5) Once you decide on the nature table you have to do this:

a) Perform 4-5 marriages. That way, you can get atleast 40-50 episodes in easily (2-3 episodes for preparing for the nichyadhartham, 2-3 for purchases for marriage, 2-3 for marriage itself and 2-3 for post marriage fights/bonding/mother in law sentiments etc).

b) Villain Scores: Throw in a dozen episodes for the villain to win over the central
character in business (such as a court case....believe me court case is the best thing you can bring into your story....not only are you guaranteed of 20 odd episodes, but also it grabs the attention of the audience like no other, and believe me, audience knows nothing about the
judiciary...so you can crap all you want here and noone will notice).

c) 3-4 deaths (all 65+ characters were included in the first place for this)

i) This gives you a preparation for death episode - hospital scenes,
wealth fight scenes,sentiment scenes etc....thereby 3-4 episodes per
death

ii) Post Death wealth fights can run for 3-4 episodes or more
depending on if they turn into court cases

d) A Plot. Ok....Its not that difficult as it seems. The plot is nothing but letting people know who cheated their wives, who did not and who planted a bomb in the factory of the central character etc. It does not have to be anything ingenious...it just should not be ingenuous.

e) Sentiments. This is very important. In fact, the more you pour into this area, the more you win. Father-in-law to daughter-in-law sentiments. Thaali sentiments. Brother Sister entiments. Husband and wife sentiments. These are most vital. Make sure this is there in all the families that are portrayed.

f) Slow motion and background music : Utterly essential. Your script writer has not written the next episode and you dont know what to telecast? Make one episode into two by making it run in slow motion. Noone will notice as long as the slow motion has background music attached to it.

Very very useful when Central Character delivers Punch Dialogues and walks away

g) The central character suffers throughout the story. This is central. This
is utterly essential. If the central character is happy then it means the serial is over. This is like cricket. Though India keeps losing in cricket people watch it play in the hope that it will win some day. Finally when it wins, it gathers so much support as it never has before.

6) Catch an ex heroine (one who has been in movies in the past) to act as your central character. Somehow familiarity seems to breed viewership.

"Oh yeah, there is that heroine I used to like when I was an adolescent...good thing now I get to see her again. So what if she is old...I am old too"

7) Lastly, the secret formula for a mega serial. Make it last 250 episodes atleast. The longer it runs the better.But 250 episodes is a bare minimum. IF that is not the case, then you ought to be ashamed of your serial.

P.S : A tip to take the cheapest mega serial. Put cameras in the houses of 10-15 families, and telecast the same. But make sure you add in the masala somewhere as sentiments and other stuff rarely happen in real life.

High-Fives!

2005-11-10T20:32:00.000-08:00

Thanks Adi for tagging me.

Here goes my five:

Five movies which I like the most

1) Tha Matrix Trilogy (English)

2) Braveheart (English)

3) Michael Madhana Kama Rajan (Tamil)

4) Basha (Tamil)

5) Black (Hindi)

Five things I can never live without

1) My heart

2) My lungs

3) My kidney

4) My brain

5) My stomach

Five most favourite celebrities (This list changes :) )

1) Sachin Tendulkar (Cricketer)

2) A R Rahman (Musician)

3) Vivek (Tamil Comedian)

4) Swami Vivekananda (Spiritualist)

5) J K rowling :) ( I know it seems childish....but I just love Harry Potter :) )

Five things I miss now

1) Parents and brother(Living in Chennai)

2) My friends gang (all who are not here with me)

3) My keychain (I left it at home during the recent visit)

4) My childhood

5) My college years

Five things I plan to do in near future

1) Go home and sleep

2) Wake up and eat

3) Watch TV

4) Play Computer Game

5) Come to office and work

Last movie I borrowed to watch & still not given back

1) hehehe...I wont give the answer to this one ! Otherwise my friend who reads this will ask me to give it back

Five books I love

1) Ramayana

2) Mahabharata

3) Harry Potters :)

4) The Greatest Miracle In the World

5) The Dancing Wu Li Masters

Five people I pass this HIGH FIVES to

1) Ksri

2) RL

3) Poorna

4) Kumari

5) Pam

Tamil cinema (Il)L(ai)ogic

2005-11-10T00:22:00.000-08:00

1) Thaali sentiment : The "thaali" (mangal sutra), is THE most sacred thing to a woman. He who tries to take it away from her shall feel for it. He who ties it shall relax once the job is done.

Do you want to make a good tamil figure your wife? Just put a yellow thread around her neck and she is all yours.

2) Punch dialogue : "Naa anga vandhaa, nee enga pove?" - Sucks doesn't it? I know. I made this one up.

But so does "Sullaaaann sooooodanen,sulukku eduthuduven" or "Iyya paaka dhaan local, aana all over Tamil nadu kalakkal"

3) The Matrix - Part 824

Screw Gravity. Screw physics. Heros in Tamil Cinema don't know they exist.

The Hero does a bicycle kick on the villain and does a triple flip to kick the two guys who come to him from behind and make a perfect landing. This is perfectly valid and don't you dare question it if the hero kicks a guy who travels 10 metres and breaks a brick wall.

4) Dumb ass villains : 'N' lorries full of villains surround our hero. They have the ultimate "Thirupaachi Aruvaals","Cricket Bats", "Cycle Chains" and what not. But I am surprised as to why they dont all attack at once , and watch as one by one everyone gets his butt kicked.

If I were the villain, I would suggest all of them go and jump on top of the hero all at once and see what he does.

Hmm, but Sankar did try that in Anniyan, when about 50-100 Karate Black belts jumped on top of our hero only to be thrown away like the way bowling pins are knocked all over. So I guess, there really is no way you can kick the hero's ass.

Ever heard of a weapon called the "Gun" ? When will they ever use it?

Oh ya! they did try it against our very own Captain vijayakanth in Narasimha. But did not work. Sadly Tamil Cinema heros are faster than bullets, so they cant be hit by them.

5) Sentiment :

"Maattu ponnunna maadu maadhiri pottu adipengalada?"

Wondering who delivered this one? Not me. Our very own T.Rajendhars dialogue in one of the movies.

I say "Maatu ponnunna maadu maadhiri thirumbi odhaikka vendiyadhu dhaane"

That should solve the issue.

6) Dance among the heavens: The hero comes from a local galeej area. The heroine has never set foot outside the agraharam. The two see each other. They fall in love. And out of nowhere 10 stupid ass guys come behind the hero and start dancing. Another 10 dumb ass females who forgot to wear a saree, come and dance behind our heroine
and we find ourselves visiting Switzerland, Austalia and what not?

I wish I find these guys in the streets, but they just dont want to dance with me when I try to start a dance :(

7) Story - Rich Heroine. Poor Hero. Heroines dad/mama = Villain. Heroine is a spoilt brat. Hero is an unblemished ass kicker. Hero teaches heroine that heroine sucks. So heroine loves hero. Gives up her ego. Gives up her wardrobe(which
rarely had any dress that could cover more than 2 feet of body btw). Villain interferes and gets his ass kicked. They all live happily ever after. In between the above 1-6 points take place wherever applicable.

8) Police - Pick up the remains. Once you see the Police, you know that the Climax is over.

9) Villain's dialogues - Why does the villain not just shoot the goddamm hero straightaway and have to give a lecture explaining how and why he did all the things which nobody knew till then.

To top it, he would make the hero stand on a melting ice-cube with a noose around his neck, so that another hero has enough time to come and rescue him, eventually kicking villains ass.

My God, can Villains be any dumber.

My advice to all you Tamil Cinema Villains : You capture the hero? Shoot him. Just f***ing shoot him. Don't talk.

10) Love - Love to Indian Cinema is Kung-Fu to Chinese Cinema. You just can't afford not to have-em.

Black Pulsar 150 DTSi

2005-11-09T22:02:00.000-08:00

Hmm....Good noos, I bought a noo bike. This is the first time I am stepping out of the "No gear, no clutch, no good, Kinetic Honda" types vehicle to a proper geared vehicle.

The ride back home on the new bike from the shop was not without inviting 112 curses, 349 swear words and 423 "Get out of the way you A*****" :)

But I have successfully managed to bring it home without a scratch (though it is the first time I am riding a Pulsar, and in fact, though I have a licence to drive geared vehicles, I am just learning to drive an "Actual Geared Vehicle")

Hope to drive safely !! Wish me luck :)

Ravana - a hero?

2005-10-28T00:12:00.000-07:00

Well. I had mentioned in one of my fellow bloggers blog, that I would be writing this one on Ravana.

Let me just say that Rama could not hope for a better opponent to test his mettle than Ravana.

During the Ramayana Period there were three greatest warrior heros. They were, Rama,
Vaali and Ravana. I will write a separate article on Vaali, but for now I rest with Ravana.

Ravana, the "Villain" in the Ramayana epic, was not as is much misunderstood a demon who was just the typical monster in all epics. Ravana was much much more. He was born of brahmin father and a rakshasa (sanskrit for demon) mother. In him were imbibed the knowledge and greatness of a brahmin coupled with the strength and valour of a rakshasa.

Ravana was one of the greatest brahmins of his day. In fact, there is an anecdote which goes like this:

"Once Narada (a saint and a devotee of Sri Narayana, one of the trinities), went to Parvati (consort of Lord Shiva, one of the trinities) and told her that Lakshmi (Sri Narayana's consort), lives in a beautiful palace while you live in a graveyard and that too in the cold Himalayan mountains.

Listening to this Parvati went to Lord Shiva and told him that she wanted to live in the best palace that the world has ever seen. To satisfy his wifes wishes Lord Shiva had Viswakarma build one of the greatest wonders in the world for a palace. It was a Golden Palace which was so splendid in all aspects that Viswakarma had to say "This is by far my best creation".

It is a custom that the first time someone moves into a house we perform a "Griha Pravesha" homam (house entering ceremony). For this she wanted the "Greatest Brahmin" on earth to perform this ceremony for her.

She called upon Ravana to do it.

Ravana performed the ceremony so well, that Parvati was uttrerly pleased and told Ravana to ask for a boon in return for his service. She said "Ask anything and it shall be yours"

Ravana said "I want this palace" :)

Parvati was totally dumbstruck and angry. Since she was bound by the boon she gave up the palace to him. But also cursed him and said that "This palace and all those who live in this land shall always remain in conflict"

And to this day Lanka remains a place which sees conflicts everyday."

Story apart, Ravana was considered the greatest brahmin of his day. It is said that Ravana had all the "Nava Grahas" on the steps on the way to his throne and that since he saw Shani bhagavan everyday, he was accursed with bad luck and hence lost out in the War.

It is said that, so great was Ravanas "Thava Valimai" (aura/energy/power....not finding the exact word for this one :) ), that Lord Brahma (the last of the trinity), used to visit him every morning and pay obeisance to him.

On Ravana's ability as a Veena player, it is said that he could melt a mountain with his Veena skills.

A romantic. Perhaps the greatest. Rajagoplachari has a lot to say about Ravana's romantic aspect. Ravana used to get the woman of his desire and he could go to any length to do so. There are many Gandharva Purushas who had cursed him for his stealing their wives (Narantaka cursed Ravana that his head would burst into three parts the next time he touched a woman without her consent).

But so powerful was Ravana that these curses took no effect on him. Until one day, finally seeing his atrocity, Lord Brahma himself cursed him that his head would be blown a thousand pieces if he touched a woman without her consent.

Ravana could not risk Lord Brahma's curse, but at the same time, he never stopped doing what he did. Just that, he behaved in such a romantic way, that he convinced any woman to consent to whatever he wished for her to do.

This was the reason why Ravana could not force Sita devi to marry him. Unless she consented, he could not molest her for fear of Lord Brahma's curse.

Mandodari, his wife, was considered the most beautiful woman on earth during that time. She was also a very wise counsellor and used to advise Ravana that he should not have kidnapped Sita devi. However, the lust that Ravana had for Sita, was the only thing which differentiated him from Lord Rama.

In all, Ravana was not just a Rakshasa King. He was THE RAKSHASA KING. He was their leader in all aspects. Be it arts, war, romance, influence....you name it and he had it.

To top it all he was one of the Greatest Shiva Bhaktha of his period. With his son Indrajit and his warrior brother Kumbhakarna, it would take nothing less than the forces of Lord Rama, Lakshmana and Hanuman to finish him.

It is also said in one of the puranas, that Ravana did contend to become the husband of Sita. He was the only one other than Lord Rama to have Lifted the famous "Shiv Dhanush". But unfortunately he could not string it, for that was not what Lord Shiva wanted to happen.

Truly a warrior one does not want to oppose unless one is Lord Rama.

368

2005-10-27T22:44:00.000-07:00

- the number of times so far that I have been asked "Have you still not been to US??"

huh? So?

A dirty tale - Part Two

2005-10-27T00:55:00.000-07:00

Read Part One below first.

"First I want the toilets done. Next the cup boards. Then I want the floormat cleaned. Then do the gardens. I have some old rugs stored in the attic. I want them dusted as well. If you do a good job I might consider giving you another Coola." said, Mr. Stingix.

It is a Sunday. And I am working.

"What is this shoddy job that you have done you nincompoop.", shouted Mr.Stingix as I was cleaning the cup boards He was referring to the toilets.

"Sir, I did my best. But it is very difficult to make to sparkling clean. I hope you understand"

"This is horrible. Horrible I say. Do we people pay you so that you do a job such as this. ", he hollered.

"I am sorry sir. I will try to do better".

After two hours.

"Oh my God. You really are a nincompoop are you not. Look at this. ", he said pointing to a stain in one of the
sheets.

"Sir, that stain was not coming off no matter how hard I tried. I guess it is permanent"

"Permanent my ass. You need to work harder to remove boy. You are not even half as much worth as I paid you for"

Another two hours pass.

"Look at this. Look at this. The floormat is not aligned properly"

"Sir, I am not yet done with it. I would soon make it alright"

And so it went. At the end of the day,

"I dont know why I paid 5 coolas to get such a shoddy job done boy. Why, I might as well have done it myself"

And that did it.

I could stand it no more.

"Well sir, then why dont you do it yourself. Let me see if you can do any better", I quipped.

For a second I could see no expression on his face. He looked at me as if a bomb just exploded in his ass. He could
not comprehend what was going on.

A cleaner had just replied back to a "Company" member to go take a hike.

It took a full minute before he shouted at the top of his voice "THIS IS OUTRAGEOUS. I SHALL HAVE YOU REMOVED FROM
YOUR JOB RIGHT AWAY."

Although what I just did, would have utterly destroyed what my father held as his principle, this is my life
and I decide to make the rules. He lived by what he thought was best for him. Sadly, I am not such a noble soul
to be so dutifully bound as to stand in front of this jack-ass who knows nothing about cleaning, lecturing me
how to clean his toilets.

"There wont be any need for it. I quit myself", I said, and walked out.

That evening there was a meeting at the Committee, and they put up a job-opening for the Cleaners post.

A week passed.

Two weeks.

There was no member in Googooland who was willing to fill that post.

A month passed.

Googooland started to stink like Goo. With no cleaner, the residents had to do the job themselves.

"Oh My God!!! Cleaning seems to take away my entire time. When the hell will I go and do my work in the office?",
shouted Mr. Nefarix, when his wife wanted him to help her do all the dishes.

2 months.

"Thats it! I can't do this anymore. My back is still aching from last weeks cleaning of the attic", said Mr. Stingix,
when his wife asked him to take care of the clothes.

3 months.

"Why the hell is the committee not recruiting anyone", shouted Mr. Irritablix.

By now, panic ensued, and all the members could stand it no longer. They all held an emergency meet and decided to call
me back.

"Son, We are sorry to have hurt you before. We promise we would not treat you as we did before. Please take back your job"
they all told.

"1200 Goolas a week. Sunday holiday.", was my reply

They all went blank for a moment.

"Son, what you are demanding is too high. What would your father think of you? Did he not teach you that work is worship"

"Yes he did. He taught me that work is worship. And I want you all to pay divine money for my work."

"Son, even those who work for the "Company" earn much less than that"

"I know. That is because they dont work as hard as I do. I deserve more. Take this offer or leave it"

"You can't be so hard on us son. You know that what you demand is too much"

"Is it? Well. If that be the case I am not forcing you all. You can leave anytime you wish."

They left.

A year passed.

Now I have my own TV. My own car. My own cellphone. I have a job that gives me 1200 Goolas a week plus a lot of respect.

I wish my father were there with me now.

A Dirty Tale - Part One

2005-10-27T00:47:00.000-07:00

"Clean up that piece of shit you idiot. Who do you think would do that? Your dad?", came the voice from
Mr.Nefarix

"Sure sir. Right away", I said in a sober tone.

Being the only cleaner in Googooland was not an easy job. Dumping shit seemed to be the only things these people ever do in this place.

Well, I am Janitix. 23 years old. Tall, Brown and stocky. I work under the Committe for Cleanliness for Googooland.

"Work is worship Son. All professions are equal. Donot think of any other profession as better or worse than what we do", my father Cleenix, used to say.

Now he is no more. Only his thoughts remain with me. My father is my inspiration. A very disciplined man who liked things clean. He could never stand to see even a speck of dirt in Googooland. He worked hard day and night and was solely responsible for Googooland's beauty.

A highly respected person he was.

Or was he...?

"A chip of the old block aren't you my boy", exclaimed Mr.Admirablix,seeing me cleaning the place up. Mr. Admirablix was one of the few men whom I liked to look upon as a father figure after my fathers departure.

"Oh you praise me a lot sir. I am just doing my duty", I said.

"Hmm, I have a few dirty cupboards which I would like you to help me clean. I will pay you 2 Goolas for it. When can you help me out?", said Mr. Admirablix.

"2 Goolas for cup boards? Sir, that is very generous of you. That is almost the amount I earn for a whole week of cleaning the place"

"I think you deserve it son. Sunday good for you then?"

"Sure sir. Anytime, you want, I would be there"

2 Goolas for cup-boards? I only wish the others were like him...

"Hey you, what the heck are you doing there wasting your time. Come over here you lazy bum", shouted Mr.Stingix

"Coming over sir. Yes. Please tell me what you want cleaned".

"I want you to come over this Sunday and help me clean my house. I have already booked you for this weekend at the Committee and I just wanted to inform you as well"

"But sir, I thought Sunday was a holiday", I said in a note of despair.

I was looking forward to going to Mr. Admirablix house during the weekend.

"WHAAAT!!!", exclaimed Mr.Stingix as if a bee just stung him.

"You good-for-nothing son-of-a-cleaner. Money has gone into your head hasnt it boy.
I payed an arm and leg at the committee to get you to work on Sunday. Be happy my boy,You get 5 Coolas.I think that ought to put things in a better perspective. Better be there."

I would recieve 40 times as much as this guy is offering me if only I went to Mr. Admirablix's house.

But I had no choice.

Or did I?

Well, I dont seem know the answer to this question. My father always used to ask me to go by the committees word and treat it as the word of God. I do respect him for all his wisdom. But what if he was wrong?

"Get out of here you good-for-nothing cleaner", was what Mr.Irritablix said, everytime my dad asked a holiday

"I dont loan money to people who cant repay", was what Mr.Greedix said, when my dad wanted some money

"Have I met you?", was what Mr. Oblivix asked my father , after all these years that my father has been cleaning
his house.

It is as if my father never even existed in this strange land of people. Only I seemed to carry his memory around.

"Son, a person who works in the "Company", is no better or no less than you. It is all the same my son. God intends each man to do his duty for the smooth functioning of a society. Let us do our role well and be proud of it."

I used to listen with awe as my father spoke these words. I watched with an open mouth,the amazing ease with which he was able to digest all the neglect and scorn he receieved from these ungrateful members.

All the members of Googooland who worked in the "Company" used to get a 1000 Goolas every week, while I seemed to get just 1 Goola a week.

I had no say in my salary. None.

My dad is gone and there is no one to give me the advice which can pull me through this misery. When he was around I could stand everything, as he stood as a towering giant of hope. But now,things are not the same.

I stand here in front of Mr.Stingix, a man who has absolutely no sense of respect for the work I do.

I wonder what I should say to him.

"Yes, sir. I would be there on Sunday"

- I once saw a software guy insulting a cleaner in office premises and treat him like Janitix is being treated in this story. I was inspired to write this as a reply to all those who have a "Holier than thou" attitude in life.

My experiments with cartoons

2005-10-25T00:39:00.000-07:00

My experiments with cartoons

2005-10-25T00:12:00.000-07:00

Now thats what I was looking for :)

2005-10-24T20:31:00.000-07:00

http://economictimes.indiatimes.com/articleshow/1219512.cms

He he he

2005-10-20T22:32:00.000-07:00

Read this somewhere (read along the lines of Ghajini):

Ganguly: En paer Saurav, muzhu paer Saurav Ganguly.

Saurav’s Doctor: Ivarala 15 nimisathaku maela entha pitchlayum batting panna mudiyathu. Yaro ivar thalaila vegama ball pottu thakiyirukaanga.
Ivar oru SHORT TERM BATTING LOSS patient.

Check the Tamil version : http://msams.blogspot.com/

Moving with In-Laws

2005-10-17T23:13:00.000-07:00

Hmm...this is the cliched argument I hated in the Priyasaki movie.

If one expects a girl to move out of her house and stay with the guy and his parents, the same applies to the guy as well. Although in India this custom has become deeply ingrained in us, I am yet to fully understand why this custom came into picture in the first place. I am not for the couple moving out and staying away from either families. Rather, what I suggest is that all of them sort out an arrangement where they all stay close.

Ask me, and I would say, that I would love a daughter as much as a son, and parting with either of them would be difficult for me.

In the US, it may be a very easy thing for people to get along without being with their children, but that is not so in India. I can see why it is so in our case. You have Social Security in the US, and even if you grow old, the government is there to take care of you. This is not the case in India, where the children are the social security of the parents. So what happens to a parent who just has girl children? Is he doomed to live all alone with his/her spouse and what happens when that spouse dies as well?

All I say is that in India we have a good family culture, where people stay close to each other. We donot find it uncommon to see that children are with their parents even when they are 50 years old.

I remember once a foreign interviewer asked Aishwarya Rai cheekily, "I heard that you still stay with your parents". To that, she replied , much to my satisfaction and appreciation, "Yes, I certainly do. That way, I donot have to ask my parents appoinment for taking dinner with them". At this, all the interviewer could manage after swallowing his saliva, was "Well, there is something that we have learnt" :)

So what is it that I say finally?

Well, stay with both your parents (your and your spouses) and support them in their old age. In general there is a tendency for the girls' parents to refuse staying with their son-in-law and I request that we break that mental make up :). They are after all your parents in a sense.

If you donot take care of your parents, then you would be in their shoes one day, and perhaps it would be too late when you have realised your folly. For they may not be there to take care of.

Love is not business

2005-10-17T22:50:00.000-07:00

Atleast that is what I think it is. If business is defined as "give and take", I would define love as "give and give".

This is regading the first part of the Priyasaki blog which I said I liked.

I am reminded of a story. There are various versions of it (greek, chinese etc.). I am sticking to the Indian version of it.

A student once approached Sri Adi Sankara and asked for his definition of true love. To this the Acharya took him to a pond and asked him to take some water in his hand with his palm outstretched. The student did so and the water sparkled in the sunlight and was a beautiful sight to behold. Now the Acharya asked him , "How does the water look like". The student replied "It looks very beautiful and is lovely to behold". Now the Acharya asked him to close his fists, and on doing so the water slipped through his hand and fell into the pond once again. The Acharya said "Love is like the water that you just had. As long as you donot try to possess it it would seem beautiful. The moment you try to own it, it slips through your hand and leaves nothing behind. Same is the case with love. You cannot own it. You can only appreciate its beauty and nurture it."

A lot of times we might have seen that in this world, one often tries to impose certain rules/disciplines which one thinks would be best for his/her loved ones. While this is definitely borne out of a good will for the loved one, there should be a limit to the amount of force one applies to make the loved one follow that rule/discipline. It may so happen that what one thinks is best for his/her loved one, may not be the best really.

In fact, a great secret underlying almost all philosophies which man finds difficult to comprehend, is to love and still not be possessive at the same time :)

Perhaps one who has mastered this control over himself is truly a member of the Kingdom of God.

Back from a vacation

2005-10-17T22:49:00.000-07:00

Me back from a gr8 vacation. Would blog on a lot of stuff soon :)

Priyasaki - Movie Review

2005-10-10T00:51:00.000-07:00

There are two things that stood out in the movie. One I liked. One I hated. I am planning to blog indivudually on both those things. But before that a preview of what I liked and hated:

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In one scene Sadha is in the beach taking a walk with Maddy and she sees a couple where the guy says:

Guy to his lover : "I would do anything for you dear. I would always be there for you ...blah blah blah....and some mushy stuff "

Gal : "That is so sweet of you. I would always be there for you too"

Seeing this, Sadha, who has actually split up with Maddy, and is about to get a divorce, says to this gal:

Sadha to Gal : " Dont trust these fellows...they are just full of lies. Don't waste your time like this. All they do is say all these sweet things before marriage, and after that it is all just lies. "

Guy to Sadha : "How dare you speak of me like this"

Sadha to Guy: " You shut up. I am just speaking to the girl"

Gal to Sadha : " Hey lady. I know that what this guy is saying is all full of lies. But to me it does not matter. All the matters is that he is making an attempt to make me happy by saying these things. If you donot expect anything back in love, then there is no reason to be sad in a relationship. I just love him whether or not he does those things he promises me"

This dialogue I liked.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In a scene where Maddy is talking to Sadha, when she is not able to leave her baby and get a divorce with Maddy,

Maddy : "Do you realize how difficult it is for you to leave your 3 month old baby and go? Imagine how difficult it would have been for my mom to leave me when you asked if we could live separately, when she has been with me for 30 long years. It would be good if you realize it and not try to separate my family."

This argument I hated. Not that I want them to go live separately but for an altogether different reason. I would blog on the same soon.

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Ghajini - Movie Review

2005-10-10T00:42:00.000-07:00

Weekend means 2 movies :)....this was the one I saw first....

Hmm....Is Asin cute or cute? Man, she is the most homely face to don the Tamil cinema face after a long time. Someone who has captured the place Simran used to hold earlier for me.

Anyways, Asin fans may want to visit:

1) http://asinphoto.blogspot.com
2) http://www.asinonline.com
3) http://www.sathya.co.nr/

Ok, now to the movie.

Surya is doing a lot of good to himself in doing good roles such as this. A different attempt. Not sure if there is already a Hollywood movie with a similair storyline. I would recommend you see this movie if not already. Well, you can see it even if you have seen it already :)

Nayantara could use a treadmill. I guess she is becoming the plump baby of the Tamil Cinema, perhaps the position what Jyotika used to hold.

Spoiler:

I wonder how it would really be to have a 15 minute memory span. Must be a tough life. A bold attempt in this movie to kill the heroine. Normally you see cinemas where they just can't kill either the heroine or the hero. In fact, in the Tamil version of the movie "Kaaka Kaaka", Jyotika is killed in the end, but in the Telugu version of the same movie "Gharshana", Asin comes back to life (not that she was killed in the first place....the hero was just assuming she got killed).
Let me see what happens in the Telugu version of this movie.

The movie did not have many major flaws. You would not need your kercheif for the unnecessary sentiments normally poured into most movies. Watch it.

Pollution Certificate Undha?

2005-10-09T23:11:00.000-07:00

Today morning I was learning to ride the bike :) on the way to office. Normally we are stopped en route to office for checking the pollution certificate by the RTA officials. Recently however, the traffic policemen have gathered around the RTA Pollution checkers and stop the vehicles to ask for the pollution certificate.

So, unlucky me, I was stopped by them and we were asked to produce the certificate.

Traffic Police 1: "Pollution Certificate dhikao"

Us : "The bike is new and since it is just 5 months old, we donot have to show one"

TP 1: "TN Registration. Please show us the No Objection Certificate"

Us: (we did not have the NOC ) : "Do we have to get one within 6 months of moving the vehicle here?"

TP 1: "Yes"

Us : "Ok, we donot have one"

TP 1 : "Show me the RC book"

(we were fumbling for the RC book when another TP comes over and says)

TP 2 : "RC book ledhu ante 600 rupees fine" (if you donot have RC book 600 bucks fine)

Us : "We do have the RC book. Hold on"

Then we pulled it out and showed it to him.

TP 2 : "Ok NOC 450 rupees fine"

Us : "Alright but we will need the Challan for the same."

TP 2: "For challan we have to go to the Madhapur Police Station " (which is about 2 kms away from our place)....(I guess he realised we were in a hurry to go to office and said this so that we would feel lazy to go and get the money....)

We however said,

Us : "Thats ok, we would pay the fine. Which of you policemen would come with us to the Police station"

To that the guy said:

TP 2 (muttering under his nose) : "300 rupees dheke chale jaao" (give us 300 bucks and leave)

Us : "We donot have any money with us now. We have to get it from an ATM. We would go and get the same"

TP 2 : "Then leave your Licence with me and get the amount"

Me (to my friend): "I will stay back. You go and get the amount"

After a while my friend came with the money and we said

Us : " Ok let us go to the police station"

TP 1 : "We have to go to the Jubilee hills police station " (which is nearly 6 Kms away)

Us: "What?? You just told us madhapur station and now you are saying Jubilee Hills"

TP 1: "No sir, it is available only there"

Since we were already late for office and were quite pissed off, we decided we would give the money now, but would demand a challan to be given tomorrow..

TP 2 :" Sir, if you pay us once, we would never catch you again in this route. So you donot have to worry about that"

How dare he.

First of all it was wrong of him to ask for a bribe, and on top of that he is insinuating that we let this go.

Us : "Thats ok. We will come here again tomorrow, and you keep the challan ready. We will pay the remaining amount."

And we left.

Anyways, a few lessons learnt:

1) I dont think all of these policemen are genuine. When someone does not have a chellan book nearby to give us the fine, you better dont trust him to be a real policeman and pay the amount he asks for. He may not be authorised to collect money in the first place.

2) A lot of people just give money to get the heck over with, but it is better to be strong in certain cases and insist for original receipt

3) 100 rupees is not much different from 300 rupees , seeing how much we earn these days. Hence, please, please try to take the original receipt and not bribe the policman. Bribe givers breed corruption and not bribe takers. Bribe takers have nowhere to go , if no one is ready to pay the bribe. The 100 rupees that you give, will tempt him to ask for more from others.

Believe me, when we said that we want the chellan, you should see the look on the guys face. The policemen saw us with respect and they started to look down in shame. All they could do after that was just mutter under their noses and speak to us without looking at us on the face.

4) Try to get an NOC :) and try not to break traffic rules.

How's this?

2005-10-04T04:48:00.000-07:00

A lazy saturday evening. My friends are in a dreamy state. I am wondering what to do next.

"How about a movie and then a dinner outside?" , I cried.

The guys were too lazy to say "Yes", and muttered something under their nose.

"Come on Guys, lets go and catch the X-Men Movie, it has been released and is running in Symphony theatre in MG Road.", I said jumping up and down.

Seeing that there is nothing better to do, RL, Ksri, SunD, Pam and Ponp finally agreed to watch the movie.

At the theatre,

"Machi, check it out." , said RL

"Where da?" , I said

"3 o clock, behind SunD. Man , is that guy lucky to be talking to 4 chics.", said RL

The others then make the grave mistake of turning around immediately and taking a look all of a sudden. This prompted those girls to turn and give us a cold stare :(

"Dei looses, can't you all slowly turn so as to not get noticed. Look how embarassing this is", scolded RL as we all sheepishly acted as if we never looked that way.

"Machi, when will our day come da? Look at me, talking to you idiots. How I wish I was that guy talking to 4 cool chics instead of you losers.", I said.

"Aiyya, as if all the chics want to come and talk to you. We guys are more than enough company for you. Shut up and get some pop corn.", said everyone together.

The movie went well. We decided to go to the French Pizza store nearby and this is where the story gets kickstarted.

"Guys, check it out", I said

This time the guys were careful so as to not turn immediately and they all turned casually without causing any embarassment to notice that a couple was smooching their lips off in one corner of the hotel.

Although it was a nice turn on, especially since the gal was should I say "Oooh lala", we guys were a bit frustratedby this public behaviour.

"Machi, they should ban these things in Public places da", said Pam

"Dei, why do you bother what they do da?" said Ponp

"What are you guys talking about da?", asked SunD slowly waking up from his dream world.

"Dei, it is not the question of us bothering about it or not bothering da, just look at them, they are causing so much embarassment to everyone nearby", I said.

"Hopeless fellows", said Ksri.

Then our Pizza came and as we were digging in , the scene in the corner became hotter.
The gal slowly sat on this guys lap and they were now turning the whole place into an oven.

At this RL freaked out and said to me "Machi, this is too much da. There is a small boy having dinner with his parents in that corner da. Why dont we do something about this before that boy sees these two idiots consummating in a public place"

"Let us first tell the hotel owner to do something about it", I said.

"Waiter! can you please ask that couple to find a room and continue whatever they are doing instead of here"

"Sir, pardon me, but that person happens to be a very rich customer and we would lose a lot of business if we irritate him"

The waiter left.

"Machi, I have an idea" said RL and said something to me.

I was game.

We first went up to the couple and said in a polite manner that they are causing a lot of embarassment to the public around and asked them to take it somewhere else.

"Hey man, why dont you mind your own business. This is a free country. I can do as I please. This is my girlfriendand I am kissing her. As long as she does not have any objection to it, it is none of your business. So get outof here."

"Sir, I do agree that it is your girlfriend. However there are people of various ages sitting in this hotel and it is very embarassing for them when you behave this way. Especially when they have small kids or old parents sitting with them"

"I dont know when will India ever improve. These people talk of all this nonsense about culture and stuff. Why dont we grow up. Where is the bloody independence man. Why cant people just mind their own business. I dont mind if you kiss your girlfriend here or anywhere, then why do you disturb me?"

At this we both knew it was time for Plan B.

We both pulled a chair right next to them. Sat there. Put our hands on our chin and started watching them go about their smooching.

At this the couple really got pissed.

"Hey you two, how dare you come and watch what I am doing? Don't you have any decency?"

"You asking us? .... Well.... Frankly!...... No! We rather wanted to watch a good X rated movie tonight anyways. Since we are getting it free, wedon't mind taking the full advantage of it. Please continue. " I said, and motioned my other friends.

Now everyone pulled up a chair and came next to the couple and started watching , hand in their chin. Never had we concentrated this hard , even for our Advanced Calculus class.

"To hell with you idiots. I am getting out of here. Come honey lets go", he said and stormed out!!!!!!!

"Hmm...a nice day guys. Come lets go get that movie we were planning to watch late night"

Women Liberation - Are we taking it too far?

2005-10-03T00:52:00.000-07:00

Ok, a very very , very very , very controversial subject. I accept.

I am going to deal with this in a manner that I hope does not hurt any sentiments and is as neutral as possible. Pardon me if unintentionally these views hurt someone.

I am going to discuss this point by point:

1) When women are forced to follow some rule, as was the case in Anna University, when a ban was imposed on Jeans and T-Shirt, a common misconception is that it amounts to "Oppressing Women" . I would not ascribe to such a thought. The reason why a ban is imposed on something is not with the intention of oppressing someone but to bring about an order in something.

Let me be more clear:

When we go to a boardroom meeting wearing a "Lungi" (it is a comfort wear that someone usually wears in their home) and a torn T-Shirt, we may be allowed inside the boardroom that one time. But the very next day there will be a memo on the office notice board that says that everyone should follow only "Formal" dress code in their offices.

There is an unsaid "Rule" that one person is expected to wear something in a place. It is ok if you wear a Lungi in your house but it is not ok to wear the same in a boardroom meeting. It is ok if we wear a sleeveless and shorts in your house but not so in a temple , which is why , appreciably, some religions allow men and women to worship in separate places within the same temple, so as to avoid distraction.

What I am trying to say is that, a "Rule" is not meant to oppress someone but rather to bring about an order in the way of life. If order is not there in life, then we can question just about anything in life and get away with it.

An educational institution is a place where one comes to gain knowledge. At a tennis court it is understandable to wear a shorts, but not so in an educational institution. A gym is a place appropriate to wear a sleeveless tops, but not an educational institution. By saying so is not to oppress women or stop their liberation in any manner. The same rule also applies to men. They are not supposed to wear lungis or shorts to colleges either.

Hence I wish to stress that "Oppression" and "Moral Policing" and "Rule Making" are three different things and should first be separated. They each deserve a different approach to argument. When one mixes the three and puts them under the head of "Oppression" it is a mistake, but when one clearly sees the difference then it is not so bad.

Let me illustrate:

"Donot wear sleeveless anywhere, you are not supposed to wear it because we say so" - Oppression
"A sleeveless top should not be worn by women because it is degrading to our culture." - Moral Policing
"You are not allowed to wear a sleeveless top in an office because a lot of our customers often visit the office premises and we expect to be in formal dress. " and "You are supposed to wear only conservative dresses in college because it is distracting students when otherwise." - Rule Making

Once the distinction is made among the three it becomes easier to really argue on the subject. An institution has every bloody right to impose its own rules and regulations and in case you are so hell bent against it, then it is better you go and join an institute which does not impose such rules.

Do we go and argue in an office as to why we cannot stand in the front of the building and shout at the top of our voice? Simple answer: If you do, you are then chucked out of the organization.

Rules are rules and an institution has a right to demand from its members that which it sees would benefit the organization, and in this case, the demand is not so outrageous as to merit such uprising.

2) Another common fad which is getting popular these days is to call any "Male" member of the society a "Male Chauvunistic Pig, MCP for short", whenever he even tries to correct a woman. I do agree that there are a lot of things that us men have to learn and yes believe us, we are trying. But at the same time I would request that the same effort be taken from the other side to understand that when a man says :
"Women are very good at taking care of children", he means that "Women are very affectionate and far better than men at handling children and it is a natural thing when women fare better at being a parent than a man, i.e a mother is more important than a father"

IT DOES NOT, and I stress, IT DOES NOT MEAN "Sit at home and watch the children, while I would go to work and earn the bread". So please donot jump up and down when someone says that children need to spend more time with their mother.

Child raising is no mean task, and to get a certificate that someone has done a good job at it , is , believe me, far more better than winning the best employee award. You feel more bad when someone says your son/daughter is a thorn in the society than when you donot get the "Outstanding" grade in office.

This does not mean that women should not go to work or does not mean that only they have to take care of household chores at all. IT just means a vast majority of women are better at handling a child than are men because of their natural ability to "care" more. Men at the same time are by a natural evolutionary process, "Physically" stronger than most women.

While I accept men have to come out of this feeling that they are the only bread winners, I would like to stress that women too, play their role correctly. In all the puranas and the Upanishads, women are held so highly as to call them the "Upholders of Society".

Anyways, there are as many opinions as there are heads in this world, and this is just what I think :).

A million typewriters and a million monkeys all over the world. :)

I hope I have not caused any hard feelings by this post. It is just to highlight some distinctions and some ways by which both sides can benefit themselves and move towards a more civilised way of life.

The Thatha from Mylapore - IV

2005-10-03T00:01:00.000-07:00

I would suggest you read a bit more than the initial few lines as that is where this story gets better :)

"Thatha, first do you have an internet connection? If not you would have to get one before you can check your emails.", cried Gopal.

"Oh is it. How do I get one?"

"Here, call up this number or go to their office. They will tell you all the procedures"

"Thanks da kanna, I will first get the Internet connection"

Thatha dials the number 24456200.

An automated answer at the other end welcomes thatha : "Welcome to BSNL services. For Broadband services please dial 1. For Dial Up services please dial 2. For customer care please dial 9"

Not sure what he wanted, he pressed 9 to hear a ring at the other end for a few moments.

"Hello sir. A very good day to you. This is Lakshmi speaking. How may I help you?"

"Well, I want to get an Internet connection in my house and I am not really sure how to proceed. Can you please help me out."

"Sir, can you please tell your house address and we would send our customer services representative over to your houseto set up the connection. What kind of a connection would you prefer sir, a broadband or a dial up?"

"Well, I am not really sure what those are. Can you please explain them"

After a few dialogue exchanges about the various price ranges, thatha settles for the Dial Up Connection.

"Well, that is settled now. Let me just relax in my easy chair for sometime"

The thatha takes the Dinamalar and reads the headline story of the day:

"Crackdown on dance shows in city hotel" ( Courtesy : Dinamalar(r) Photos:

http://www.dinamalar.com/2005sep26/impfn.asp

http://www.dinamalar.com/2005sep26/imp7.asp

The Hindu (r) Version :

http://www.hindu.com/2005/09/28/stories/2005092809380100.htm/)

After reading the story all thatha could help thinking was "In those days, we were afraid of talking to women in public places. Surely Kali Yuga is at its peak. What happened to love under closed quarters. Public Display of affection seems to be the order of the day. If we talk about these things to the youngsters then they say that we are not modern enough in our thinking. If we show affection in our own homes and not in Public places, then does that mean that we love our wifes any less than those who display it in public. Animals display their affection without caring for others , but can we be like them? Can we be so oblivious of our surroundings? I dont know where we are headed. Boy, am I glad that the girl in that photograph is not my daughter."

The next story in the list was on :

Actress sparks controversy over Pre-Marital Sex: (The Hindu (r) Version

http://www.hindu.com/2005/09/29/stories/2005092916020300.htm)

"In those days Saroja Devi and Padmini used to wear Skin dress when they were about to be touched by Sivaji or MGR. Look at the women these days, talking about things which would embarass everybody. I only wish such things were better left to be understood rather than brought out in open and discussed.

Anna University Bans Cellphones and Jeans: (Link : http://www.annauniv.edu/vc/cell_banned.htm)

"Padikkara pasangalukku edhukku cell phone (why do studying students need Cell Phones?). It is a good thing that such restrictions are brought into place. Especially since cameras are available in cell phones these days, women will feel a lot safer without perennially fearing their being shot at. Also the children will be able to concentrate better in the classroom with the ban on sleeveless dress and jeans pants. I donot see why we have to imitate so much from the west. These days we are just forcing ourselves into ruin by questioning all the things in life. I am afraid to think what the future would hold if things go the way they are at present.

I would want to ask a simple question to these youngsters. When we ask them why they wear Jeans and T-Shirt, they reply saying that it is comfortable and hence we wear them. Let me ask them back the question, The Dhoti is perhaps the most comfortable of all dresses, and it is so free and is pretty easy to wear and use, but does the west borrow this idea from us? If they are not even thinking of taking something from us and adopting it into their lives, then why do we have to imitate the dress code of a nation who had infact subjected us to slavery for a large part of the last few centuries. The basic underlying nature, the very reason, the for us imitating the west is not because we feel their dress is comfortable. It all boils down to an inherent inferiority complex in us which tempts us to behave like them so that we think we are better of. A sense of pride in oneself and ones own culture would never tempt this kind of a behaviour. Only a man who is dissatisfied with what he IS tries to become what he IS NOT. I do hope we all realize our own greatness and change ourselves so that in a matter of time we see the westerners adopting our way of life rather than vice versa."

After that the thatha read a few articles on the fight between the fight between Ganguly and Chappel and framed his own opinions on the subject and went to sleep on the easy chair.

- The opinions expressed here are those of the Thathas , consistent with what an old man would think in this period, and not of my own. Donot form any interpretations on the same as this is a story. Please donot come back to me and ask why I said so :) . I did not say anything....it is the thatha.

Thotti Jaya - Movie Review

2005-10-02T23:39:00.000-07:00

Well, looks like my last few posts have all been movie reviews :)...well yes, I am watching a lot of movies these days :).

If you see tables flying here and there, fire sparks everywhere, blood spurting out from the screen and big fat macho men getting beaten black and blue, you are probably watching "Thotti Jaya"

I must say that I was prejudiced about Simbhu when I first saw him due to the impression that his dad had left :). But I must say that he has clearly carved a niche for himself. Although the movie has nothing much in it and is a time-pass, Simbhu clearly is defining his own ways. I see him having a good future because he puts all the right ingredients in a masala movie....not too much salt, not too less pepper...and there you are , a movie which is bound to run for atleast 50 days. :)

I changed my opinion about this guy after the movie "Manmadhan" where he plays a psycho. Great job that.

This movie reminded me a lot about "Gilli" . Maybe I should call this "Gilli 2"

ok then...I am gonna blog about something else other than movies in the next post. Too much masala into my blog :).

Englishkaaran

2005-09-30T10:37:00.000-07:00

It is night 11:08 PM and I am blogging. I get a feeling this is going to end up as an addled piece of thought

Ah well, I am not getting sleep so what the hell.

I happened to watch this movie by Sathyaraj and I must say , Phew!!!. Finally a movie which is not centered around adolescent love.

Basically it is about letting people pursue whatever careers they want. One dialogue which he finally delivers impressed me "If everybody has to do what their dad is doing , then did Armstrongs dad take his dog for a walk in the moon? Was APJ's dad a rocket scientist?..."

What do parents typically do?

If the parent is a typical Indian middle class fellow then he probably expects the following from the child:

1) Study well. Be the first rank in the class.
2) It is ok if you donot participate in any extra curricular activities. But be first in class in studies.
3) It is ok if you want to learn the guitar, or play the violin but not at the cost of studies.
4) Dont speak about money related matters with elders
5) You want to try something new?
Is it a school science project?
No?
Then sorry dear.

I have seen my share of parents who fall under this category and believe me, this is definitely getting us nowhere. What happened to creative thinking? Why do we not nurture such feelings amongst the young. No wonder India rarely produces any gold medals except in the Math Olympiads (that too rarely).

All we end up creating by forcing education on children is nothing but a very well seasoned robot which has all the qualities of the generation that just finished its quota of slavery to a circumscribed thought process.

All this probably stems from mans desire to see his kith and kin as an extrapolation of his own self. And in case a lawyers son wantsto be a painter , the lawyer feels that he has not done his part correctly.

This is the one reason why I donot ascribe to the Varnasrama System. Of all the systems that I have come across in my life, the Varnasrama system is perhaps the most suited for Spiritual as well as Material progress, but its biggest flaw lies in the catch that "X's son does what X does and to follow someone elses duty is to partake sin". Our ancestors were followers of this system and it has passed on through generations, and perhaps still lingers in us and we all want our children to be a lot like us.

I hope the situation changes and we see more parents encouraging the children to try and achieve what they are really good at, and where their heart really wants to take them. Life is not just about learning the third differential of log(x). It is a lot more than that! Realize it!

Ah Aah - Tamil Movie Review

2005-09-30T01:58:00.000-07:00

Dont watch this movie. Period.

No, not even for the heroine. Just watching the trailers should be enough if you want to watch it for the heroine. Nambiar spoiled his image in this movie the same way Amitabh did by acting in Boob..oops Boom (sorry about that.)

Songs are great. ARR gives his best to any movie. This along with Rakshagan would go down as two movies with great songs but nothing more.

Even the movie New was better than this one by SJS. I dont know why he is acting. He was better of directing and letting Vijay or Ajith do the job for him. The heroine resembles Nadhiya more than Simran if you ask me....in fact in some angles she looks a lot like Sameera Reddy.

Anyways, watch it only when you feel like eating your own feet after the movie is over. Well, as for me, I did bite my feet off and am limping the last few days.

Back to Blogging

2005-09-30T01:54:00.000-07:00

Ok, it has been a long time and I am really bored. I need some space to express myself once again. So I am starting to blog once more.

The Thatha from Mylapore Part - III

2005-08-04T00:25:00.000-07:00

"Paypaaaree , boootiyaareeeee"

"Paypaaaree , boootiyaareeeee"

The loud noise woke up our thatha. It was the Old Newspaper ,Old bottle collector screaming at the top of his voice.

"Hey paper walla", shouted thatha. The newspaper daily Dinamalar had accumulated over the last few months and thatha wanted to cash it in.

"Yes, sir. Coming over..." replied the scrap paper salesman.

"How much do you pay for a kilo of Dinamalar (the local news daily)" asked thatha.

"Sir, 3.5 rupees" he replied.

"What? How come the inflation never affects the rates of the old newspapers. All the pricesseem to increase but you people never pay more than a meagre amount for old newspapers. I will let it go at 5 rupees a kilo and nothing less" said thatha firmly.

"Sir...business has been bad these days. Let us agree to 4 rupees a kilo. Please donot bargainfor the one or two rupee profit I get sir. I am but a poor man" he replied

At this point thatha had to let go as he could not haggle with the poor man who was all tired from screaming at the top of his voice just to pick old newspapers.

"Sir, please check the weights" he said as he started to weigh the newspapers.

Thatha was well aware of all the tricks that these guys pulled such as having an improper weightand pressing one hand on the handle bar to push the weights to one side and the best trick of all wasto use an already weighed paper to weigh more papers and that way you keep gaining incrementallythe more the newspapers. He was not going to be fooled by this man.

Thatha bought a kilo of potatos he had just bought and ensured that the weights were indeed as they specify and he carefully overlooked the entire procedure. Finally he was convinced that the lot he hadweighed 10 kilos. The man paid thatha 40 rupees and left.

Thatha was just finished with the newspaper seller when he heard the neighborhood boy Gopalcome in.

Gopal was a tall bespectacled boy. Face full of freckles from adolescence. Wavy hair.

He had promised that he would help to teach the thatha how to use the computer to check emails.

"Dey Gopal, " shouted thatha, " when are you coming over to teach me about checking emails da. "

"Coming thatha. Let me first change and have my snacks" he retorted.

Thatha then switched on the computer and waited for the flower he drew to come up. But instead, he got some other screen. He was worried and tried to open the same paint brush software he had used thinking that it may be stored there. After half an hour of futile attempts thatha was quite annoyed and started to curse modern inventions just as Gopal came in.

-- to be contd.

My experiments with "Cooking" - Part I

2005-07-31T22:22:00.000-07:00

Sambhar

It was a lazy Sunday afternoon and I had nothing left to do. I had just woken up and sleep was not an option. There was nothing impressive on TV either. Two of my roommates had gone to Chennai for a vacation and the other was out somewhere and I was all alone.
Of all the things that I could have done, I thought I would "Cook" the lunch today. A bad decision?

Lessons that I learned about cooking (From past "experience"):

1) Patience. Patience. Some more patience. Even more Patience. If you are not patient enough to read these many "Patience"es then you ought to be even more patient when you cook.
For example,

The moment you think the cooker is taking too long and remove the lid, all you find will be a froth of what will look like paper mache in water. You need to wait for it to become BOILED RICE.

The moment you think enough stirring, you will only find water + tamarind + vegetables + sambhar powder all sitting separately and not Sambhar. For it to become sambhar you gotta wait. Wait and Wait you gotta do.

2) The second important lesson while cooking that I learnt is that, KEEP ALL THE GODDAMM INGREDIENTS CLOSE BY and then start to cook.

If you donot do this, then you will be writing something like the following:
"I once started to make a curry and when it was half baked I was searching for chilli powder :( and...." ..the rest is history

3) Always. Always...be near the stove when something is getting heated on it.

Experience teaches. I now have a vessel that has a hole in the bottom due to overheating and I have eaten burnt curry atleast half a dozen times now (which forms about 50% of the times I have cooked curry roughly).

Ok with all those rules now set, I started to cook this weeks sambhar. I should tell that till date my sambhar has never been more than a mangled mixture of "paruppu" (dal) , vegetables , water and Sambhar powder. (Luckily the salt dissolves in water, so that atleast was not a problem).

I decided to settle for Murungakkai sambhar (Drumstick Sambhar).

Steps to Reproduce my Sambhar:

1) First take a lemon sized Imli (Puli they call it in tamil, I think it is Tamarind in English) and drop it in say 2 tumbler fulls of water... ) and allow it to stay dissolved for about 5 minutes (I forgot I had put the Imli in water and started to watch TV by cutting the required ingredients, namely tomato and drumstick and Black neem leaves (they call it Karu Veppa Elai in Tamil...I think the literal translation is an overkill...but have to live with it for now)

2) Later I removed the tamarind from the water and put it to boil and dropped all the ingredients into the water and let it boil in simmer for sometime with the most important ingredient of all, Sambhar powder - 5 spoonfuls.

Now the rules I mentioned above come into picture :

Rule 2 : Did I Keep all ingredients nearby ? - Yes
Rule 3 : Did I stay near the stove ? - Yes (because there was nothing interesting on TV more than the beautiful boiling Sambhar anyways)

3) Wait until the Sambhar powder smell goes off. This takes patience. Rule #1.

Finally the smell went and I put the Dal (Boiled Paruppu) into it and viola, out came sambhar.
For a good measure I let it boil for some more time.

Drumstick sambhar is tricky for one reason, the drumstick does not get boiled that easily...so either you boil it separately before you put it into the sambhar (if you are Ultra Patient), or else wait a long time before you remove the sambhar fromt the stove, Else the drumstick stays unboiled and u get Drumstick + Tamarind Water instead of sambhar.

Well, since this time I faithfully followed the three golden rules, my sambhar was "Not Bad" and I had a good lunch.

Damn it. Even if I follow the golden rules, my Sambhar never tastes like my moms. Have to find out if she has more than these three rules up her sleeve. Guess moms will be moms and we will always be duds compared to them :(.

The Pineapple and the Bee

2005-05-24T03:21:00.000-07:00

Chanced upon one more fine poem that ought to have been in our twelfth standard textbooks if you ask me:

THE PINEAPPLE ANDTHE BEE

The pineapples, in triplerow,
Were basking hot, and all in blow.
A bee of most discerning taste
Perceived the fragrance as he pass'd,
On eager wing the spoiler came,
And search'd for crannies in the frame,
Urged his attempt on every side,
To every pane his trunk applied,
But still in vain, the frame was tight.
And only pervious to the light:
Thus having wasted half the day,
He trimm'd his flight another way.

Methinks, I said, in thee I find
The sin and madness of mankind.
To joys forbidden man aspires,
Consumes his soul with vain desires;
Folly the spring of his pursuit,
And disappointment all the fruit.
While Cynthio ogles, as she passes,
The nymph between two chariot glasses,
She is the pineapple, and he
The silly unsuccessful bee.

The maid who views with pensive air
The show-glass fraught with glittering ware,
Sees watches, bracelets, rings and lockets,
But sighs at the thought of empty pockets;
Like thine, her appetite is keen,
But ah, the cruel glass between!
Our dear delights are often such,
Exposed to view, but not to touch;
The sight our foolish heart inflames;
We long for pineapples in frames;
With hopeless wish one looks and lingers,
One breaks the glass, and cuts his fingers;
But they whom Truth and Wisdom lead,
Can gather honey from a weed.

William Cowper